Two Ends of the Spectrum
by Spunky0ne
Summary: An attack by a strange hollow leaves Byakuya in an odd state. Mystified, the Kuchiki elders place the noble in Renji's care and charge him with finding a solution...Rating changed to M, yaoi, mpreg.
1. Soul Destruction

**Two Ends of the Spectrum**

**By Spunky0ne**

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_**This plot bunny comes from the amazingly complex and fascinating mind of Walkure Leaud. Thanks, once again, for pointing me in the direction of a great story! Love, Spunky**_

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**Chapter 1: Soul Destruction**

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_**We see each other through odd lenses…glass that distorts and bends, that knows only shadings of truth or reality. We are not black and white, not good and evil, even when broken in two.**_

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Could two people _be_ anymore different?

Renji scratched his head and pretended to be focused on the report he'd been reading and rereading for the last half hour, while the serene looking noble across the room worked steadily at the stack of papers on his desk.

_Damn it, he looks like he actually likes doing this! How can that be? We sit here for hours, scratching out reports…making schedules…doing all of this boring, repetitive shit, and he sits there looking like he's reading a favorite book…or daydreaming, but when he does that, he (unlike me) gets everything done!_

Renji sighed and rested his face on his hand. He felt the dark, inquisitive eyes touch him for a moment and fought to keep from fidgeting or squirming. He wasn't glaring or even trying to make a point. He was just glancing…looking up from his work…coming up for air. But to Renji, it felt like an assault.

Then he remembered…

Tea…

He was careful not to sigh or roll his eyes or to look as though he had forgotten that Byakuya took his tea every day at precisely ten, two and six. He knew the schedule…just constantly lost track of time…unlike the Kuchiki heir, who seemed to be so orderly and aware that he noticed the number of seconds late it was.

Renji took a last look at the paper he had been reading, then stood and stretched, and started down the hallway towards the squad kitchen. It felt good to move after having to sit for so long. It cleared the cobwebs from his head and brought some life back into him. And…it also gave him time (while he waited for the tea to steep) to think about the million ways in which he was different from his captain.

_I'm too tall and lanky and he's smaller and perfectly contoured…_

_I come from the Rukongai and he's noble born…_

_I'm tanned and leathery and he's soft and pale…_

_I'm loud and he's quiet, even quieter when he's pissed…_

_I can't sit still for a minute and he can sit, barely breathing for hours on end…_

_I live for the moment and he is a creature of routines and habits…_

_I'm an odd looking, tattooed freak of nature and he's fucking beautiful…_

_So damned gorgeous…_

_Captain Kuchiki…_

_Captain fucking hot Kuchiki…_

No wonder he couldn't concentrate…why he constantly made mistakes and earned the noble's dissatisfied frown (which was also incredibly hot…). No wonder he was constantly late with the tea and sometimes had to make it a second time, because he got distracted and put in too many tea leaves…or too few…or didn't allow it to steep for the right number of minutes…or fill the cup to the proper level for drinking without spilling.

_There's a word for that…anal._

_But I shouldn't start thinking about that…_

_About that firm, sexy ass and what I'd do if…_

"Ow! Shit!" he hissed, flash stepping to the sink to stick his burned hand under the cool, running water.

He blinked back the instant tears the stinging pain caused and tried to keep counting in his head so that he wouldn't screw up the tea. He got back just in time to pour too much tea into the cup…then took a small sip (even though it wasn't his favorite tea) to bring it to the proper level. He walked back to the office and set the tea in the noble's hand, trying not to flinch and spill the tea when their hands touched, then walking back to his desk and watching as the soft, perfect lips touched the edge of the cup, just where his had…and it was almost as though they had kissed.

"Is there a problem Abarai?" asked the Captain.

"Ah…no…just wondered if the tea was acceptable."

"Yes, the tea is fine, Abarai, arigato," Byakuya said smoothly, turning back to his work.

"Renji?"

He jumped at the use of his given name. Usually, Byakuya used his surname.

"Captain?"

"Come here."

Swallowing hard and wondering what the hell he had done wrong, he climbed to his feet and walked to the noble's desk.

"Yes, Captain?" he said, sitting in the chair beside the noble's desk.

"Give me your hand."

"Huh?" Renji said, blinking.

He extended a hand, looking down at it in confusion.

"Other hand, Abarai."

_Oh, that hand…_

He extended the hand he had burned while making the tea. Byakuya's hand touched his, sending a jolt through his stomach and making him catch his breath. He hoped the noble would just think it was because the damned burn hurt.

The pale fingers curved around his gently and soft green light wrapped around their joined hands. And while Byakuya gazed down at their hands, Renji cautiously admired the lovely wide gray eyes, the perfectly sculpted lines of his face, the long, graceful white throat, the pale green ginpaku kazahana no uzuginu, the perfectly tailored and pressed haori set against the deep black and also perfectly fitted shihakushou. He breathed in the mingled scents of sakura and green tea and wondered what it would be like to taste those slightly parted lips.

He realized suddenly that the dark eyes had lifted and were watching him. A flush roared onto his cheeks and throat and he pulled his hand free of the noble's.

_He has to know, right? How could he not see? It's so fucking obvious! If he would only say something! If he would just do something!_

But the dark, secretive eyes had dismissed him and had returned to the work on his desk.

"Arigato, Captain," the redhead said, standing.

He walked back to his desk like a dog with his tail between his legs.

Only if a dog had a hard on like this, he wouldn't be afraid to do something about it. Of course, another dog wouldn't be likely to cut him into little pieces with a swirl of pretty sakura petal blades either. Kami, it would almost be worth it, though…

He was dragged out of his thoughts by the arrival of a hell butterfly.

_Captain Kuchiki, menos grande have attacked the shinigami base on the Hueco Mundo border. Proceed to the base at once with a relief detachment._

Renji was on his feet and halfway to the staging area before the message was finished. As awkward and dull minded as he was around the office, when it was time to defend the Seireitei, his mind sharpened until it had an edge more dangerous than his blade. He lined up the unit, called out the orders and had them out of the sixth division and flash stepping towards the crossover point in record time. He felt Byakuya sweep up beside him and then continue a step ahead, the rest of the way to the base. He continued to run, his eyes planted firmly on the back of his captain's haori.

They passed through the senkaimon and emerged inside the shinigami base. Immediately, the sounds of battle reached their ears and a heady bolt of adrenaline moved through the redhead. The squad stood ready in the gathering area as Renji followed Byakuya up into the battlements. The noble studied the lay of the battlefield, the positioning of the fighters and the approach of the enemy, then turned to the red-haired vice captain.

"Take your group to the right. Climb the hill and provide kido support to the fighters. It's the eleventh, so don't expect them to be using much but their blades."

"Hai, Captain," Renji said, flash stepping away.

He led his group onto the rocky hillside along the edge of the battlefield and ordered the fighters into position. The advance guard set the shield to provide cover from incoming ceros as the kido specialists fell into stance and began their incantations. Renji stood ready on the hilltop, watching as Byakuya's group crested the hill on the far side and a third group of fighters surged onto the field below them.

Kido fire exploded over the top of the hill and rained down on the enemies behind the battle lines. Furious howls erupted form the hollows and a group of winged beasts rose into the air and turned toward them. Renji drew his zanpakutou.

"Ban kai, Hihio Zabimaru!" he cried.

The skeletal snake screeched to life and roared over the shield, soaring down and loosing a crippling red blast at the horde of flying hollows.

"Hikotsu Taihou!" he shouted.

The snake's mouth opened wide and a blast of red fire blasted out, surrounding the stunned hollows and burning them into ash. As they fell, he turned the snake back into a coil and searched the field for any further threats.

It was then that he noticed the flash of petals erupting from the hilltop across from him. Byakuya stood at the top of the hill, his weapon in ban kai mode, sending hards blasts of petals down at a group of menos that was heading towards the battlefield from the far side. He followed the petals with a heavy shock of blue kido fire that roasted the approaching menos and made them explode into nothing. The noble sheathed his sword and started to turn back towards the main battlefield.

Then Renji saw a sight his eyes could not quite believe. A dark shape suddenly appeared on the hillside…to close to the turning noble.

"Captain! Behind you!" Renji screamed, bringing the skeletal snake around and leaping onto its back. He soared across the field, he eyes locked on the scene ahead of him. Byakuya's body continued to turn in slow motion as the dark shape at his back raised its clawed hands above its head and summoned a huge red fire scythe. Byakuya's eye registered the motion and his hand went to his blade as he turned. His weapon was out and lifted up to block the incoming red scythe. But somehow, inexplicably, the scythe passed through Senbonzakura and down through the noble's braced body.

Renji blinked, then covered his eyes as a huge flash of red light enveloped Byakuya and the hollow. For a moment, the noble's silhouette stood tall and firm on the hilltop, then the strong legs buckled and he sank to the ground at the hollow's feet.

"Captain!" Renji howled, sweeping down and closing in.

The hollow drew a sword and raised it high over the noble's fallen body. The blade fell in slow motion as the snake reached them and forced the strange hollow back. Renji shifted to his shikai and sent the jagged blade flying in the hollow's direction, knocking the blade aside and forcing the hollow to flash step away. It stood in the distance, glaring at Renji with glowing green eyes, then it disappeared, leaving Renji with his fallen captain at the top of the hill.

"Captain!" yelled Renji, dropping to his knees next to the stricken noble.

Oddly, he saw no blood on the pristine, white skin. His face was deathly pale and his chest barely seemed to move. He saw bruising on the captain's body and leaned over him, sending his reiatsu into the noble's still form. He found what seemed to be severe internal bleeding and caught his breath at the sight of blood emerging from Byakuya's nose, mouth and ears. Healing green light flared around his hands and sank into the motionless noble's body.

"Get Hanatarou!" he shouted to the scrambling member of Byakuya's group.

He leaned over Byakuya, raising his reiatsu until the ground around them rumbled softly.

"Come on…damn it, move…breathe…do something. Captain…"

But Byakuya's body remained silent and unresponsive.

"Vice Captain Abarai!" called Hanatarou, "What happened? Did you see?"

"It was a hollow," Renji said as Hanatarou replaced him at Byakuya's side, "Big…about six or so feet tall…green skin and glowing green eyes. It raised its claws and attacked with a scythe made of red light. It passed through Senbonzakura and hit him dead on!"

Renji's brow furrowed suddenly and he looked around, his eyes scanning the area around them carefully.

"What is it?" asked Hanatarou, leaning over the noble and continuing the healing that Renji had started.

"Senbonzakura…His zanpakutou is gone!"

Hanatarou looked up from where he bent over Byakuya and looked around.

"You didn't see any sign of how it disappeared? No odd releases? There are no broken pieces? Any residual reiatsu?"

"No," Renji said, his panic growing, "Hanatarou, there's no sign at all of what happened!"

"Well, he doesn't seem to have much in the way of spiritual pressure right now. Perhaps it's an effect of the creature's attack and it will just re-form like it always does. Captain Kuchiki took a lot of damage to his body, do maybe his zanpakutou did too."

"Yeah…maybe," Renji said, frowning worriedly.

He turned back for a moment to look at where the clean up crews were moving onto the battlefield and starting to carry away the dead. He turned back again and dropped down beside the healer.

"Hanatarou, tell me honestly…he's hurt really bad, isn't he?"

The healer sighed.

"Despite the lack of damage to the surface of his body, there is a lot of damage inside. I am going to stabilize him and we'll take him back to the Seireitei for surgery."

Renji felt a coldness building inside him.

"But…he'll be okay, right?"

Hanatarou raised his eyes and Renji felt a stab of fear pass through him.

"I don't know, Renji. It's bad."

Renji took a slow breath.

"Is he stable?"

Hanatarou nodded.

"But I don't know if he'll stay that way. We need to get him back as quickly as possible…but the transport team isn't here yet."

"Okay," said Renji, "then I'll take him back. I have the fastest flash step of anyone here but him."

"A-are you sure, sir?" Hanatarou asked uncertainly, "I mean…"

"Hey…it could mean the difference between him living and dying. I'm taking him!"

Without another word, Renji bent and lifted Byakuya into his arms. He turned and flash stepped down off of the hill and back across the battle ground to the base. He shot through the base and past the staring guards at the senkaimon. He barely noticed when he passed through the precipice world, he was so intent on getting his captain back to the Seireitei. The streets flashed by so quickly he didn't see. He trusted his body to turn him in the right directions and focused on speed. Before he knew it, he was racing up the steps and into the fourth division. The injured captain was immediately taken to a room and Renji was taken to wait in a private waiting area.

He sighed and sat down, knowing that the surgery was likely to take a long time. Soon, night had come and it passed by him in a flash…with Rukia arriving and falling into his arms crying…the two of them sitting quietly together…hot tea…looking out the darkened window…and endless, breathless waiting.

His heart stopped as Captain Unohana came out of the room wearing a weary expression. She stopped in front of them and gave them a bracing smile.

"Captain Kuchiki came through the surgery just fine," she assured them, "I admit that I am concerned, because his spiritual pressure is still very low. It may be the shock to his system or an effect of the attack that injured him."

"Can we see him?" Rukia asked.

"Of course," said the healer, smiling, "He is still unconscious, but it shouldn't be too long before he wakes."

"Thank you, Captain Unohana!" Rukia exclaimed, flash stepping towards the noble's room. Renji followed her inside and the two sat down on either side of the bed. They studied his pale face and pained expression worriedly and each held a soft, limp hand. Their silent vigil claimed the rest of the night and it was well into the next day, when Renji finally convinced Rukia to go home to rest and change.

"I'm not going to leave him for a minute!" Renji promised, "Just go and get some rest. I promise that as soon as he wakes, I will send a hell butterfly to let you know."

"All right," the violet-eyed girl said reluctantly, "but when I get back, it's going tobe your turn to go home and rest."

"All right, Rukia…sheesh! Get outta here, will you?"

Rukia shook her head and flash stepped away, leaving Renji sitting alone at his captain's side. He sat quietly beside Byakuya, watching him sleep and thinking back to how normal the day had seemed, right up to the very minute that Byakuya had fallen. He was amazed at how quickly things could change and be undone. He sighed heavily, leaning forward and resting his chin on his hands.

A few hours later, he noticed that Byakuya was beginning to shift about in his sleep. He moaned softly and his eyes rolled beneath the closed eyelids.

"Captain?" Renji said touching his arm gently.

He received the shock of his life as the noble's dark eyes opened and fastened on him. There was a moment of hesitation, then Byakuya dove into Renji's arms, his eyes wide, his heart pounding and his hands clinging tightly to his vice captain.

"Renji!" he gasped, "Oh my kami! That hollow…was…it was so…"

Renji frowned and pulled back slightly, tilting his head and staring at the wide, innocent looking eyes and frightened expression…things that looked awfully out of place on his normally stoic captain's face.

"Ah…Captain Kuchiki," he said, smiling, "You're feeling better…"

"I hurt like hell!" the Kuchiki heir exclaimed, earning him raised eyebrows and a look of confusion from Renji.

"You know…" said Renji, "You've been through a lot, Captain. Why don't you get some more sleep. I think you'll be more…like yourself after some rest."

"Okay," said the noble, lying back against the pillows, "but Renji…promise me you won't leave…p-please. I was having really bad dreams and I always feel better when I'm with you."

"Ah…okay, Captain…uh…sure. Thanks…I mean, it's nice to know you like having me around."

"Well…of course I do," said Byakuya sitting up and reaching for him.

The next thing he knew, Byakuya's arms wrapped tightly around him again and soft lips touched his.

"I love you, Renji…I have for a really long time."

"Wh-what?" Renji whispered, his eyes going as wide as the Kuchiki heir's, "C-captain?"

"What's wrong, Renji? Haven't you wanted me to notice all of the things you do to get my attention? You did want me to notice, right?"

"W-well…um, yeah, but…Captain…I uh…I'll be right back. Just uh…try to close your eyes and get some rest, okay?"

"Renji?" called the noble, "Renji, where are you going?"

The redhead stepped outside the door and shook his head in confusion. He remained there for several long minutes before swallowing hard and walking back into the room.

"Renji!" Byakuya cried, his eyes tearing, "Renji, why did you leave me alone?"

"Hey," said Renji, sitting down beside him and letting the noble's arms wrap around him again, "I didn't leave. I just went out for a minute. I'm here."

"Don't leave me again…" Byakuya sighed, dropping his head onto the redhead's muscular shoulder, "Don't leave me, Renji."

Renji gazed down at the noble, deciding it was probably the drugs that were making him so oddly uncontrolled. He smiled gently and held the noble close, trying not to laugh and promising himself he wasn't going to use the situation to torment the noble…not ever…

It would mortify Byakuya to know he had acted in such a way…

But some part of Renji actually wished it could be real…

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Byakuya stirred and found himself facedown in the sand. Senbonzakura lay beside him, reflecting the bright moonlight. He sat up slowly and rubbed his eyes.

He had no idea how long he had been there…or how he had ended up so far from the battlefield. His body still ached, but a quick assessment told him that he hadn't been badly injured.

He sat still for a moment, trying to sense his position, then frowned as it dawned on him how far into the desert he actually was. He concluded that he must have pursued an enemy or group of them into the desert during the battle, although why he had done it refused to come back to him.

But it hardly mattered…

What mattered was getting back on his feet and returning to the base…or to the nearest base. He slid Senbonzakura back into his sheath and climbed to his feet. Turning slowly, he sensed the position of the base and began walking towards it. He resolved to concern himself with making sense of things when it made sense to do so…and not until.


	2. Like Eating Ice Cream for Breakfast

**Chapter 2: Like Eating Ice Cream for Breakfast**

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_**We live in this moment, turning to the left or right or moving straight ahead. And whichever direction we choose, a new world emerges…**_

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Renji couldn't help but smile as he sat on the bed, holding a comfortably sleeping Byakuya on his shoulder. He knew it wasn't going to last. The drugs would wear off and Byakuya would be Byakuya again. Quiet and contemplative…rigorous in his expectations, and nothing like the sweet, winsome creature perched against his shoulder. He buried his face in the midnight black hair and breathed in the light, sweet scent of sakura. It would be sad in some ways to see Byakuya return to that reserved and closed off person, but in the meantime, Renji planned to enjoy every minute with this softer, gentler version of his captain.

The door opened and Captain Unohana came in. She looked a bit surprised but said little as she quickly examined the Kuchiki heir, then stood back. She tilted her head slightly, thinking.

"How is he doing?" Renji asked.

"Well," said the fourth division captain, "physically, Captain Kuchiki seems much improved. The healing of his body seems to have been successful and he should be well enough to leave soon. But, I continue to be concerned at his low reiatsu level. As he is, he can still function well enough to remain in Soul Society, but he is, for the most part, powerless."

"Huh," huffed Renji, "That is odd, but I'm sure he will be fine. But I have to tell you…he's really kinda cute all spaced out on the drugs you're giving him."

The captain gazed at him with a confused expression.

"But Vice Captain Abarai, we haven't given him any drugs…"

"Wh…Well…that's strange…" pondered Renji.

"What is strange?" asked the healer.

"Well, Captain was awake for a little bit. And while he was awake, we talked some. Captain Unohana, I swear, he looks the same…and I know it's him because my eyes never left him while we were on the battlefield…but he's…ah…different."

"How exactly is he different?" the healer asked.

"Well, for one thing, as soon as he woke, he practically knocked me over, jumping into my arms. Then…he just…well, he kept saying odd things. He didn't want me to leave for a second, and he wanted to put his arms around me. He said he loved me and he even kissed me on the mouth!"

"Hmmm," said the fourth division captain, "That doesn't sound like Captain Kuchiki at all…but he did go through quite an ordeal, and sometimes one will be shocked upon awaking after such a thing. I'm sure he will be more himself when he has rested."

Renji felt less certain, but he nodded anyway and shifted so that he could look down on the sweet, almost smiling face of his captain. He stroked the soft, silken hair and kissed the noble on the top of his head. He glanced up as the healer left and Rukia came into the room. Rukia stopped near the door, staring wide-eyed at the two on the bed.

"R-renji! What are you doing? Nii-sama will be very angry if he wakes up and finds you doing that!"

Renji laughed ruefully.

"I know…but I couldn't help myself. I mean, you know how I feel about him. And when he woke up, he was really out of it…and he insisted that I should get in bed with him and hold him like this. Really, Rukia, it was his idea!"

"Yeah," said the violet-eyed woman, "but you know as well as I do that Nii-sama would not like you climbing in bed with him! You shouldn't take advantage, just because he woke up disoriented. Get out of that bed, before he wakes up and hits you!"

"Huh…" said Renji, "Even pissed off, he wouldn't hit me. He might frown and say, "Abarai, what the devil are you doing?" but he wouldn't actually hit me unless I refused to move when ordered to."

A soft chuckle sounded and Rukia and Renji stared. Byakuya's eye opened and blinked.

"N-nii-sama?" Rukia said, wide-eyed.

"That was a good imitation, Renji. Do it again," the noble said, smiling.

"N-nii-sama…" stammered Rukia, "Nii-sama, just tell me if Renji is bothering you and I'll make him leave you alone."

"You can't make my Renji leave!" Byakuya said, frowning, "only _I_ can make him leave. But I insist that he is going to stay right where he is! Renji is my boyfriend and we can be together all we want to. I want _you_ to leave."

"B-but…Nii-sama…"

"You heard me. Get out! I don't want to talk to you. I only want to be with my Renji."

"Renji," said Rukia, "Do something!"

Renji bit his lip, trying not to laugh.

"Well…I can't make Captain do anything he doesn't want to. And he just told me not to leave him. You're the one he wants to leave."

"But…you…I mean, Nii-sama…" Rukia stuttered, her face turning red.

"You heard Renji," said Byakuya, frowning, "Go away."

He picked up a pillow and hurled it at her. The stunned girl simply stood and let the pillow hit her in the face. She blinked and stared, wondering if this could really be her brother. She was sure there had to be some weird explanation…there had to be. But not knowing what it could be, she turned and walked out the door.

Byakuya smiled.

"She's annoying, isn't she?" he said, "But now that she's gone, I want to kiss you, Renji. Is that okay?"

"You want to…kiss…me?" Renji asked.

He felt a jolt of guilt and another of something more heady. The noble turned in his arms and the soft, perfect lips found his. The kiss was warm and slow, and Byakuya's face wore a lovely expression, his half-closed eyes beautifully dreamy and his face so relaxed and happy. Renji tried to stop himself, but the wonderful, insistent lips nipped at his hungrily and before long, Renji was kissing him back. At first, the kisses were light and gentle, but after a few, Byakuya's mouth opened…and even though he felt guilty, Renji couldn't resist the temptation. He slipped his tongue into Byakuya's mouth and a shaky, weak feeling passed over him. He tasted even better than Renji had imagined, somehow blending sweetness and masculinity together in a mind numbing blend that went straight to the redhead's heart and, unfortunately, his groin too. He groaned softly.

"Are you okay, Renji?" Byakuya asked, breaking away from the redhead's mouth and making Renji nearly groan again with loss.

"I…yeah…"

"You…do like kissing me, don't you?" Byakuya asked, tilting his head slightly.

Renji stared and tried to think of what to say. As he waited for Renji's answer, the noble's eyes darkened and became stormy.

"You…_don't_ like kissing me?" the noble said, his eyes beginning to tear.

"What?" said Renji, breaking out of his confusion, "Captain…of course I like kissing you! Well…no, I love kissing you. You taste really good."

Byakuya blushed and Renji's heart throbbed painfully…the pain second only to the pain in his groin…

"Oh," said the noble, looking down where his member swelled beneath his hakama, "Renji, I've made you hard…"

A hand touched him through the hakama and Renji nearly choked at the wonderful sensation. His erection leaked and throbbed painfully.

"B-bya…stop!" Renji exclaimed, pushing the noble's hand away.

"Bya?" Byakuya said, smiling.

"I'm s-sorry, Captain," Renji said, recovering himself somewhat, "I slipped because I was surprised. I won't let it happen again. I promise."

"It's okay," Byakuya said, smirking, "I _like _it when you call me that!"

Renji stared, his mind spinning as he tried to make sense of what was happening. As cute as it was, it was starting to feel scary. And as Byakuya's hand slipped beneath his hakama and touched his flaring arousal, he knew he couldn't let it continue. His heart and his cock both ached furiously, but he caught the noble's hand and brought it to his lips.

"Captain…"

"Call me Bya."

Renji shook his head.

"Captain…" he said again.

"Renji," Byakuya said, his smile fading and a lovely, forlorn look erupting on his face, "I'm sorry. Did I offend you? I didn't mean to. I saw that you were aroused and I thought you wanted me to touch you. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I won't touch you like that if you don't want me to. I don't want to upset you."

"Captain Kuchiki, this is really confusing…"

"I asked you to call me Bya."

Renji swallowed hard and kissed the noble's fingertips again.

"Okay…Bya. Look…you are really not acting like the person I remember. It doesn't mean that I don't like you. I really do. You're beautiful…and your lips taste really good. And I would like to have you touch me…everywhere. But I can't let you do that when you're obviously not yourself. It would be wrong. And when you regained your senses, you would hate me for taking advantage…and I couldn't stand it if you hated me."

Bya's eyes softened and misted beautifully.

"Oh…Renji, I'm sorry. I didn't know. I mean, I don't feel any different."

"Well," said Renji, a sad feeling sweeping over him, "maybe you don't feel so different on the inside, but you are being different in what you show. You usually don't show your emotions like this."

"So…you want me to be like that?" Bya said, frowning, "You want me to be mean to you like I was before?"

Renji leaned closer and wrapped his arms around Byakuya. He sighed and kissed the noble on the forehead.

"You weren't mean to me…Bya. It wasn't like that. You just didn't show your emotions, because you had too much pride…and because you had to act that way as part of being the leader of our division…and your clan. You're beautiful, being all open and showing your feelings, but I'm worried that if you do that in front of other people, they won't understand. You scared the shit out of Rukia."

"I…scared her?" Bya said, blinking, "How did I scare her? I didn't threaten to hurt her. I wouldn't do that. Was it because I threw the pillow at her?"

"Yeah…no…I don't…know how to explain it. Look, you obviously remember how you acted before. Maybe you should just…be like that again."

The noble's eyes became sad and he let go of Renji and placed his hands in his lap.

"I'm sorry, Renji. I didn't mean to cause any trouble. You can go if I've made you upset," he said softly.

"I'm not upset. I just…want you to be okay…understand?" The redhead asked.

"And by 'okay' you mean…not telling people how I feel?" Byakuya asked, his voice growing softer.

Renji looked into the pretty, dark eyes and his heart ached. He pulled the noble close and kissed him gently on the lips.

"I guess because of whatever happened, you don't like being that way, but Bya, I think you have to hide your emotions sometimes or you are going to get hurt. I don't want you to get hurt. That's all."

"I won't get hurt with you here, Renji," Bya said, kissing him, "You're stronger than me. You won't let anyone hurt me. I knew that even before…"

"Before…" Renji mused, "so you know what you were like before…and you know you changed after the attack. You remember everything, right?"

Bya nodded.

"So…maybe this is just an affect of the attack and it will wear off. But while you are like this, I think I should stay close to you. Maybe if I do the talking and you are more quiet, people will be less likely to think you're acting odd."

Byakuya sighed.

"Okay…I'll do whatever you say, Renji. I trust you…with everything. I know you wouldn't hurt me. You stopped wanting to hurt me a long time ago."

Renji smiled sadly.

"Yeah…I did."

"And you fell in love with me?" Bya asked, leaning against his shoulder again.

"Yeah…I did that too."

Byakuya nuzzled closer and closed his eyes. Renji rested his face against the top of the noble's head and sighed softly. He tried to tell himself it would wear off…that Byakuya would be himself again soon.

But he wasn't all too sure that was how it was going to be…

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya sensed the change in the reiatsu around him and frowned. Incoming hollows…and a lot of them. He looked down at Senbonzakura.

_Sen…be ready to do battle. There are a lot of them. If they find us, I don't know but that I will likely be needing ban kai strength._

He found it odd that the spirit in his blade didn't answer.

_Sen…_

The hollows moved closer.

_Senbonzakura…answer me at once!_

He felt no connection, no sense that the soul still remained. His lips thinned and he looked in the direction they were coming from. He raised his reiatsu and was relieved to find that, while he had no use of his zanpakutou releases, he still possessed his own innate powers. He could still protect himself…but he needed to get to where he would not be seen. He masked his reiatsu and moved along to the top of a nearby ridge to see better. The group coming wasn't huge, but it was enough to overpower him if he didn't have use of his ban kai.

He knew better than to tackle them head on…

Instead, he scanned the area calmly and found several caves nearby. He chose one that seemed to be empty and moved towards it. Gaining the entrance, he peeked inside, then entered. He froze for a moment as a large green creature rose up in front of him. He caught his breath and drew his sword, remembering. But as fierce as the other one had been, this one merely squealed in fright and bolted out the cave entrance. Byakuya watched as it disappeared over the ridge and shook his head, confused. He turned his eyes back in the direction of the incoming hollows and knew he had no choice but to wait. And waiting…he knew he would require sleep. The only way to sleep safely, was to raise a reiatsu cage. He set the boundaries and raised the cage as the hollows closed in. The walls of the reiatsu cage shut him away from his pursuers…and it hid its own reiatsu. He could watch out of the front of the cage, but not be seen. And when they arrived, he realized that it was a good thing he had concealed himself. There were several strong Arrancars in the group. There was no doubt in his mind that if they had found him, he would have either been killed or made their prisoner. He had been lucky.

Byakuya settled down to rest, hoping that his luck would hold.


	3. Seeking Safety

**Chapter 3: Seeking Safety**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**You belong to me…and wherever you walk, I am with you, whenever you are lost, I will find you. Always, I am here for you…you need only breathe my name and I am yours.**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

Bya shifted and turned onto his stomach, as Renji gently untangled himself from the sleeping Captain's body, stood looking down at his moonlight drenched form and bent to kiss him lightly on the forehead. His face looked beautifully dreamy and the moonlight made his body glow as if lit from within. He reminded Renji of the book that he had seen in the living world…the one about what the living folk called angels.

But despite his wanting to stay with the lovely Kuchiki heir 24/7, someone had to stay on top of the work overflowing at the division…

So Renji stole another glance at his captain sleeping peacefully in the hospital bed, then he turned and left quietly, so as not to disturb him. As Bya continued to sleep, he moved and turned uncomfortably, a chill of fear moving through him as he laid suspended between levels of sleep.

Bya opened his eyes and found himself alone in the hospital bed. He sat up quickly, looking around, searching the room for any sign of Renji. The redhead was inexplicably gone.

"Renji?" he whispered, his voice shaking.

He wondered why Renji had left him alone. Something inside him told him that it wasn't safe for him to be alone.

He sensed something…

Holding his breath, he slipped out of bed and made his way to the window. He looked out at the bright, pretty stars and the large, blue tinted moon and shivered softly. The streets below looked quiet and calm, but Bya's senses picked up the presence of something lurking close by.

Lurking…and watching him…

He pressed a pale cheek to the cold glass and looked down in the direction of the sixth division. He could see that the lights were on and imagined that Renji had merely gone back to do some catching up. As usual, his vice captain was taking care of things while his captain healed. Still, he couldn't help but wish that Renji would return. Bya hated the darkness…and hated being alone even more…and together, the two were swiftly becoming unbearable.

Because in the dark, he couldn't see everything…and it would be easy for someone or something to hide and blend in somewhere that Bya couldn't penetrate with his eyes. And without his own powers, the only real protection he had was his vice captain.

He flinched at a strange scratching sound that came from outside the window and backed away slowly. His heart raced and his body felt cold all over. And Bya recognized that feeling. It was the feeling he always seemed to experience right before something would try to kill him. He felt the bed against the back of his legs and stopped for a moment, hardly daring to breathe. A soft whimper escaped him as he saw what could have been a shadow from one of the trees outside bending in the breeze.

Except that everything had gone deathly still and quiet…

Bya turned and ran for the door. And whatever had been hiding itself in the darkness, decided suddenly that it was time to stop lurking. A dark shape rose up and blocked out the moon and stars. Bya cried out sharply as the window shattered and something shot across the room, grabbed him and threw him back against the door. A hard, clawed hand covered his mouth so that he couldn't scream and the creature's other hand reached for the light switch. Bya was nearly blinded when the lights came on…but as his vision cleared, he looked up at the one who held him and his eyes flew open wide.

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji looked up in surprise as a hell butterfly fluttered into the room and hovered in the air in front of him.

Vice Captain Abarai, please report to the fourth division at once…see Captain Unohana for further information.

He was on his feet in an instant, dashing out of the sixth division office and flash stepping back to the fourth division. Hanatarou met him at the door and led him back to Captain Unohana's office. He saw the worry in her eyes and felt a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Captain Unohana, you wanted to see me? The message seemed urgent. Is this about Captain Kuchiki?"

"Actually yes," said the healer, "I'm afraid that he has had some sort of setback."

"What happened?" Renji asked quickly.

"We thought he simply had a bad dream. He woke and started screaming, so the evening attendant went in to calm him. Unfortunately, he seemed then to be taken by a night terror."

"Excuse me, what was that?"

"A night terror," the healer repeated, "You see, a dream is usually easily broken and the dreamer will come awake and quickly realize that he or she was merely dreaming. In a night terror, the dreamer is trapped in the dream, and though he or she may sit up and open their eyes…even talk some, they're not awake.

Captain Kuchiki was gripped by a night terror. His eyes opened and he was obviously in fear for his life. And although he is without his powers, he remains very strong. The attendant assisting him was injured when Captain Kuchiki tried to free himself…and because of that, our procedures required us to induce unconsciousness and to place him in our psychiatric ward for evaluation."

"Oh my kami, is he all right?" Renji asked, his face paling.

"He is resting more comfortably now. And I will take you to see him, but first, you must meet with his cousin. You see, because he is the leader of a noble clan, such an act requires that the clan council be notified. Their head of council, Nori Kuchiki came and gave us permission to conduct a full analysis."

"And what did you find?"

"That is what we are gathering to discuss. Rukia and Head Councilor Nori are in the waiting area just outside the psychiatric ward. They asked that you be included, as you seem to be on good terms with Captain Kuchiki and that is likely to be a factor in his treatment and recovery. So, if you will come with me, I will take you to them."

Renji followed Captain Unohana down several hallways and through a guarded healer's station, then into the waiting area. His heart thumped uncomfortably as he realized that Rukia had been crying and the Kuchiki head of council wore a deep, concerned frown.

He moved to Rukia's side, placing his arm around her as Captain Unohana began her explanation.

"Thank you all for coming here so late at night. I would not have called you, but Captain Kuchiki's situation and our rules require it. We have completed our analysis of Captian Kuchiki and have concluded that he lacks the mental fitness to care for himself."

"What?" Renji objected, "He's not crazy…I mean he may have been more emotional, but he didn't attack anyone before…and the attendant was trying to restrain him while he was still having this night terror. That doesn't make him crazy!"

"Vice Captain Abarai," Captain Unohana said calmly, "We did not come to this conclusion based on his attack on the attendant, but the fact that after the night terror was ended and he woke again, he still insisted that there was someone or something after him. We searched his room carefully and checked the hallway monitors around his room. No one was in his room with him…or lurking around it. Still…he insists that there is someone nearby who is going to hurt him. Oddly, he confirms that what he experienced was a dream, but he claims that it is more than a dream…that someone is really out there and going to attack him."

"But that doesn't mean you have to lock him up!" cried Renji, "just because he's scared like that. I mean…he hasn't been the same since that hollow attacked him. Of course he's afraid."

"Vice Captain Abarai," said Head Councilor Nori quietly, "We don't want to believe this any more than you do. We obviously want our clan leader to be returned to good health. Despite his penchant for breaking clan rules, our council respects his power and his leadership capabilities. Yet, these have been affected by his condition. We must find a way to restore him. Captain Unohana says that since his injury, he has focused greatly on you. He seems to trust you and he wants to have you near him. We believe that if anyone might be able to get through to him, it would probably be you. He keeps asking for you."

"But…what can I do?" asked Renji, frowning, "I mean, all I was doing before was staying in his room with him and talking to him."

"Since the night terror, we have barely gotten him to speak to anyone at all," said Captain Unohana, "And after the analysis, he became afraid that we would use anything he said as a reason to keep him locked up. He does not trust us."

"Renji," said Rukia, tightening her hand on his arm, "We think that if anyone can help Nii-sama, you can. We don't know anyone else he seems to trust."

"So," said Head Councilor Nori, "Our council has voted to name you as his guardian attendant until we know what path his recovery will take."

"So," said Renji, "What does that mean? I stay here with him?"

"Actually," Nori said calmly, "Our council prefers that he be released and allowed to return home to Kuchiki Manor. Unfortunately, because he injured someone here, we are required to have proof of guardianship…someone to be responsible for him while he recovers."

"S-so, I would go and…stay with him?" Renji asked.

"Yes," said Nori, nodding, "You would stay with him and attend him wherever he goes. You should keep him close to home as it could be embarrassing for him…and for our clan…if he were to be seen acting oddly in public. You must attend him at all hours and sleep in the attendant's recess in his room until such time as he regains his senses. It is a great responsibility, Vice Captain Abarai. I am afraid that you would have to take leave from your work at the sixth division for the duration of his recovery."

"Well," Renji said slowly, "It's what Captain Kuchiki needs to get better, right?"

"We believe so," said Captain Unohana.

"And how does the captain commander feel about our division functioning without its two senior officers?" asked Renji.

"He has been informed by our council," explained Nori, "And he said that he would rather lose the two of you temporarily than to lose Captain Kuchiki permanently. You will recall that he was good friends with Ginrei Kuchiki, Lord Kuchiki's grandfather and our former leader. You have his full support."

"And you want me to do this?" he asked Rukia.

Rukia nodded and rubbed her teary eyes.

"If you don't help him, then they'll have to keep him locked up here," she said, starting to cry again, "And if Nii-sama stays here, then he isn't going to get well, Renji!"

Renji tightened his arm around her and kissed her on the forehead.

"Hey," he said softly, "Don't worry. I want to help him. I just wanted to be sure it was what my best friend thought I should do."

Rukia wiped her eyes and smiled up at him.

"You should go and see to Nii-sama's release. I hate him being in restraints like that. And…" she said, glancing at Head Councilor Nori, "I've never seen Nii-sama cry before…not ever. I'm really scared for him, Renji."

Renji turned and put a hand on each of her shoulders, then squeezed gently.

"I'm going to get him out of here," he promised, "and I will make him well again."

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji opened the door to Bya's room and stepped inside, stopping at the soft, sniffling sound that caught his attention as the door closed behind him. He approached the bed where the noble lay restrained and felt his heart sink when he saw the shattered expression on the normally proud and stoic face. Tears stained his cheeks and his hands twisted within the soft restraints. Renji moved forward and the dark, tormented eyes met his warily.

"Renji?" Bya whispered, blinking, "You came back?"

The redhead stepped forward and released the noble's restraints. Instantly, Bya was in his arms and sobbing silently into his shoulder.

"I heard there was some trouble. You want to tell me what happened?" Renji asked, sitting down on the bed and holding Bya against him.

The noble didn't answer right away, but burrowed deeper into the redhead's embrace, shivering. Renji wrapped an arm around him and ran the fingers of his other hand through Bya's soft, black hair.

"I know I had a night terror, but Renji…they won't believe me that someone was really there. I saw a shadow…and I felt it. But they said that I can't sense reiatsu without my powers, so I couldn't have really sensed anything. They think I'm paranoid."

"Yeah? Well they're idiots."

"What?" said Bya, blinking away his tears, "You mean…you believe me?"

Renji laughed softly.

"Of course I do…and I'll tell you why. I've been your vice captain for a long time now. And one thing I've learned about you is that…when you sense something, you don't always sense it through the use of your shinigami powers. You have very strong instincts…and I think that is what set off the warning bells in your head."

"But Renji…I don't know who it is. I don't know why anyone would want to hurt me. I just know someone's there…watching. I know it sounds like I'm being paranoid. I know why they think I'm that way. But I also know I'm right."

"Well, I think I can help."

"How?" the noble asked, tears rising in his eyes again, "They said I had to stay here until I regained my senses. Are you going to stay with me? I guess that would be better than being here alone…"

"But you want to go home."

Bya nodded.

"I hate it here. I was thinking maybe I should just tell them it was a mistake. Maybe I should just say what they want to hear…and they'll let me go home," he said softly.

"You are going home…today."

"I am?" Bya asked, looking confused, "But the healers said…"

"Those hacks don't know shit. Your elders decided that it would be better for you to be secluded at your manor…with me to stay with you…to be your guardian attendant. It'll be my job to make you comfortable and to keep you out of trouble…if that's possible!"

A look of hope flooded the noble's soft features and his face regained some of its color.

"You're going to stay with me?" he asked, brightening.

"Yeah," Renji said, nodding, "The head captain gave me a leave of absence so I could focus on helping you get well. But you will have to stay close to home…take care of yourself…oh, and if you beat up on anyone else, make sure you only hit me!"

"Renji," said Bya, nuzzling beneath the redhead's chin, "I wouldn't hit you! You're my only friend…"


	4. Monster

**Chapter 4: Monster**

Renji placed a hand on Bya's arm, stopping him just short of the entrance to the manor. The noble gazed at him curiously as the redhead tried to consider how best to explain what was needed.

"Look," he said, taking a slender hand in his, "You know that I like you exactly the way you are, right?" he asked.

Bya nodded.

"Of course…that's what you told me already. Why would I not believe you?"

"Well…because…I also have responsibility for bringing you to your senses…and part of doing that is making sure that you don't surprise people with your behavior. Your staff, here at Kuchiki Manor, expects you to act a certain way. I don't understand everything they expect…"

"Oh," said the noble, wide-eyed, "You want me to be stern with them? Is that right?"

"Well…I think that if you are this different so suddenly, they won't be prepared, so it's good for you to change more gradually so it won't be so noticeable."

Bya blinked.

"Hmmm."

"What?" Renji asked.

"Well…" said the clan leader, "I'm kind of confused."

"That goes without saying," smiled Renji, "but tell me, what confuses you?"

"You do," Bya said, studying him closely, "You say that the elders want you to bring me to my senses…but then…you just told me to show my changes more gradually, so that others would be more likely to accept them. How is that 'bringing me to my senses,' Renji?"

The redhead's eyes widened and he caught his breath in realization.

"Sounds to me more like you're trying to bring _them_ to their senses, ne?" the Kuchiki heir said, smiling slyly, "Not that I mind, Renji, but you really should say what you mean, or you might be misunderstood."

Renji stared at him and shook his head slowly.

"Shit!" he said softly, "You may not be like I remember you, but you are still too damned smart…"

"Arigato," Bya said, releasing his hand, "So…stern."

"Yeah…don't smile at them. You always frown…no, not that angry…yeah, more like that. It will be hard for you not to smile once they start talking to you, so maybe I should do the talking and you can…I don't know…just act like you're weary and just want to rest."

"But I'm not tired, Renji…I'm actually quite hungry."

"Yeah, fine, I'll have them get something for you."

Bya nodded.

"Okay, stern…like this?"

"Just like that," Renji said, nodding, "and stand up straighter."

"I _am_ straight!" complained the noble.

"No…you usually stand straighter…with your shoulders back more."

"I'm going to look like I have a metal pipe lodged in my ass, Renji!" Bya said, pouting.

"Exactly…hey, I'm sorry, but it's what they're used to…"

Bya frowned at him cutely.

"And you say my council and all of these people actually _prefer_ me this way? That's so _stupid!_ Who in kami's name would _want _someone to be such a…a…a priss!"

"Come on, Bya…oh yeah, and I have to call you 'Captain' in front of them."

"Okay, Renji," Bya said nodding, "but…Renji?"

"Yeah?"

"Just so you know…It's nice knowing you just want me to be myself. At least someone does…"

Renji stepped closer, wrapping his arms around the noble, kissing him several times.

"Bya…just 'cause I think it's only right you should know…I loved you before. I loved you then as much as I love you now."

Bya's eyes widened.

"B-but…I was so _mean_! And…and Renji, you…never said anything!"

Renji lowered his eyes. Bya stared for a moment, then his face fell.

"You didn't say anything because you were afraid I wouldn't like you back."

Renji kissed him again and held him tightly against a warm shoulder.

"It doesn't matter."

"I would have liked you back, you know. I know that…but…I don't think I would have been able to tell you. I was…really mean, Renji."

"No," Renji said, brushing the stray hairs away from his face, "You were really obligated."

"I'm still obligated," said Bya, kissing him again, "but I don't care about all of those other things as much as I care about you. I love you, Renji…and I don't care what anyone says or does. I am not giving you up…not _ever_!"

Renji sighed softly and held him close for a moment longer. Then, he gently disentangled himself and motioned towards the door.

"Ready?" he asked.

Bya nodded and the two moved forward. Bya stopped at the door and lifted a hand to knock. Renji caught his hand lightly and lowered it.

"Your house, Captain. Just…walk in."

"Oh yes," said Bya, rolling his eyes cutely, "I just…oh, never mind."

He took hold of the handle and opened the door. As they stepped into the entry, a solemn looking woman appeared.

"Welcome home, Lord Kuchiki," she said, bowing.

Bya held the stern face for all of a moment, then stepped forward, smiling and staring.

"Noa," he said, touching the scarf she wore, "that is lovely! You made that, didn't you?"

The women looked confused, surprised and flushed, all in turns. She stared at Bya for a long moment before clearing her throat.

"Ah…yes, Lord Kuchiki, I made it with the help of my daughter."

"Marisa," Bya said, continuing to smile, "she has learned much I think. You are very talented."

"A-arigato…Lord Kuchiki…I ah…will inform the staff of your arrival. Do you have any particular wishes for dinner?"

"Hmmm," Bya said, his eyes bright, "Something very spicy with lots of noodles. Renji loves noodles…oh, but make his not spicy…and be sure he has a double portion of dessert. Renji is fond of sweets. And is Rukia here?"

"R-rukia…oh…Rukia left a message that she was called to a mission in the living world. She send her apologies."

"Oh," said Bya, his eyes turning sad, "and I was so looking forward to seeing her."

"Ah," said Renji, tugging on Bya's arm where the housekeeper couldn't see, "me too. But we'll see her soon. Come now, Captain, you said you were weary…_remember_?"

"Oh!" said Bya, catching himself, "Yes…I'm _awfully _tired. Let me know when dinner is ready. Come Renji, let's go to our room."

"_Your_… "

"Ah…_my_ room."

Renji half dragged him down the hallway.

"What_ was_ all of that?" he asked, exasperated, "I thought you were going to be stern!"

"But…she had on a new scarf…and did you _see_ it? It was _beautifully_ made, Renji. It wouldn't have been polite not to notice!"

"Yes…but didn't you see her face? You just scared the shit out of her!"

"W-wait!" said Bya, stopping short, "I _scared_ her? By being polite? Renji…I was a monster before…wasn't I? I was just…_beastly_!"

"No…" Renji sighed, slipping an arm around him, "You were noble."

"Hmpf," huffed Bya, continuing down the hall, "Same damned thing if you ask me!"

"Bya…don't swear."

"Why not?"

"Because when you do that, you kinda sound like me. And it's not proper."

"Renji?" Bya sighed, stepping into his room, "Do I _ever_ get to be myself without having to apologize for it?"

"Yeah," Renji laughed softly, "when we're alone."

The redhead caught his breath sharply as the door slammed shut and he was dragged across the room and thrown down onto the bed. Bya's body landed roughly on top of his and the noble's mouth found his and promptly invaded it.

"Wh-wha…" Renji managed between kisses.

"We're finally alone!" Bya said, kissing him again, "We can have sex now, Renji."

Slender hands attacked the knot at his waist as the noble's hungry mouth bit down on his throat. Warm, eager hips thrust into his and Renji felt the heat in the noble's loins. He stared up into Bya's beautifully riled features and felt a jolt of guilt. He caught the lovely face in his hands and gazed at him regretfully.

"R-renji, what's wrong?" Bya asked, his eyes beginning to darken, "Y-you do…want to have sex with me…don't you? You said that…"

"I know," Renji said, kissing him gently, "I love you…and believe me…I am really…incredibly…_painfully_…tempted. But I am here to help you recover from the hollow attack. And think about it, if you eventually go back to being the way you were…how will you feel if I disrespected that person I knew by taking advantage while he was weak."

Tears rose in Bya's eyes.

"So that's what you think of me?" he whispered, his voice trembling, "You think I'm weak? I know I don't have my powers…and my zanpakutou left me…but, Renji…you made me feel like I was strong _anyway_…until just now."

Renji froze, staring.

"Bya…that's not what I meant…"

"I could understand the rest of them thinking that," Bya went on, choking on the words, "but I thought that you were different. Renji…you_ saw_ me, even when I was trapped inside that mean person that I used to be. You _knew_ I was there! And you are the only one who seemed to like me the way I am now. I…I loved you for that. B-but I didn't know you only treated me like that because you thought I was weak and couldn't take care of myself!"

"Bya, that's not…"

"Leave me _alone_!" the noble hissed, turning away.

Bya pulled free of the redhead and stood. Tears broke free of his eyes and ran down a face that expressed deep hurt, but still somehow managed to look proud. His lips parted, as though he wanted to say something more, but then it closed again and Bya disappeared out the garden doors.

"Bya! Captain…wait!" yelled Renji, flash stepping after.

Bya crossed the garden so fast that it sent the petals from the sakura trees flurrying in his wake. He burst out the back gate and onto the forest trail. He left the trail and darted into the trees, soft, broken sobs bursting from him as he ran. He heard Renji trying to follow and moved faster, his lithe form flashing between the trees at a reckless pace.

"Shit," muttered Renji, "He has no fucking powers, but managed to hang on to that brutally fast flash step! Huh, just my luck."

Bya angled up a long hill, then shot down the other side, crossed the trail and headed for the edge of a cliff near a large waterfall.

"Bya, stop!" yelled Renji.

The noble pushed his flash step even harder. He had nearly reached the edge of the cliff, when he realized that a dark shape had risen out of the bushes ahead of him and was moving to intercept him. Bya broke off, but continued to slide forward. The creature rose up, producing a wickedly sharp, jagged sword. As the noble reached him, he swung the sword down. Renji gasped and shot forward as Bya's flash step engaged and the noble launched himself, not away, but directly at the creature.

"Bya!" Renji screamed.

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya woke from the odd dream he'd been having, with Renji's voice still ringing in his ears. He shook his head to clear it and peered out of the reiatsu cage. Seeing no hollows outside the cave and sensing none around, he opened the cage and slipped out, still carefully concealing his reiatsu. He realized suddenly that he was not alone in the cave. The green hollow had returned and had likely been asleep until he emerged. Now trapped and unable to escape, it cowered in the corner as Byakuya moved forward and drew his blade.

The creature squealed and curled into a ball and Byakuya found it difficult to believe that a hollow with such cowardice and such abysmally low spiritual pressure could have attacked him. He wondered briefly if it was a gender based disparity…or if some were born powerful and some were not. In any case, the hollow he faced was no kind of threat to him and it would be a waste of effort to kill it…not to mention, he would be risking discovery using his powers like that. Instead, he sheathed his blade and left the cave. He climbed to the top of a ridge and carefully reached out with his senses. He found the direction of the nearest base and started in that direction, managing his speed carefully, so that he would have a reserve of energy if he was attacked. As he traveled forward, he recalled the battle with the other green hollow…the one having such strong spiritual pressure…that had attacked him with a spirit scythe that apparently transported him deep into Hueco Mundo. He wondered at that. Certainly, it took him out of the battle and inconvenienced him, but it didn't eliminate him. He wondered if the technique was only used when the creature felt it was no match for its enemy…that instead of engaging…it used this to escape hopeless battle. He wondered at the fact that the two creatures looked exactly the same, but one was highly dangerous and one was not.

He continued walking and pondering until he sensed a change in the reiatsu around him and flash stepped into a cluster of rocks. He peered out from behind them as the reiatsu grew. After several minutes, a small group of cloaked figures appeared. They stood close together, talking softly.

"I saw him go this way. He has to be close."

Byakuya peered through the darkness, trying to decide if they were shingami or hollow.

"Well, what have we here?" said a gruff voice.

Byakuya rose up and blocked the man's hand as it attempted to smash a rock down onto his head. Immediately, the other men stiffened, then seeing Byakuya draw his weapon, flash stepped forward, drawing their own swords.

"Desert Dwellers!" Byakuya spat, "You are only going to die. Leave now and I may spare your lives."

"Get him!"

Five swords flared and released, all sending their attacks at him at once. Byakuya stood firm as the attacks descended on him, using his reiatsu alone to stop them all. Power exploded around him as their attacks shattered and threw sand in all directions. The Desert Dwellers stood staring as the man they had attacked reappeared, unhurt and flash stepped towards them. Without another word, he cut them down, leaving their bloodied corpses lying in the sand. He turned away, hastening his step as he realized that he had been sensed. There was no time, he realized, to raise a reiatsu cage. There was only time to run…


	5. Interpretation

**Chapter 5: Interpretation**

"Bya!" Renji screamed, flash stepping forward.

Bya launched himself at the hollow as its sword slashed down, the noble's slim form somehow turning in the air and evading the attack before striking the creature with a heavy assault of kicks and punches that sent it careening towards the edge of the cliff. The stunned beast recovered itself and disappeared down the cliff face as Bya threw himself over the edge and made his way down using five nearly hidden touch points on the cliff face. He landed on the ground and turned as the creature slashed at him again and Renji soared down, perched on the back of his skeletal snake. He angled his zanpakutou towards the two, but couldn't engage the hollow with Bya so close to it.

"Bya, get out of there!" he yelled.

The noble didn't even look back at him. As the hollow slashed at him, he launched himself into the air and, using a midair twist Renji knew he had to have learned from Yoruichi, he brought his slender body around and delivered a sharp blow to the creature's head. Renji's heart sank as the hollow's eyes glowed red and he felt its reiatsu rising sharply.

He recalled the skeletal snake and sent his shikai roaring across the space between them as the hollow released a scathing cero and Byakuya spun and flash stepped away.

"Get out of here!" Renji yelled, "Damn it! You don't have to do this. I didn't mean it the way I said it!"

"Screw you, Renji!" the noble yelled back, launching himself at the hollow again and capturing the creature in a firm headlock.

The beast squealed and slashed at the noble with his claws, tearing into Bya's flesh and drawing a clipped cry of pain. He grabbed the beast's own claw and used it to slash the hollow's face, then tore away as the creature threw itself down and tried to pin him to the ground. The two grappled briefly, then Bya gained the upper hand and held the hollow down, pummeling its face and upper body with a barrage of fierce strikes. Amidst the ferocious assault, the hollow screeched and drove its claw upward, sinking it deeply into the noble's crouched body. Bya screamed in pain as Renji swept past on his skeletal snake, dragging Bya into his arms and soaring back towards the manor.

"Don't worry," he said, leaning over the bleeding noble and opening his shihakushou, "I'll take care of you…"

He was stunned when Bya gave a hard, angry cry and struck out with a fist, catching the redhead across the face and knocking him down onto his back. Despite his bleeding torso, he managed to hold the stunned vice captain down and to deliver a heavy strike to the abdomen. Renji howled in pain and brought up his hands in self-defense as Bya's body held his down and the noble's furious face moved in close to his.

"Don't you _ever_ call me weak again, Renji, do you hear me? I didn't train with Yoruichi Shihoin all those years so I could learn to paint my nails. I learned Hakudo…and it doesn't require much spiritual pressure. I could snap your neck if I wanted to…and even without my powers, my body can withstand more than yours!"

"Okay," said Renji placatingly, "Captain…I get your point. Just…let's go back to the manor and heal up. We should also alert the house security. It looks like you were right about something else too. It was that hollow you sensed."

Bya nodded, sitting back and watching with flickering eyes as Renji sat up and rubbed his bruised cheek.

"It's the one that attacked me…in Hueco Mundo," Bya said softly, "It's following me."

"Following you," Renji repeated softly, "I wonder why. You sure it's the same one?"

Bya nodded.

"I'm sure of it…"

"But what I don't understand is why. I mean…it was a battle in Hueco Mundo. Why would he follow you after that? He did seem determined to kill you, but that was just because you were two enemies facing off in battle. Stalking you like this…it doesn't make sense. Makes me wonder if it was put up to it or something. But why would the ones in Hueco Mundo specifically target you now?"

He broke off as Bya sagged and fell forward. Renji caught him and eased him onto his back.

"He got you pretty good, didn't he."

"Don't go there, Renji…" Bya said warningly.

"Aww, take it easy, Bya. I said I was sorry. Don't be mad at me anymore, okay? I took it back. You're not weak. No one who was weak could have faced off against that thing with no powers like you did. You made your point, but as you've so clearly proven here, even strong people get hurt sometimes. Lie down and let me heal you."

Bya didn't answer, but lay still as Renji placed his hands over the deep abdominal wound and infused it with gentle healing energy.

"Damn…this is deep. We should go to the healing center and have it looked at."

"No," Bya said softly, "I won't go back there, Renji. I would rather die than see those people again. They thought I was crazy. They still think I'm crazy. I'm not. I'm just…different now. Why can't anyone understand that?"

"Well…I think people weren't expecting you to change so suddenly. That's not saying it isn't a good change. I mean, it made me able to talk to you about how I feel about you. I couldn't have done that before. You and Senbonzakura would probably have shredded me!"

"But Renji," Bya said, flinching as the redhead continued to heal the abdominal wound, "what good did it do, really? You may talk about how you feel about me, but it doesn't change the fact that you won't have sex with me. You get nervous just kissing me…if you really wanted me, then you wouldn't let anything stop you…"

Renji leaned over Byakuya and brushed the hair out of his eyes.

"Listen to me," he said, leaning forward to kiss him, but missing as Bya pulled away, "I didn't say that I wouldn't make love to you, but we have a ways to go before we can do that. I mean, it's kind of like having to get used to each other all over again, because you are not the person I remember…"

"No," sighed Byakuya, taking on a worn, defeated look, "I'm not who anybody remembers…or wants, apparently…"

"Bya, don't say that. It isn't true."

"Sure…okay…whatever," the noble said, turning his head to look out over the expanse of the Seireitei below the skeletal snake.

He said nothing more as Renji finished the healing and bandaged his midsection, then brought the skeletal snake down in an open area in the gardens. Bya slid down off of the snake and walked slowly back to his room. He undressed in silence and climbed into bed, still not speaking as Renji left for several minutes, then returned with hot green tea. He didn't touch the tea, but set it on the nightstand and turned onto his side to look out the garden doors. Renji sat down on the edge of the bed, following his gaze.

"So," the redhead said quietly, "What would you like to do tomorrow?"

Bya said nothing in return. Renji studied him for a moment.

"Bya…It isn't going to help to sulk."

The noble sighed.

"I of all people know that," he said in a low voice, "and you should learn the difference between a temper tantrum and someone with an actual problem."

"You're still angry."

"It isn't anger, Renji," Bya explained quietly, "Anger implies the hope of resolution. There is no hope of that here. I am stuck like this…with my heart telling me one set of things and everyone around me telling me that my instincts are wrong. The problem is that as long as I listen to my heart, I will be considered 'crazy.' I will only be considered 'well' if I do as people expect. How crazy is that?"

Renji reached out and pulled him into a warm embrace. The noble settled his head on the redhead's shoulder and sighed softly, closing his eyes. Renji slipped his fingers into the dark, silky hair and stroked it lovingly. He felt the noble's fingers tighten slightly, but oddly, he didn't attempt to intensify the moment by kissing Renji or touching him in any way. It was unusual considering the noble's overwhelming interest in pursuing sex with him before. Renji found his sudden withdrawal worrisome. He slipped a hand under noble's chin and lifted the gray eyes to meet his. The weariness and hopelessness in those eyes worried Renji even more.

"Bya," he said softly, "Just so you know…I do love you…like this or not like this, you are still the man I love. I know you're thinking that because I won't make love to you that I am rejecting you. I promise you, that's not it. It's just that your elders are expecting me to help you recover…and if we start having sex and they find out…they would probably make me leave. You would be alone without even a friend. I hate the thought of you being alone…that's all. So I'm trying not to get sent away from you…understand?"

The dark, sad eyes met his squarely.

"Yes, Renji, I understand," he said defeatedly, pulling away and lying down again, "Please leave me now. I'm tired."

"But dinner will be here soon…"

"I'm not hungry."

"But you were starving when we got here," objected Renji.

"I'm just tired now," Bya insisted, "Leave me."

Renji sighed and got up from the bed. He walked out the garden doors, closing them behind him. Bya remained in the bed, silent tears running down his face.

_Even Renji still thinks there's something wrong with me. Why doesn't anyone like me the way I am? I was awful before…and I knew I was being awful, but I felt it was my duty to be that way. But those things that stood in my way before…they don't mean anything now. I can't be a captain if I don't have any powers…nor can I lead my clan. I have become useless. That's why no one likes me this way. _ _I thought that Renji loved me…and he still says he does…but he thinks there's something wrong with me being this way too. He's just too nice to say so. But I don't want to stay here and just have people being nice to me because they don't know what else to do with me. There must be someone somewhere who could love me for who I am. The longer I stay here trying to be someone I no longer resemble, the worse things will be. I cannot serve my clan or the Gotei 13. I am useless to my king. There is nothing left for me in this place._

He climbed out of bed and moved into the dressing area, tying his hair back into a ponytail, slipping into a plain shihakushou and searching briefly until he found his gigai that had been made to conceal his spiritual pressure from enemies while on living world missions. He left the dressing area and walked to his desk and picked up a small, jeweled dagger that bore the Kuchiki family crest on the hilt. Extending it in front of him, he gave the command to open his personal senkaimon. He paused for a moment, enjoying for one last time, the comfortable feel of Renji's reiatsu. His eyes blinked closed, sending a tear down one porcelain cheek. He was going to miss Renji horribly, but Renji couldn't help him. No one could help him. He was as alone as he had always been among these people…the only difference being how strongly he felt that loneliness now.

He sniffed softly and brushed the tear away, then stepped through the open gate. As he passed into the precipice world, the manor and Renji disappeared behind him. He walked through the dark, lonely passage, forcing himself not to cry and not to turn back. His heart pounded softly with something that felt like fear, but he wasn't sure why he felt so afraid. He was sure no one had sensed him leaving…and the hollow he would sense if it came near…so, he didn't know what it was that made him quiver inside like that. He had just convinced himself that the feeling meant nothing when a shadow detached itself from the darkness and a tall, blue haired hollow stepped into his path.

"Well," he said, smiling so his teeth showed, "What have we here? A shinigami covering up his spiritual pressure? You have to be, right? No one that weak could even pass through here. But it makes me curious. If you are hiding your powers…why would you be doing that? You on a mission?"

"Out of my way, hollow. I am a messenger. I have no useful powers that would interest you."

"Hmmm," said the hollow, his eyes glinting softly, "That may be true…but it may be a big…fat…lie. How am I to know?"

He stepped closer.

"I imagine that the only way to really know is to attack you. If you are telling the truth, then I have myself a tasty shinigami morsel. If you are lying, I have a good fight to make me hungry enough to eat my tasty shinigami morsel as soon as I kill him!"

The hollow launched himself at Bya, snarling. The noble stood perfectly still as the beast closed in on him, then at the last moment, flash stepped and slashed with the dagger. Blood leaked onto the hollow's skin and it began to laugh.

"Oh ho! So the little shinigami messenger thinks he can defeat me, eh? That's funny. You have no powers at all, do you?"

He turned and launched himself at Bya again.

"You have no powers, but you think you can defeat Grimmjow…the sixth Espada. Heh, that _is_ funny! Damned funny! You know, maybe I won't eat you right away, _messenger_! Maybe I'll just spend some time having you entertain me. You ought to be good for a few laughs and a good, hard fuck, ne?"

Bya flash stepped and spun, scoring another slash and making the Espada growl furiously.

"I am not afraid of you, fool!" snapped Bya, holding up the dripping dagger, "What I lack in power, I make up for in speed and fighting skill. Come at me again if you wish…but do not expect me to go down easily. You will lose. And in the end, the one who will be fucked is YOU!"

Grimmjow flash stepped suddenly and Bya was taken off his feet and swiftly pinned onto the ground.

"Think so, sweetheart?" said Grimmjow, licking Bya's pale throat, "cause I don't see that happening. I mean, you've got nothing to fight me with…and pinned like this, sex is the only weapon you have left. Why don't you see if you can use that pretty little body of yours to lure me off guard."

Grimmjow grunted in pain as the noble shifted suddenly and drove a knee into his groin. His grip loosened and the dagger slashed across his face. Bya tore free and rolled to his feet, holding the bloodied dagger defensively and backing away. Grimmjow stood, holding a hand to his bleeding cheek.

"You little bitch! You are going to…"

"Grimmjow," said a soft, bored voice, "what are you playing at?"

"Fuck, I was just having some fun," the Espada said in an annoyed tone as Bya used the distraction to flash step away.

The tall, pale hollow next to Grimmjow sighed and lifted a hand. Blue-green light formed around a fingertip and a cero exploded outward and down the long corridor. Grimmjow stared as the shinigami's shadow appeared in the path of the cero and dove aside as it struck the rock all around, causing a massive cave-in.

"What was that about?" Grimmjow asked, frowning.

"It was about not wasting time. Come, Lord Aizen awaits us."

Shaking his head and glancing back over his shoulder at the demolished tunnel, he shook his head and followed the other Espada.

"Do not concern yourself," Ulquiorra said softly, "He will be swept away with the rest of the garbage when the cleaner comes through."

The two Espadas disappeared into the darkness.

XXXXXXXXXX

Bya heard the retreating footsteps and leaned against a fallen rock, his heart racing.

_That was close…too close. And it proves that what Renji said is right. I am weak. I am no match for these creatures. The only place I can belong to now is the living world. Without my powers, I'm not really a shinigami anymore anyway._

He pulled free of the fallen rocks and climbed to his feet. Brushing the dust from his shihakushou, he turned in the direction of the living world and passed into a park. He dropped down lightly and hid behind some bushes as he put on his gigai. Slipping out of the bushes, he looked around. People walking through the park continued to move past him as if he wasn't there. Children played nearby and friends laughed and talked together. He watched quietly for a while, then started to walk away.

"Hey," said a warm, familiar voice, "Byakuya…what are you doing in town?"

Bya turned and met the friendly brown eyes of Ichigo Kurosaki. He knew he should simply act as he would have before, but despite the fact that he had always looked down on the substitute shinigami, the one thing he knew was that Ichigo cared about his friends. And not being a captain or clan leader as he had been, he might be able to act differently…and Ichigo might be able to accept him.

"You look like you got a little beat up on your way over. Why don't you come to Urahara's place and you can clean up and have some lunch, okay?"

"That is a kind offer, Ichigo Kurosaki…but I do not wish for anyone to know I'm here…including Rukia and Renji. Is there someplace else we can go?"

"Uh…sure. My place is probably no good, because you'll be found there as soon as Rukia or Renji come busting in…but no one usually hangs out at my thinking spot. No one even knows about it. We can go there."

"That will be fine, thank you."

He followed quietly as Ichigo turned and led him away…across town and into another park, where he passed into the clusters of trees until he reached one that looked out over the water. Byakuya climbed into the tree and moved onto the platform Ichigo had built there. He sat down and leaned back against the tree, looking out over the river in front of them.

"So…I'll go get us some food and I'll be right back. Wait here, Byakuya."

"Wait," Bya said solemnly, "First, give me your word that you will not tell anyone I am here."

Ichigo blinked.

"Uh, okay…if that's what you want. Look, are you sure nothing's wrong?"

"Just keep your word and tell no one I am here."

"Okay," said Ichigo, "I'm not going to say anything. I'll be right back."

He turned and dropped down to the ground. He started back across the park, but stopped to look back at Byakuya. The noble sat with his back against the tree, but now his legs were drawn up and his face was buried in his arms, set on top of his knees. He was either extremely tired or…could it be, he wondered…

_Is he…crying? That's not possible. It is Byakuya, I know it! But I've never seen him cry before. I wonder what the hell happened to him! I should probably tell someone, but I did give my word that I wouldn't. I'll get that food and try to talk to him. Maybe…if he's out of sorts like this, he might actually deign to talk to me. Not that he ever has before. He's one of the most closed off people I know. But he seems pretty beaten down right now. He needs a friend and I think it's only right to be that for him…He may not be the warmest person, but obviously, he has a heart somewhere inside…and it looks like someone tore it out and handed it back to him. I wonder what happened? And why he doesn't go to Renji. Renji's his vice captain…and from what that knucklehead said…they were starting to be more like friends. Why wouldn't he turn to Renji? Or Rukia?_

He pushed the thoughts aside and flash stepped away, leaving the silently crying noble alone.


	6. Shadowed

**Chapter 6: Shadowed**

Renji yawned and stretched, wondering briefly if Bya had fallen asleep yet so that he could go and fall asleep in the attendant's recess. He would have liked to fall asleep in his captain's arms, to be as close to him as he had been while Bya was in the hospital, but it would only be like teasing the confused noble.

Although it no longer seemed to Renji as though Byakuya was merely confused…

No…his behavior since returning to the manor had been sulky and frustrated. And confusing him by holding him, but refusing to have sex with him would have been unfair. He didn't want to tease Bya…or to hurt his feelings…his pride…but he had to first figure out what had happened to his captain…and he was obligated to do what he could to help undo it. And that was it, really. If he was successful, then the beautiful, emotive Bya would disappear and Byakuya would return.

He thought about his handsome, solemn, closed off captain…as he had been before the attack. And Renji loved that man with all of his heart. But he loved the sweet, vulnerable Bya as well. And both were 'Byakuya,' just one was Byakuya before the hollow attack and one was Byakuya after the hollow attack. His heart, he found, didn't differentiate between the two. And maybe, he thought, that made some kind of sense…because even though his captain had been closed off, Renji had sensed the softer, more gentle side of him for some time. At times, it was almost as though Bya lived inside him and peeked out every so often…just to let Renji…Renji alone, know that he existed inside the stern, quiet noble. That, he thought, must be why even though he knew that Bya's behavior was confusing to others, it wasn't as confusing to him. He had seen signs of it often enough. So maybe the hollow attack had stripped Byakuya of his ability to submerge this beautiful, childlike personality that lived and breathed beneath his, that struggled against him to give him depth of heart and conscience, which Renji knew beyond a doubt that he had…

So seeing that side erupt and take over was, in a way, a dream come true for Renji. He finally got to see his usually reserved captain responding to that deep emotion as though he could not contain himself. It was what he'd secretly wished he could see…even if just once…and not even permanently. Yes, he had to be honest and admit, he was made breathless seeing Bya this way.

But he wasn't going to take advantage, even though it seemed that Bya wanted desperately for him to do so. It wouldn't, he thought, be right…although he could definitely imagine it. He had tasted the depths of that beautiful, perfect mouth quite a bit since the noble's injury. He knew now how good it felt to hold that lovely, strong body close and to touch and stroke the delicate, pale skin. He felt a stirring in his loins just feeling the memory inside himself. But despite that desire, he wouldn't do more until he felt convinced that it was the right thing to do.

He sighed heavily and moved to the garden doors, checking to make sure the unhappy noble hadn't locked him out…but really that wouldn't have made sense. Bya wanted him there…it was only that Renji had deeply hurt him by saying he was weak the way he was now, and by refusing to make love with him. He didn't really want Renji to stay away…so he slipped through the doors and crossed the darkened room.

He stopped halfway across as his mind connected with the odd fact that Bya's bed was empty. A cold feeling moved through Renji as he scanned the bedroom around him, then finding nothing, went on to search the dressing area, bathroom and the attendant's recess. Unnerved, he opened the inner doors and found the guards posted as ordered after the hollow attack.

"Has Lord Kuchiki passed through these doors tonight?" he asked.

"No sir, he has not," answered the guard solemnly.

Renji went back inside the room and closed the door.

Damn! He didn't leave by the other doors either…which means that he used the family senkaimon to gate out of the room! But why? Where was he going? What was in his head?

But sadly, what was in the noble's mind was painfully clear to Renji. Having been made to feel disrespected and unwanted, he had fled the manor.

_Where would he go? He would want to be where the ones who know him couldn't find him easily, but close enough to home that he could find help if he got into trouble. He probably went to Karakura Town…at least, I'm going to hope he did! If I move quietly enough, I can get him back here without the council knowing he got out…otherwise, I think they'll fire me as his guardian, if not just killing me on the spot!_

He shook his head worriedly, then left the room and informed the guards that no one was to enter Lord Kuchiki's room until the master opened the doors. Hoping he hadn't made them suspicious, he left the manor and raced to the central senkaimon to cross over into the living world.

_Bya…be careful. I don't want anything bad to happen to you…_

XXXXXXXXXX

Bya didn't plan to eat much, but he hadn't eaten in a long time and for some reason, being in the living world always made him feel hungry, restless, alive inside…even before…

He looked over at Ichigo, who was eating and at the same time, observing him quietly. He knew the youth had plenty of questions to ask him and wondered why he waited.

"Aren't you going to start asking me questions?" he queried finally, "Your face tells me that you are curious."

"Hmmm," said Ichigo, biting into an apple, "I think I'll let you decide what you want to tell me. You probably have enough people asking you questions…"

"How did you know?"

Ichigo smiled.

"You look like Byakuya, but you don't act like him. Your expressions…the way you move…the things you have said to me so far are about as un-Byakuya-like as they could be. The little but of reiatsu there is around you says that you are him, but even if you are, you have been affected somehow. I'm hoping you'll tell me what happened, but I'm leaving the ball in your court. Why don't you tell me what you want to…and we'll go from there."

Bya sighed softly and closed his eyes.

"I was at the shinigami base in Hueco Mundo. While there, I encountered a huge, green hollow that wielded a red spirit scythe. It struck with it and I lost consciousness. I woke in the fourth division with massive internal bleeding and with my personality changed. It was noticed by everyone that I was acting differently and the council of elders asked Renji to care for me and to see to my recovery. Obviously, they want me back the way I was."

"But something in your eyes tells me that's not what you want," Ichigo said softly, "Am I right?"

Bya nodded.

"I just…I know I'm not the person I used to be. I have no powers, so I can't be their captain and clan leader…and even though I know I always tried to follow the rules and codes before, I just can't seem to make myself do that anymore. And I don't know why, but it hurts me that they don't want me as I am. They are my family. It makes sense to see that even though I was mean before, I was also powerful and I could protect the clan and serve usefully in the Gotei wouldn't want that, ne? But Ichigo, I still want to be accepted this way. I mean, what if I never go back to being who I was before? What if I never regain my powers? What then? I know they'll have to choose a new clan leader…and replace me in Squad Six. It does hurt to think of that, but it hurts less than it does knowing they don't like me now that I'm like this."

He sighed and met Ichigo's gaze with stormy, troubled eyes.

"Ichigo, the worst thing is, that the one person who has stood by my side all through this, Renji…I told him I loved him…that I had loved him for a long time, but I just couldn't admit it. And at first, Renji seemed really happy. He became my boyfriend…but then, even when I got out of the hospital and went home, he wouldn't…_be_ with me…sexually. He said he wanted to but…"

Ichigo smiled at him and nodded in understanding.

"He was clumsy, but then that's just Renji," the youth commented affectionately, "I think that Renji wanted very much to make love to you, Byakuya."

"What? But then, why didn't he?" asked the flustered noble, "If he loves me…and loves me this way, why won't he show it like that?"

Ichigo sighed.

"He's thinking about what will happen if you two are caught by that stuffy council of yours…or about what happens if your condition is temporary and you change back and can't be with him anymore. Byakuya, Renji has a heart…a really big, fat, beautiful one…but I think you know that."

"But then, why…?"

"He's afraid," Ichigo said quietly, "He's afraid of giving you all of himself and then facing rejection…if your condition is temporary, understand? He's not trying to be mean to you…he's just protecting his heart so that it doesn't get broken. I've seen him broken-hearted before and, let me tell you, he was a mess…"

"Who broke Renji's heart?" Bya asked, pale faced.

Ichigo lowered his eyes and didn't answer. Bya stared for several long moments, then caught his breath softly.

"It was _me_? I hurt Renji that badly? When? Ichigo, what did I do?"

"It doesn't matter…"

"Yes, it does! It matters to me. I know I was mean before, but what did I do that hurt him like that?"

"You should let him tell you," Ichigo suggested, "I don't think it would be right to say it without his permission."

"Please Ichigo," Bya said, his eyes going wide and desperate, "I have to know…because if you don't tell me, then how can I show him how sorry I am?"

Ichigo bit his lip, thinking.

"Huh…well…maybe I should tell you. There was a night not to long ago when he came to Karakura Town. He told all of us here that he was finally going to tell you how he felt about you. He found this restaurant at the top of the hill, overlooking the river and he convinced the owner to let him use it for a night. We helped him decorate it and we prepared a really nice dinner…and he waited for you to arrive…"

Bya put a hand over his mouth and tears filled his eyes.

"It was my birthday," he whispered, a horrified expression taking over his features, "I didn't come because I got too busy at work. I was so stupid! I actually said that Karakura Town didn't require my attention and he should take care of things there, himself."

Ichigo said nothing, but gave him a look of sympathy.

"Hey, you didn't know…didn't intentionally hurt him."

"Ichigo," Bya said in a soft, wounded voice, "We both know what probably would have happened if I had shown up…poor Renji."

A tear slid down his face.

"Ichigo…I think I was awful before. But why is it that now that I am nicer, no one likes me? Even Renji…"

"Whoa…just a sec. Remember that up until a few days ago, you were a different person. You changed…but no one knows if this is how you are going to stay or not. Everyone around you is kind of like Renji. They like you plenty, but they are scared that you'll change back just as suddenly. You may be sad that they act that way, but…you _can_ kind of understand…right, Byakuya?"

Bya nodded silently, brushing the tear off of his face and sniffing softly. Ichigo studied him for several minutes as they ate without talking. Finally, Ichigo looked up at him and smiled warmly.

"What?" said Bya, looking mystified.

"Well," said Ichigo, "I was just thinking. I don't know about everyone else, but I think you being this way could be a really cool thing. I mean, even if it doesn't last, you're like this now, right? So you should enjoy it…do some things you normally wouldn't."

"But…what if I change back and I am angry about it?" Bya asked, frowning.

Ichigo laughed merrily.

"Byakuya…you act like I should be afraid of you like they are!" he chuckled, "I beat your ass!"

"Hey!" Bya objected, his eyes flaring, "Just remember that you only beat me because of your hollow powers!"

"I still beat you," laughed Ichigo, "but see…it's a good thing, Byakuya. It means I can have fun with you and I won't be worried about what will happen, see? If you come after me, I'll just fight back."

Bya put a hand over his mouth to stifle a sudden laugh at the thought. He was smiling and feeling happy now, but his heart wavered slightly. He bit his lip and frowned, considering.

"What is it?" Ichigo asked.

"Um…" said Bya uncertainly, "Just…so you know. I _do_ consider Renji to be my boyfriend…"

"Oh…is that all!" Ichigo laughed, "Well, don't worry…cause I have a boyfriend too. Kisuke is my lover…has been for a long time. Not many people know. We try to keep things private, but just so you won't worry about me making passes at you. You _are_ cute, Byakuya. I can see why Renji's head over heels for you…but I have someone, so you're safe with me."

"And you don't think Renji will be angry if he finds me with you?" Bya asked.

"Well…maybe for all of five seconds, cause of how crazy he is about you, but no…I don't think he'd be jealous…especially if we invite him to join us for the fun. We could get the gang together and just have a really fun day. Then…even if you change back, you know that just for once, you got to relax and enjoy life. So let's do it, Byakuya. Let's make tomorrow the most incredible day of your life!"

Bya felt an odd, gripping sensation as the sheer joy of Ichigo's words passed over him, leaving him helplessly laughing and half-crying at the same time. He threw himself into the youth's arms, hugging him as hard as he could.

"Arigato…thank you so much, Ichigo!" he whispered, "I knew you would understand. Renji is really lucky to have a friend like you."

"Hey," said Ichigo, pushing him away playfully, "So are _you_!"

Bya's smile widened until he thought his face would crack.

"Okay," he agreed, "In the morning we find the others and we have fun together…for just one day…"

"Yeah," said Ichigo, enjoying the rare sight of Byakuya actually looking happy, "For just one day."

XXXXXXXXXX

Bya came awake suddenly, his senses prickling. He lifted his head and looked around. Ichigo slept quietly a few feet away and everything seemed quiet.

Too quiet…something…

He heard the soft crunch of feet stepping on dry leaves, then sensed a flash step. He held his breath and crawled to the edge of the platform. Looking down, he saw nothing that would have triggered his fears in such a way. He moved closer to Ichigo and touched his arm silently. Ichigo came awake instantly and would have spoken if not for Bya's hand over his mouth. The youth nodded to show he understood and Bya carefully removed his hand. The two looked all around the trees and peered into the darkness, studying the ground below. They waited for nearly a half hour, barely drawing breath and looking out into the night.

Bya had nearly dozed off leaned up against the substitute soul reaper, when a sudden flash step and a sound of surprise from Ichigo brought him awake. He gasped softly as Ichigo was somehow yanked free of him and sent over the edge of the platform. Bya turned and found himself face to face with the green hollow. He tried to strike out, but the creature had gotten too close and took hold of him, lifting him into the air and terrifying him into silence with it's deadly gaze. There was a long, terrified moment, then the beast struck. A sharp, clawed fist drove itself deep into the noble's chest, then tore free. Blood exploded around the two and Bya's body went limp in the hollow's grip. The beast stared into his eyes as the noble looked up in horrified silence, his blood flowing rapidly out of him and down the hollow's arms.

"You are dead," a rasping voice told him, "and now I will be made whole again…"

"Listen you _bastard_!" Ichigo's voice said suddenly, "You put him down…_now_!"

The hollow growled and threw Bya down from the platform. Ichigo dove down and managed to catch him before he reached the ground. He turned back to see the hollow leaving.

"Son of a bitch! But if I go after him, then…"

He shook his head in frustration and turned toward Urahara's shop.

"Don't you worry," he told Bya, "Orihime and the others were staying at Urahara's tonight. She can heal you…so just…don't die, okay?"

Byakuya's head dropped onto the youth's shoulder and his hand tightened slightly on Ichigo's arm.

"That's right," said Ichigo, "Hang in there."


	7. What Matters

**Chapter 7: What Matters**

Renji burst into Urahara's shop and ran past Tessai without so much as a 'hello.' He flash stepped to the entrance to the training ground and flew down the ladder, into the room below. Rukia paused in her training with Orihime to look up at him in surprise.

"Renji!" she said, looking worried, "What happened?"

"Has Bya…Byakuya come here?" Renji asked quickly.

"Nii-sama?" Rukia said, "I thought he was at the manor with you! Renji, what happened?"

Renji let out a defeated breath.

"I didn't mean to, but I hurt him."

Rukia's eyes widened and her frown deepened.

"Renji…what do you mean you hurt him? How did you hurt Nii-sama?"

"I just…I insinuated that his 'condition' had made him weak."

"Baka! Why did you say something so stupid!" Rukia yelled, smacking him in the head.

"OW! Dammit, that hurts!" Renji yelled back.

"All right kids," said Urahara, shaking his head, "Do I have to send you two to your rooms?"

"Kisuke!" Ichigo said, sweeping down the ladder and landing in the middle of the training room, "I need Orihime!"

All eyes turned to the limp, bloodied body the substitute soul reaper held in his arms. Rukia blanched and put a hand over her mouth.

"N-ni-sama!" she gasped.

"Bya…" murmured a stunned Renji.

Orihime stepped forward as Ichigo laid the bleeding shinigami down on the ground.

"I'm here, Ichigo!" she said quickly, falling to her knees beside Bya and activating her healing powers.

A golden oval rose over Bya. Ichigo, Renji, Rukia and Kisuke knelt at Orihime's side as she worked.

"Ichigo…" said Renji in a shocked tone, "What the hell happened?"

"I ran into him on the way to Kisuke's shop. He was acting kind of strangely and seemed depressed…not himself. So I took him to a quiet place where we could eat something and talk. We ate and talked for a while…and he told me about the green hollow that attacked him in Hueco Mundo and how afterwards, his personality was so different. He said that the reason he left was because…"

"It was my fault," Renji said, lowering his eyes, "As soon as Captain Kuchiki woke, I knew something was really wrong. He was way too emotional and even though he seemed to be trying to contain it, he showed everything. And right away, everyone started acting like there was something wrong with it, because, let's face it, he's Byakuya Kuchiki…the cold, powerful Kuchiki clan leader and Squad Six Captain. We all knew him…and we knew this wasn't like him at all. The healers thought that his mind was affected by the attack and we all expected he would 'go back to normal.' But the thing we missed was that when he changed…he knew he was different and he didn't care. He liked being more free to express himself. He couldn't understand why no one seemed to like him that way…why everyone seemed to intent on making him as closed off as he used to be. What made things worse was that he admitted that he's been in love with me for a long time. You guys know that I've been crazy about him for a long time, too. I might even have felt that he loved me back, but he almost never showed a thing. Then all of a sudden, after the attack, he showed me everything…and everything I had dreamed of having with him started to become reality. But the thing is…I couldn't act on it. I couldn't show him everything I wanted to, because I knew that if he returned to the way he was before, he would feel I had dishonored him. So…I held back and it hurt him. Add to that, the fact that I referred to how he is now as 'weak' and he just couldn't take it anymore. He left because he was in too much pain over not feeling loved and accepted. He was finally able to be the kind of person he wanted to be…and he was rejected by everyone…at least, that's what it seemed like to him. Isn't that right, Ichigo."

"Yeah," Ichigo said softly, "That's what he told me. I told him that it wasn't that people didn't like him as he is now, but that they're worried about acting in a way that would anger him if he went back to being the way he was. He seemed to calm down after that…and I told him that if he wanted, we would spend today together…doing all of the things he hadn't been able to before."

"What?" said Rukia, "Ichigo…Nii-sama would…"

"Rukia," Ichigo said, stopping her, "I know it's not what you're used to, but think about this. Byakuya told me that he knows what he was like before. He's aware…and has always been aware of these desires and has suppressed them."

"For good reason, Ichigo. My brother is…"

"Without his powers…freed of responsibilities and wanting to feel alive. I understand honoring his responsibilities, but I think it would only be right to give him this. If he doesn't go back to being like he was, he will be relieved of his responsibilities and we can lower our guard with him more permanently…and if he does go back to the way he was, I think he will appreciate the fact that we cared enough about him that we wanted him to have that one really great day of being himself…the way he would be if not saddled with all of that responsibility. We can protect him from dishonor…I don't know…maybe have him wear a gigai so we are the only ones who know it's him. But while protecting his image, we also should let him know we love him as is…changes and all."

Rukia bit her lip and blinked to hold back threatening tears. Kisuke sighed and closed his eyes. Renji gazed at Bya silently and his hands clenched tightly. They were silent for several long minutes.

"I think Ichigo's right," Renji said finally, "because, whatever he might have been like on the outside before, I think we are all aware that he was different on the inside. He never liked the fact that his being a clan leader and a captain meant that he had to hide who he really was. And I don't care if he never said so, I know he appreciated the ones who sensed the person he was inside and loved him for that. I don't think that what hurt him was so much how the healers and higher ups and Kuchiki elders reacted to him. The ones who hurt him were the ones of us who had broken through and begun to respond to the person inside…the one he wished he could be, but had to deny because of his nobility and status. Now, everything else has been stripped away and Captain Kuchiki can't do anything to conceal who he is. I don't think it's asking too much to give him one day away from his responsibilities. Cause it's something he would never feel he could do…but I think even the man he was would understand that it's a gesture of our love…our respect for who he is inside. Like Ichigo said, we can safeguard his honor by making sure others don't recognize him…let him have his fun for just one day without the weight of all of that responsibility."

Rukia sighed.

"I think you two are right…but I also think we have to be really sure that we safeguard his honor by making sure we are the only ones who know about this. Kisuke…you _can_ make a gigai that will hide his true identity, can't you?" she asked.

"Yeah," said Kisuke nodded, "That's not going to be the difficult part. The difficult part is going to be keeping him alive. Poor bastard barely had any spiritual pressure left after the attack in Hueco Mundo. This really devastated his systems…"

"He's going to be okay," said Orihime firmly, "I am going to make him okay. It will just take some additional time."

Rukia smiled sadly and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Thank you, Orihime," she said softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya woke and found himself facedown in the sand in a lonely desert valley. He sat up slowly, trying to remember falling.

_I was running from the Espada…and had only just managed to slip into this place unseen, when…_

He strained his mind and vaguely remembered pausing and putting a hand to his chest.

_That's right…there was an awful pain there…so intense that it made me collapse. I don't know how that happened…what it was. I am lucky that I wasn't discovered._

He touched the area of his chest that had been the source of the pain and found it very sensitive to the contact.

_It's so strange…I imagine that something had to have hit me…_

He strained his mind and caught his breath sharply, remembering the odd dream his lapse into unconsciousness had produced.

_It was that creature again. It attacked me in that place…and told me I was dead._

He held his hand to the painful place on his chest and breathed slowly. Uncertain what he should do, he scanned the area for the distance to the nearest base. He had had to move away from the base to elude his pursuers, so some time had been lost. He longed to keep walking, but sensed that his body would not tolerate it well without rest. Sighing in annoyance, he raised a reiatsu cage. He leaned against the side of the structure, staring out at the dark, gloomy desert and thinking of how good it would feel to reach the base and wash all of the sand from his skin.

_I have sand in places I would rather not think about, I am aching for a good meal and I think that Renji has probably given up on searching for me by now._

He felt a soft twinge inside when he thought of Renji, but forced it away immediately. It wasn't good, he thought, dwelling on things he shouldn't desire…and would never be able to have. No…it was better to force it away…to make it disappear. He could bury himself in trying to stay alive…into returning home, resuming his orderly, disciplined life. And by doing that, he could avoid letting Renji into his mind. Because if the redhead invaded his mind, it was only a short step from there to his heart…

_And my heart has only ever been breached by one person. I think that was warning enough. I cannot expose that part of myself that is so weak. Never again. It is better to have a quiet, orderly existence guided by rules that are clear. Strong connections are dangerous. Because no matter how much you love someone…you cannot know it will last. And after feeling the weight of losing Hisana, I never want to be so vulnerable again. It would be irresponsible. No, I will not think of Renji in any way but as my subordinate. I will not make myself that weak for someone again…_

But even as he tried to push the thoughts away, he felt invasion of that person in his mind again and knew that while pushing Renji away had been easy on the outside, it had already cost his mind and heart a large amount of peace…and might cost painfully more, if he wasn't cautious.

Suddenly, being lost in Hueco Mundo as he was didn't seem like such a weight to bear…

Because he already knew what Renji would be like upon seeing him alive and well.

And while he knew he would brush off the sentiment, he didn't relish doing so.

But he _had_ to do it, and he had to do it coldly.

Because to not do so would make him look weak.

And as a clan leader and squad captain, he couldn't allow that.

Not ever…

XXXXXXXXXX

Bya felt the return of pain to his chest and groaned discontentedly. He opened his eyes and suffered a moment of dizzying confusion, trying to remember exactly what had happened and how he had ended up in a strange bed. He felt arms curled tightly around him and turned his head to find Renji looking back at him with tear filled eyes and a stricken expression.

"Renji…" he said, trying his voice and finding it only trembled a little, "Renji, what happened? How did I get here?"

But he was already beginning to remember…

_That hollow! It…_

He put a hand to his chest and closed his eyes.

_It…impaled me. It said I was dead…and I thought I was. I was scared, because I found myself in Hueco Mundo…running from Espadas. And I couldn't tell…if it was real and I had died and gone there…or if it was a dream._

"Bya," Renji said in a choked voice, tightening his arms around the noble, "I almost lost you…"

He stared back at Renji in confusion.

"I almost…died?" he asked softly, his fingers playing over the bandages on his chest.

Renji nodded, but couldn't find his voice.

"Then…"

"Orihime managed to heal you…but there was this moment…when…when you stopped breathing…and your heart wasn't beating. You started to fade…"

"That must have been when I dreamed I was in Hueco Mundo," mused Bya.

"You dreamed about Hueco Mundo? Were you remembering about the attack?"

"No," the noble went on, furrowing his brow, "I was trying to reach the southeast base…"

"The southeast base? That's about as far from home as you can get."

"And I wondered if I was there because I had died and become a hollow…but I wasn't a hollow. I was still myself…"

Renji shook his head.

"Yeah, it must have been a dream. We've only been out that far a few times…and you've never been alone there."

"No," admitted Bya, frowning, "Never."

Renji slipped his fingers into Bya's tumbled hair and pulled him into a kiss. The noble frowned more deeply, making the redhead draw back and stare.

"What," said Bya, "because I got hurt, you feel sorry for me, and now you're going to…"

"Hey, give me a break, will you? You scared me to death, Bya! If you want to get revenge for stupid things I say, go ahead and hit me! But…don't…scare me like that…"

He paused and ran a finger along Bya's frowning lips.

"And don't go running off like that again!"

"Oh," said Bya, catching his breath, "I must have gotten you in trouble with the council. I'm sorry, Renji. I didn't think about the trouble I'd make for you."

"The…trouble? The council? Bya," Renji said, hugging him tightly, "I don't give a shit about that stupid council. And I don't care about the inconvenience. The only thing that was in my head when I found out you were gone was getting you back in one piece!"

"And you figured I couldn't take care of myself. I'm weak, I know. I proved it pretty conclusively…"

"Baka!" snapped Renji, his eyes flaring, "Don't you get it, Bya! It's not that you're weak! That hollow? That thing that keeps trying to kill you? It hurt you badly enough when you had your powers, remember? It cut through Senbonzakura and you as though the two of you were made of water! It doesn't matter how strong you are! You have to use all of your intelligence, battle knowledge and skills to defeat it. Powers or no powers, you have to outthink and outmaneuver it. But you can't do that alone…and don't think I'm just saying that because I think you're weak! I would feel the same if you were at full power and that thing was after you!"

"Because you love me," Bya said softly, reaching up to touch the redhead's riled face.

Renji didn't ever remember being disarmed so easily…not even when he had been the strong and brooding Byakuya, with his power flaring around him and Renji had barely been able to look at him without feeling the pain of unfulfilled desire. He was more certain than ever now that this person was, indeed, Byakuya…or at least, the part of Byakuya that had cut through his defenses and left him completely undone. No, it was never the overwhelming, power infused spectacle everyone else always saw, it was this more vulnerable person, who realized that power and beauty were only two aspects of a whole person…who knew that while appearances had to be kept up, part of him would always long for the things he couldn't have.

Up until the moment of Byakuya's injury, Renji had sensed that he was simply one of those things the noble longed for, but would never indulge in. Up until then, he had been without any real hope of reaching the heart he sensed buried inside Byakuya. Now that heart lay exposed on the surface. He rested in Renji's arms, completely willing to be himself, to express to Renji what he never could. Now Renji was the one who was forcing himself not to move forward…the one having to be cold, and to refuse. But, inside, his heart was crumbling. He couldn't keep refusing…looking at that lovely tormented face and trying to hold back. He couldn't hold back anymore anyway…not after Bya nearly died. He couldn't stand the thought of the one he loved being so hurt and alone as Bya was. He knew he was stepping over a line…that if he returned to being Byakuya, he would absolutely kill Renji for taking advantage.

But it wasn't really taking advantage…

It was taking care of someone he loved more than his own life…

"Yeah," he answered, smiling and kissing Bya's still frowning lips, "because I love you."

Then he buried himself in that sweet, pliant mouth until it was smiling again.


	8. If Only I

**Chapter 8: If Only I…**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**I am safe with you, walking for the first time outside of the strict lines of my life. I will run wildly, laugh readily and live until I am breathless, then I will sink into you and have lived a lifetime in only one day…**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

Bya woke early and turned his head slightly, not lifting it from Renji's chest, but moving so he could watch the redhead's face as he slept. His fingers traced lightly over the tattoos that crossed Renji's chest where his yukata opened and his breath disturbed the stray lengths of red hair that lay scattered about the area. Bya smiled and let his lips brush against one of the tattoos. Then he parted his lips and ran his tongue along a dark line. Renji jumped awake and both men sat up.

"I'm sorry, Renji," Bya said, his cheeks coloring, "I woke up and you were asleep and…"

"Hey," said Renji, smiling and pulling him close, "Don't apologize. You love me…and I love you. It isn't wrong for you to want to touch me."

"But you said that…" Bya began.

Renji's lips found his and claimed them hungrily. Bya sank into each one as though starved for them, his arms wrapping tightly around the redhead and dragging his body closer.

"I know what I said before," Renji murmured against his lips, "but I was just being stupid. I thought I was protecting your pride or doing what I had to, but really it's hard to know what the right thing to do is. I mean, I'm honoring a person who disappeared that day on the battlefield and refusing to acknowledge the one who's right in front of me…"

Bya frowned in confusion.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that you _are_ Byakuya. You are the captain who went out onto the battlefield with me and was injured. And you became the person you are now…but even though you've changed, you are still my captain…and I want to show you what I feel for you. I couldn't before, but you were a different person then. I have to act based on who you are now…and that means…no more holding back. I want to be with you, Bya. I want us to be lovers."

Bya swallowed hard and fought to contain the instant smile Renji's word brought. But the smile emerged on his lips and spread beautifully over his features, like an opening blossom. Renji stared at the lovely eruption of happiness and then all he could think of was sinking into that wonderful, smiling mouth, burying it in kisses and making Bya smile even more.

"Hey guys, time to get…" Ichigo called out, bursting through the door, "ah…oops…uh, sorry."

"That's okay," Bya said, smiling and pulling away from a frowning Renji, "We can make love _after_ we get back. Come on, Renji!"

Renji flushed and Ichigo stifled a laugh as Bya pulled the redhead to his feet and hastily started to dress. He realized belatedly that Ichigo was still in the room, then shrugged and continued to change anyway. Ichigo and Renji exchanged glances and Renji grabbed his clothes and started to change as well. Ichigo shook his head and flash stepped away. Renji handed Bya a gigai.

"Use this gigai. It is just different enough that you won't be recognized by anyone not aware you're using it. We don't want the Kuchiki elders to catch wind of this or they will fry me, get it?"

"Okay," Bya said, slipping into the gigai and turning, "How do I look?"

"Like someone who's going to have the best day of his life," Renji said, grinning.

"Followed by the best night of my life?" Bya said, moving closer and dragging Renji into a steamy kiss.

"Hmmm…" Renji sighed, "You keep that up and we're not going to get out of the bedroom!"

"I don't mind," Bya said, shoving the redhead down on the bed and dropping down on top of him.

The door opened again and Rukia skidded to a stop, staring.

"Oh…s-sorry, Nii-sama," she stammered.

Bya frowned at her, then looked down at Renji.

"We need to lock our door," he commented, "but first, I think we should teach this two time offender a lesson she won't forget!"

He picked up a pillow and hurled it at Rukia, who caught it and stared at it…then back at Bya again.

"What's the matter?" Bya goaded her with a devilish look in his eye as he picked up another pillow.

Rukia's eyes slowly narrowed and locked on his for a long moment. Then her flash step sounded and she shot across the room, bringing the pillow in her hand down to meet the one he held as he brought it up in defense.

"A nice attack," Bya said, his eyes gleaming, "but not good enough!"

He turned and swung the pillow, accidentally connecting with Renji's head and sending him tumbling to the floor.

"Renji!" Bya gasped, "Are you o…"

His words were cut off abruptly as Rukia's pillow struck him soundly, sending him over the edge of the bed and into a stunned Renji's lap. Rukia stood on the edge of the bed, glaring down at the two of them.

"What about that, Nii-sama? Was that good enough? How about THIS!"

Her flash step sounded and she swept down off the bed. Bya's pillow came up in defense, sending her off course and onto the floor. The two flash stepped madly, slamming their pillows together and striking blows that sent each off in different directions, only to turn and launch themselves at each other again. Renji ducked and dodged his way back to the bed and picked up another pillow, which he then threw at Rukia, stopping her from striking a fallen Bya. Rukia roared and drew her pillow back, soundly thumping it into Ichigo's face as he came through the door.

"What the hell?" Ichigo gasped, grabbing the pillow and chasing a weaponless Rukia.

"Kami, it's every man for himself!" cried Renji as Byakuya's pillow sent him to the floor again.

"No fair!" cried Rukia, "There aren't enough pillows!"

"There's an extra in the closet," said Ichigo, placing himself between Rukia and her destination, "if you can get to it!"

"Don't you dare attack my defenseless sister!" shouted Bya, flying at Ichigo, body tackling him and taking him to the floor.

"What the…you've gone wacky!"

"Yeah," laughed Bya, slamming the pillow into Ichigo's surprised face and disarming him, "I get that a lot!"

He tossed the liberated pillow to Rukia, only to be smacked with it a moment later.

"Well, that's some gratitude," Renji laughed, "Want me to get her for you?"

"No thanks," said Bya, pushing Renji so that he fell on the bed, "I am quite capable of defending myself."

Rukia struck the noble, knocking him down again.

"Yeah, I see that," said Renji.

Byakuya turned swiftly, grabbing her foot and pulling her down, then simply sat on her and began calmly tickling her. Rukia squealed.

"Aack!" she screeched, "How did you even know I was…"

"Hehe," laughed Bya wickedly, "A little bird told me…a cute little…red…bird."

"Argh!" yelled Rukia, "RENJI!"

"What?" said the redhead defensively, "It was back when he wouldn't have done anything about it! I didn't know he'd lose his marbles and really use that!"

"Hey!" yelled Bya, smacking Renji with the pillow, "I have my marbles. I've just lost my powers! Well…except for my flash step…"

"All-right guys," said Ichigo, "I think Urahara has some kind of little workout planned before we take off."

"KILLJOY!" yelled Rukia, Renji and Bya, all throwing their pillows at them.

"O-kay…" said Ichigo, picking himself up off the floor, "I guess we _won't_ be meeting for a workout…but we'd better sneak out the window then."

One by one, they crept out the window and quickly flash stepped away. They swept down the street and into the park, where they met Orihime, Chad and Uryu. An impromptu game of tag ensued, lasting for some time before the group dropped down onto the riverbank, breathless with laughter and exhaustion. They walked more slowly into town and to the huge shopping mall at the town's center.

"Do I smell leather?" Bya asked absently as they meandered through the mall.

Renji looked around.

"It's from that shop over there," the redhead answered.

He was careful not to mention that every time he had been by that particular shop, he had stood, staring at a lovely pair of tight leather pants that would have looked luscious gracing his captain's shapely bottom. He turned his head to look at another store, then looked back to find Bya gone and the leather pants missing from the display.

"Oh kami, I think I've died and gone to heaven…" Renji muttered, stepping into the store.

He walked to the back and waited for a few minutes, then wondered just what kind of truck had hit him as Bya stepped out of the fitting room, looking much the way Renji would have imagined he would, but even more so, smiling, and with his dark hair pulled back and some drifting down over one smoky gray eye.

"So," said Bya, "What do you think?"

"What do I think?" repeated Renji, "I would tell you, but I want you to enjoy the rest of the things we'll do today before we get to what's on my mind, ne?"

Bya loosed a soft laugh and walked back to pay for the clothes. He rejoined Renji and the group walked from one end of the mall to the other, talking, laughing and indulging in sporadic games of tag. They climbed down the long set of steps at the far end and walked into the ice skating arena.

"Have you ever been on ice skates before?" he asked, not remembering Byakuya ever mentioning it.

"No," Bya said, looking out at the ice, "Never."

Renji laughed.

"Then you probably don't want to learn from me. Maybe you could get Rukia to show you."

Bya frowned.

"Rukia can ice skate?" he asked, "I didn't even know…"

"Well, she has an ice zanpakutou. She used to freeze lakes and we'd ice skate sometimes. She was always way better than me."

Renji watched as Bya approached Rukia and the two rented ice skates and moved out into the arena. Bya wobbled a bit at first, but soon was skating forward alongside Rukia, and doing a great job of looking as though he knew what he was doing. They turned a corner together and Rukia turned and started to skate backwards in front of him. Suddenly, the lights in the arena dimmed and a slow, pretty instrumental song began to play as colored lights moved around, capturing the skaters as they went by. Bya continued to skate facing forward and Rukia caught his hands as she skated backwards, then turned and faced forward with his arms crossed and wrapped around her. She let go and spun while he skated past, then caught his hands again and fell back in with him. As they finished circling, Renji moved out and skated alongside, catching Bya's hand as Rukia let go of the other.

"Good luck!" she laughed knowingly.

"Should I be worried, Renji?" Bya asked, smirking, "You're not going to make me fall, are you?"

"Well…" said Renji, "I'm not so good at this, but we'll do our best. And if you do fall…"

"What?" asked Bya, sarcastically, "You'll try not to fall on top of me?"

"I was going to promise to catch you, but…it'll probably be more like you said…"

Renji moved in closer, slipping an arm around him as they moved around the darkened arena. As they circled a second time, Renji turned as Rukia had and moved in front of him, skating backwards. He let Bya move closer, then leaned forward to kiss him. Their lips met for one long, wonderful moment, then their legs entangled and both crashed down onto the ice. Both burst into laughter, slowly struggling back to their feet.

"Sorry," chuckled Renji, "I told you I wasn't a good skater."

"But you _are_ a good kisser, Renji. I think I saw stars!" Bya said, hanging onto the wall.

"No…" said Renji, smiling warmly, "I think that you just hit your head!"

They skated slowly back to the entrance and left the arena, moving on to the food court for lunch at a Teppenyaki restaurant, then to the park near Kisuke's for a game of soccer. They rested on the grass afterwards, looking up into the blue sky and trying to decide what the clouds resembled. As the others laughed and talked, Renji turned over and pinned Bya partway beneath him.

"Oh, be careful," Bya said, wincing, "I think I ate too much."

"Yeah," Renji agreed, "You usually don't eat that much at all."

"But I wanted to try everything!" the noble replied, rubbing his aching stomach, "Truthfully, though, I know you're right. I just never really wanted to enough to actually try."

"And I saw you eat stuff I know I never did," laughed Renji, "even sweets, which aren't your favorite."

"Yeah…because I wasn't allowed to eat them as a child, so I didn't form a taste for them. Grandfather liked everything hot and spicy, so that's what I got used to."

Bya's face took on a somber look.

"I think that most of the things I thought I liked…are just the things I got used to. There are a lot of things that I think I would like…if I tried them a few times."

"Hey," said Renji, nipping at his lips, "Don't look at me with that sad expression. You're going to make me sad."

"Sorry…it's just that…Renji…I don't know how to explain it, but I feel like there's a part of me that used to be in control…holding everything back. And whatever that was…I don't think it was a bad thing. I think it was meant to protect me. But that thing that was there…is gone. And when I feel something, it comes out. When I want to say or do something, I say or do it. But now all it does is get me into trouble. It's almost like I still need that part of myself, but I don't how to get it back. And I'm not all that sure I want it back anyway, because I felt trapped before…like sometimes people could see in, but then, whatever that was, it shut a door inside me…and I couldn't move. It overpowered me all of the time."

"Well," said Renji, "We'll just have to take one day at a time, Bya. And maybe…if that is an important part of you, it will come back. But whether you stay this way or go back to what you were like, I'm going to love you."

"And I'll love you, too," Bya said, tears coming to his eyes, "But I have to say it now…and often, because if that part of me ever comes back and I lose control, I might not be able to say it anymore."

Renji smiled down at him.

"Don't you understand?" he asked, kissing Bya again, "I heard you say it before…and I knew you couldn't say it out loud…because of your pride…you duties…your responsibilities. I don't know what'll happen, but I'm glad we have right now."

"Me too, Renji," Bya whispered, kissing him back.

"Come on guys," Ichigo called, getting up and dusting himself off, "We should head back to Kisuke's for dinner."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Bya," said Renji, picking up his plate from the table, "Ichigo and the others want to go out dancing. I know you never would have before, but…"

"Sure," said Bya, smiling, but I think that before we go, you'll have to show me a few steps, because all I've ever done is formal, ballroom kind of dancing…nothing like club dancing."

"Actually," said Kisuke, glancing meaningfully at Renji, " I think Rukia and Orihime would be better than you for that, ne?"

"Oh…yeah," Renji chuckled, "Go on to the training room with the girls and I'll be down in a minute."

Bya followed Rukia and Orihime down the hallway. Renji and Kisuke watched them go, then Renji turned to the shopkeeper, looking worried.

"What's going on? Why did you need to talk to me?" he asked.

"Well," said Kisuke, "I don't know if it's anything to worry about yet, but Bya's reiatsu is looking kind of unstable."

"Unstable? I didn't notice, but then, I suck at reiatsu sensing."

"You and Ichigo," Urahara affirmed, nodding, "In any case, if he's dizzy or shows any other signs of being uncomfortable while you're out, I want you to get him back here."

"Should we just stay here?" asked Renji.

"No…no, I think it will be fine. Just…if he needs to, you bring him back."

"Okay," said Renji, swallowing hard, "I'll do that.

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya stumbled dizzily into the base and was immediately greeted by the lead officer on duty.

"Captain Kuchiki?" said the officer, "We weren't aware you were in the area, sir. Do you need medical attention?"

"Not yet…just a senkaimon back into the Seireitei."

"Yes sir!"

Byakuya followed the officer back into the main building and to the senkaimon. He stepped forward, ready to enter, but then swayed for a moment and dropped to the floor unconscious.

"Captain Kuchiki!" cried the officer, dropping down next to him.

He leaned over the noble, checking carefully for breathing and a heartbeat. Relieved to find both, he lifted the unconscious captain into his arms and carried him to the infirmary.


	9. Lovers'Dance

**Chapter 9: Lover's Dance**

Renji slipped a hand into Byakuya's and noticed instantly, the tension in the noble's body. He turned his head to look and smiled at the piqued expression, the wide eyes and the way he seemed to want to look at everything at once. His eyes flicked from the lines of people waiting to get into the dance club, to the row of limousines arriving…to the building ahead of them that pulsed with hypnotic sounds and up to the sky, where a soft, misty rain was beginning to fall.

"This is my favorite dance club," Renji said, nodding in the direction of the building, "It's always pretty crowded, but the music is good and everyone kinda dances with everyone…so don't worry if we get separated now and again. It's all in good fun. Just try to stay close to me."

Bya nodded and pressed closer to the redhead, making his smile widen. They reached the front of the line and were waved on. Renji kept a hand in his as they passed through the doors and the music exploded through them upon their entrance into the club. They followed the others through the throng of people talking and laughing at the edges of the dance floor, and out onto the floor itself, where there music was so loud that talk was near impossible and Bya felt the heavy vibration that worked its way down inside and incited a restlessness in his slender body that was like nothing he had ever felt. The tension grew inside him and his heart raced madly inside. He wanted to ask Renji what is was that he was feeling, when the redhead's arm slid down around his body and he pulled them close together and they began to move.

The feeling was indescribable…

He rested his head on Renji's shoulder and closed his eyes, letting Renji's body move his. He nuzzled under the redhead's chin, enjoying the warm masculine scent of him, the heady throb of the music as it resonated around and through them, the feel of Renji's hands sliding down his back and curving around his bottom. It felt about as close to making love as one could get without removing any clothing. He could feel the press of sexually charged reiatsu all around them as the other couples turned and swayed, almost as though all of the bodies in the room were connected and moving in harmony with each other. He lifted his chin slightly, his lips finding Renji's and his eyes blinking as the lights flashed around them. He melted into the heat of the kiss that followed, one that sent tremors through him…open mouthed…so hard it was almost painful…so deep that it felt like they had left the ground and achingly beautiful in the way it left them clinging and only half aware. Dizziness washed over him and his body felt feverishly warm. He was both sad and somewhat relieved when the song ended and another began, this one faster, still very rhythmic, but one that made them loose themselves from each other and gave them time to breathe more deeply.

Renji grinned at him, staring as his captain's slender body moved reflexively in response to the faster music. He judged it was a sinful, wicked pleasure to see Byakuya…or at least, this incarnation of him, relinquishing his tight controls…letting go of his cares and looking so content. He laughed inwardly as the music intensified and the bodies around them turned and shifted…and began to rearrange themselves. Renji was pulled away and moved apart from the noble as the beat quickened and the new partners exchanged looks of greeting, a few hot, writhing moves, then spun off in the direction of a new partner. In the dark, under the flashing lights and hypnotized by the waves of sound, the mass of dancers didn't concern themselves with who shared their space. They were all a part of the swell of bodies and sound, all connected by the fact of sharing this space together. But, Renji reminded himself, this was also a situation in which one had to be careful not to inadvertently step on toes. He had seen more than a few fights break out before in times like this…because, caught up in the music, things could go too far, jealousy could flare suddenly and tempers could rage.

He had no idea that he was about to be the one made jealous…

He finished spinning an impromptu partner away and looked for Bya, frowning at the hunger in the eyes of the man who had captured the noble and was keeping him cornered, even as the partners around them changed and changed again. He started towards them, but was nearly taken off his feet by another partner. He looped an arm around his new partner and moved closer, then let go and flash stepped towards Bya as the man dancing with him moved in, trapping the noble between himself and the wall, wrapping his arms around, and sinking into a hot, unscripted kiss. Renji's temper flared and he flash stepped again, but stopped short of them as the man assaulting his date's mouth got a lesson in why no one kisses Byakuya Kuchiki without his permission. The body holding Bya's against the wall suddenly convulsed as the noble struck groin and face in almost the same motion. The man dropped to the floor, howling as Bya stepped sedately over him and returned to Renji's side.

"Problem?" Renji asked, grinning madly.

Bya glanced back over his shoulder for a moment.

"No…why?" he asked innocently.

"Just curious," Renji said, as the music slowed and their bodies intertwined again, "I wondered if that guy wanted to dance or just to eat you alive."

Bya smiled coyly.

"Were you afraid I'd let him?" he asked, "Don't be. I can take care of myself, Renji."

"Yeah," said the redhead, shaking his head, "I saw."

Bya's body pressed close to his again and his face burrowed into Renji's shoulder. The redhead felt soft chills run through him as the noble nudged his way beneath his collar and ran a line of kisses down his collarbone, then nipped gently at his throat.

"Ah…" the redhead sighed, "Bya…I never suspected you'd be such a damned good dancer."

Bya laughed softly against his throat.

"This isn't dancing, Renji," he said, catching Renji's eye.

"No?"

"It's a mating ritual."

Dark brown eyes met enchanting gray, curiously.

"These people are here," Bya went on, "getting themselves riled as a prerequisite for intense sexual experiences."

It was Renji's turn to laugh.

"How do _you_ know _that_?" he asked.

Bya shrugged.

"Just because I never attended a dance club doesn't mean that I don't know what they really are."

"Come on," Renji chuckled, "Not all of these people are here because they want to have sex…"

"Some want to have sex with the person they arrived with, some are looking for partners to have sex with, some tell themselves they are only here to have fun, but will end up in bed with someone unexpected tonight…a mating ritual, Renji. That's what this is…"

Renji held Bya against him, breathing in the sweet sakura scent.

"So which one are you?" he asked, loosing a hot breath onto the noble's skin, "I mean…if you don't want to…"

"I fully plan to have sex with the one I arrived with," the noble stated simply, "but I am not completely certain whether we will make it all of the way back home or if that copulation will occur before we can get there…"

Renji felt a delightful jolt in his loins and slid his hand down Bya's back, pulling their hips in tighter against each other. Bya smiled disarmingly.

"Renji," he said cutely, "I wonder if we should leave soon…before you are overwhelmed."

The redhead laughed heartily as the music sped up again and they released each other.

"Don't you worry about me," he assured the noble, "I will manage."

They moved away from each other again, their eyes touching frequently as they changed partners, danced and changed partners again. Bya turned and felt a strong arm wrap around him…a shock of kido that made his legs collapse beneath him, and a hiss of warning in his ear. He wondered briefly if this was the man from earlier, but then caught a glimpse of blue hair. His eyes widened and he tried to struggle, but was hit with another shock of kido and turned towards a back exit.

"Keep your mouth shut," the other warned him, "I've been looking all over for you. You probably thought you were safe, staying with that freak, Urahara…and maybe if you'd stayed there, you would be. But you owe me for last time. And I'm going to finish what I started…but first, you and I are going to have a little fun."

Bya shivered and a hard gasp escaped him as he was dragged into a dark alley and shoved up against a hard, brick wall. Pain exploded through his head and he barely felt the hands that moved his clothes quickly out of the way. The blue-haired hollow smiled wickedly at him and increased his spiritual pressure until sweat broke out on the noble's forehead and he could no longer move. The other's mouth bit down on his, sucking at his lips hungrily as one hand anchored him against the brick wall, and the other forced his thighs apart.

"H-how did you even know it was…me?" Bya asked, stalling and looking desperately past the other to the club door.

Grimmjow laughed nastily.

"You think that fucking gigai can fool an Espada? Think again, shinigami. I know it's you. And now, I'm going to fuck the life out of you…right here."

The icy blue eyes bored down into his, freezing him in place.

"You're going to hurt, shinigami…and then you're going to die…"

Bya strained madly against the hollow, his chest heaving.

"Let me…go!" he hissed furiously, biting the mouth that had invaded his and spitting blood at him.

Grimmjow growled furiously and slapped him hard enough that he would have fallen, if he hadn't been held so tightly. Something hit his midsection, stealing his breath, then the body holding his moved forward and in between his parted thighs. The hot tip of the hollow's pulsing arousal touched his entrance and, abandoning all pride, Bya forced out a scream. A door slammed open behind them, then the hollow was dragged away from him and he heard the heavy impacts of fighting. His head spinning, he managed to set his clothes back in order and reached up to brush the hair out of his eyes. His legs gave way, but before he could fall, an arm wrapped around him and then he was lifted off his feet.

"You okay?" Renji asked worriedly, "I saw that creep drag you out, but had to fight my way to the door."

Bya became aware of the others standing behind Renji, and the retreat of the Espada's reiatsu as he disappeared.

"I'm…okay," he managed, "but I think we should go back to Kisuke's."

Renji nodded and flash stepped away from the club, still holding Bya tightly against him. Sighing in relief, he rested his head on the redhead's shoulder and relaxed in his arms. They were back at the shop in minutes. Kisuke gave them a look of concern as Renji set Bya down and they realized just how much damage the hollow had done to him.

"Sit," the shopkeeper said quickly.

Kisuke moved in close and carefully cleaned away the blood, then addressed the cuts and bruises on his face and arms. Bya held himself still and made no sound as the shopkeeper healed him. His eyes focused on Renji's and remained there until Kisuke left them with an admonition that the noble should get some rest.

They returned to their room and Renji started the shower, while Bya slipped out of his clothes and caught his breath at the sight of the bruises that he hadn't even realized he had. Renji's lips tightened at the sight of them, and he quickly healed them, before turning Bya in the direction of the shower and joining him under the hot spray. Bya rested quietly against the redhead's shoulder.

"I imagine you think pretty lowly of me for being overwhelmed like that," the noble said in a soft voice.

Renji lifted his chin and looked into his eyes.

"What are you talking about?" he asked in dismay, "Bya, that was an Espada! Maybe you didn't notice, but it took Ichigo _and_ me to get him off you. You fought him better than anyone could expect, but come on…without any powers? You didn't really expect to beat him…"

"No…" Bya said quietly, "but I should have gotten away…"

Renji shook his head and smiled.

"Forget it. That creep won't come near you again. And if he does, you and I will whip his bony ass!"

Bya blinked in surprise.

"We?" he repeated softly.

Renji smiled at him and nodded.

"Hey…you may not have shinigami powers, but no one knows better than I do how hard you can hit a guy when he pisses you off…so I'll hold his reiatsu down and let you beat the shit out of him, okay?"

Bya couldn't quite stifle the laugh the thought of it evoked. He wrapped his arms around Renji and invaded his mouth hungrily.

"Arigato, Renji…" he whispered happily, "Aishiteru yo!"

"Aishiteru yo, Bya," Renji said between steamy, wet kisses.

He pushed the noble back against the wall, kissing him harder and sliding a hand down the slick, white skin. He tightened his body against Bya's and left his mouth to lick the hot drops of water from his throat.

"Renji," the noble hissed, closing his eyes, "Renji…I want you. I can't wait anymore!"

His breath was stolen away as the redhead lifted him off his feet and carried him out of the bathroom and laid him, still dripping wet, on the bed. He fell on the wet, pale body, attacking his face and mouth with kisses and following the curves of his body with rough, searching hands. Bya's fingers dug into the skin of Renji's back and he pushed his hips upward, seeking heat and friction.

Renji moved downward, treating the long, graceful throat that was usually hidden within the silken folds of the ginpaku kazahana no uzuginu to long, sweeping licks and heavy, biting suction. Bya gave a riled moan and his body pitched beneath the redhead's, the dark eyes threatening upheaval. Renji laughed softly and descended the lovely, white torso, lips and tongue caressing the wet skin…stopping to tease the pink nipples, scraping his teeth lightly along his lover's ribs, then sinking into his navel and sucking until at last Bya could bear it no longer. He threw his weight against the surprised redhead, turning skillfully and forcing him down on his back. Lacing his slender fingertips together with Renji's, the noble held the strong hands down and attacked mouth and throat as though starving for them, then returned the sweet torment his lover had treated him to. He lingered over Renji's navel, giving him a decidedly less than naïve look, before kissing his way down the fine red trail of hairs and releasing a puff of heated breath on his already swollen length. Keeping their eyes locked, he treated the area head to slow, deep exploration. Renji gazed down at the lovely mouth wrapped so tightly around him, the pretty pale skin, the dark, smoky eyes, half hidden beneath the tumbled strands of hair that had fallen onto his face…and wanted badly to be on top of him again, but the thought disappeared from his mind entirely as the noble's hands stroked and squeezed gently as mouth and tongue intensified his pleasure until he was nearly at his breaking point.

Feeling the approach of release, Bya released him and climbed on top of him, raising his hips, then settling slowly down again, taking in the redhead's hot length, little by little with short, teasing thrusts. Renji stifled a groan and bit down on his lip, breathing deeply and trying not to climax. Bya settled on top of him and leaned forward, lacing their fingers together again and pressing their joined hands to Renji's chest.

What he did next was nearly indescribably beautiful…

Renji gasped with pleasure as the noble shook the water out of his hair, sending a shower of now icy drops down onto Renji's skin. And as the strands of hair danced around and settled back into place, he moved his hips…slowly at first and then gradually faster and faster. Renji felt Bya's fingers tighten in his and the dark eyes glazed over. His body raged against the redhead's now, seeking that explosion of pleasure they had wanted for so long to experience together, but had never been able to.

Whether because of Byakuya's inability to justify such a shocking action…Renji's concern that hitting on his captain would only result in pain or death…nosy relatives…unexpected shyness. There always seemed to be something in the way before, but now the obstacles fell away and left the path to mutual bliss open and waiting…

Bya's head suddenly bowed, his eyes went black with intense pleasure and his lips parted into the most beautiful sounds of ecstasy that the redhead had ever heard. Wet heat pulsed onto their skin and the noble fell forward, nearly collapsing as pleasure claimed him. He cried out again as Renji's body shuddered beneath his, and seething heat filled him in sharp, powerful throbs. They finished with a torrent of kisses, neither noticing that as they enjoyed the last, dizzying twinges of completion, the door had opened and the reiatsu in the room had begun to rise.

Bya finally noticed the person standing in the doorway and sat up with Renji still buried inside him. He glared at the intruder and started to speak, then froze and caught his breath in surprise. Renji's head turned to see what had riled his lover and his brown eyes widened in shock.

For a moment, no one made a sound…

Then, the man in the doorway attacked…


	10. Opposing Forces

**Chapter 10: Opposing Forces**

Renji stared in disbelief at the stern, angry face of his captain, feeling the awful heat of the kido blast that passed over his naked body as Bya launched himself away, just escaping the huge blast that destroyed the wall behind the bed and shattered the window.

"What the…?" he stammered, pulling his yukata around him and staring, first at one, then the other, as Byakuya sent another blast of kido fire in Bya's direction, "STOP!"

Bya evaded the second blast as well, and managed to grab his own yukata as he flash stepped directly at his attacker, aiming a well-timed kick at him as he prepared to attack yet again.

"Abarai!" snapped Byakuya, "What are you doing with that…that THING?"

Bya stood outside the room with Ichigo and Urahara standing protectively in front of him and Yoruichi a step behind him. Renji stepped out of the bedroom, tying the belt of his yukata and staring at the two versions of his captain.

"I am not a THING!" Bya snapped back, shaking with a mix of fear and fury, "I don't know who you are or how you got in here, but you had best leave."

"Abarai!" Byakuya repeated, ignoring Bya completely, "I asked you a question. I have been missing for days…and I finally manage to sort myself out and return home to find that some imposter has conned his way into my home, my life…and apparently, my vice captain, as well! I want an explanation before I simply kill the both of you!"

"Byakuya!" exclaimed Ichigo, stepping forward, "What the hell is wrong with you? What makes you think you can…"

"Shut your mouth, _boy_, and go back to playing with Urahara. I am here on military business. I have the task of retrieving this imposter and taking him back to the Seireitei for questioning by the head captain and the Kuchiki council of elders."

He glared at Bya menacingly.

"What are you? Are you some kind of hollow? A demented clone? What?"

"I am _not_ either of those!" Bya insisted, "I am Byakuya Kuchiki…and _you_ are the imposter! Now, leave!"

"What is this?" Byakuya said, sarcastically, "…some kind of joke? Who besides that fool you just fornicated with would believe that you could _possibly_ be me?"

Renji's eyes flared and he had to struggle to force down his anger at Byakuya's cruelty.

"Look…Captain. I don't know what's going on. What I _do_ know, is that this man is the one who was with me on the battlefield in Hueco Mundo. He is the one who was injured…and whose side I was at afterwards. I didn't leave him for a moment after he was attacked. So…"

"_I_ was there on the battlefield," Byakuya insisted, "and after I was attacked, I was somehow transported to a location deep in the desert. It took me time to find an outpost…to get healed, and to find my way back. Apparently…that imposter somehow caused this to happen…and while I was trying to get back, he was impersonating me! Though how anyone could have been fooled by the likes of _him_, I do not know…"

"Kuchiki-san," said Kisuke in a low voice, "While I appreciate the seriousness of the situation, I don't take kindly to you destroying my shop trying to kill someone who is really quite harmless. I can guarantee you that this person hasn't the reiatsu to do anything like what you're describing. He is nearly without reiatsu…and only has a flash step. No kido to speak of…no zanpakutou."

"And yet," Byakuya intoned darkly, "all of you here immediately believed that he was me? Either he is an accomplished liar, or you are all as unbelievably stupid as Renji is."

"Hey!" Ichigo objected, "Don't just think you can come in here, breaking down walls and…"

He broke of as a blast of kido erupted from the noble's hands. It stopped short and disappeared as Kisuke stepped in between them.

"Kuchiki-san," he said warningly, "I will have to ask you to leave."

"Not without that imposter," Byakuya insisted, "I will see he is dealt with. It is a crime to impersonate a noble lord and captain. If you choose to harbor a criminal…"

"I doubt you could take on all of us," Kisuke went on calmly, "so just leave him here. We'll get to the bottom of who he is and then decide what to do with him."

"Captain…" Renji said softly, "Look…I know he broke some rules…but he hasn't harmed anyone. I don't why he might have done this…"

He stopped as a deeply wounded look crossed Bya's face. The noble looked from one to the other, then into the stern face that looked so much like his own.

"None of you believe me? Not even you, Renji?" he whispered.

"Why would they?" Byakuya asked, his voice sounding only a shade less cold, "Except for your body, you bear no resemblance to me. Now…it is time for you to end this charade and come back to the Seireitei with me. We will examine you and find out exactly what manner of creature you are."

"And I told you he's staying here," Kisuke began.

Bya shook his head and stepped past the two surprised shinigamis who had been protecting him. He stood quietly as Byakuya bound his hands with a kido spell and sealed away his spirit energy.

"Captain," Renji objected, "That's hardly necessary…"

"Vice captain," Byakuya said, his eyes flicking up to meet Renji's, "You are fortunate not to have charges leveled against you for aiding him in his deception. If I were you, I would be very quiet right now. Come. You will need to answer for your behavior as well, Renji."

Renji met Bya's teary eyes, then sagged and turned to follow Byakuya into the senkaimon. Bya turned to join them, but was taken by surprise as strong arms took hold of him and he was suddenly taken off his feet and out of the shop. He struggled against the one who held him, but was unable to break free.

"Put me down! Let go! Ichigo! Ichigo, what are you doing?" he cried.

He realized quickly that his objections were being ignored and the substitute shinigami was not going to stop until he had gotten to wherever he was going. Bya fell silent and clung as best as he could with his hands still bound, until Ichigo landed on the wooden platform where they had gone when Bya first arrived in Karakura Town. Ichigo set him down and raised a shield around them.

"He won't be able to find us here," the ginger-haired youth assured him, "and that hollow won't be able to get to you either."

He knelt next to the distressed noble and released the seal on his reiatsu, then shattered the kido on his wrists. Bya looked up at him questioningly.

"Why did you do that?" he asked softly, "because I know that you don't believe that I'm Byakuya Kuchiki…any more than the rest of them do…"

Ichigo gave him a gentle smile.

"Well…it doesn't really matter if you are or aren't Byakuya, does it?" he asked, "None of us called you a liar, Bya. We don't question that you have been telling us what you thought was true all along. But you have to admit…the one we saw was much more like Byakuya than you are."

He saw the look of hurt rising on the noble's face again and waved it off.

"Hey…" he said quickly, "listen to me. Who in his right mind would want to be that guy anyway? He's a noble lord! And he's a captain. The guy wouldn't know the meaning of the word fun if it jumped up and bit him. He has a stick rammed so far up his ass, they couldn't get it out if they tried. So you aren't Byakuya Kuchiki. That doesn't mean we think you are a liar. You told the truth as you saw it. You weren't trying to deceive anyone. You think Kisuke and Yoruichi would have protected you if they didn't trust you?"

Bya blinked back the tears, staring at Ichigo in surprise. His eyes lost the injured look they had had and he looked up at Ichigo gratefully.

"So…it isn't that anyone thought I was lying," he mused, "but that I just couldn't be him. But Ichigo…then…how did I get out there onto the battlefield? Why do I have all of his memories? If I'm not Byakuya Kuchiki, then who am I?"

"I don't know," admitted the substitute shinigami, "but I do know this. We're not going to just let him take you off to the Seireitei and lock you up. You haven't done anything to hurt anyone…and in fact, they should worry more about the fact that that hollow has been after you."

"It's kind of you to say so, Ichigo," the noble said softly, "but I don't think anyone but you and Renji…and our friends here really care about what happens to me. I'm not anyone important…just a nuisance."

Ichigo smiled and shook his head.

"You are not a nuisance. Now just…try to relax here. I want you to stay here while I go and find Renji. The two of you need to talk…and after that, we'll get you to Kisuke and he can try to figure out what's going on. I want your word that you will wait for me here, inside the shield."

Bya looked as though he wanted to argue, but then sighed softly and nodded.

"Okay…I won't leave. Just…well…never mind. Go ahead. I'm kind of worried about Renji. I…I mean…Byakuya was really awful to him. It kind of makes me wonder. Ichigo…I have all of Byakuya Kuchiki's memories…and even though I…or…he…was really stern, sometimes angry…I don't recall him attacking someone who couldn't defend himself…or being so vile with everything he said. It's kind of like the reverse of me. I say out what I feel, even sometimes when I shouldn't. That man…Byakuya…he _does_ the vile things he threatens, even when he shouldn't. I don't understand. I'm really confused."

Ichigo sighed and patted him on the shoulder.

"It will be okay, I promise. Renji and I aren't going to let him do anything to you. Now…stay here and I'll be back with Renji."

Bya nodded, then watched quietly as the substitute shinigami slipped out of the shielded area and flash stepped away. He sat down, trying not to feel afraid of having been left alone. The shield, he told himself, was sufficient protection against the hollow.

"But not the Espada," he whispered softly.

He moved in close to the tree trunk and tried to curl into the branches to make himself less visible. Sighing softly, he looked up through the branches and admired the beauty of the moon. He focused on the that and the twinkling stars that peeked through the clouds, and not to think about what was going to happen to him.

He had almost managed to put everything out of his mind, when he heard footsteps approaching.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Where is Renji?" Ichigo asked, looking over to where Tessai and Kisuke were working to patch up the damage that Byakuya had caused.

"Byakuya arrested him."

"What?" Ichigo said, his eyes widening, "Why?"

Kisuke shook his head.

"He said that Renji knew about the 'imposter' and had to submit to questioning about their activities to determine if there was wrongdoing on his part as well as Bya's. I'm telling you…this situation stinks, Ichigo. I know that Bya is too gentle to be the real Byakuya, but the guy who came in here and busted up my shop? He was a lot more extreme even…but on the darker side. I have questions about both of them."

"Well…I can take you to Bya. I put him under a shield for safety and he said he would wait for me to come back with Renji."

"Good idea," agreed the shopkeeper, "Tessai, do you mind?"

"No problem. I have this."

"Thanks," he said, following Ichigo to the door.

They left the shop and flash stepped away.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Why are you so quiet, Renji?" Byakuya asked as they passed through the precipice world, "I would have expected that although you might not have missed me, you would at least be relieved your captain wasn't killed. Before the hollow attack, it seemed you were quite loyal, even affectionate. What changed?"

Renji sighed.

"I don't know, Captain. What I do know is that you don't seem the same as the person I remember, any more than Bya did. I never remember you destroying things and trying to hurt someone defenseless before."

Byakuya shook his head.

"You have no idea how dangerous that thing could have been. For all he seemed innocent and gentle, he could have been hiding his power and waiting for the right moment to use it against you."

"But why, Captain? What would he gain? He wasn't even trying to act like you. And the whole time I knew him, he never was capable of hiding what he felt…or lying. He didn't manipulate people…and he despised that kind of behavior in other people. He never asked me for anything…not information…or access to anything. He only ever wanted to be accepted…to be loved."

"Which explains the scene I encountered upon my arrival," Byakuya said dryly, "But perhaps the point wasn't to infiltrate, but to take my strength away from the Gotei 13. Sousuke Aizen would be very pleased to deprive us of as many captains as possible. Perhaps that is what the hollow was attempting to do by transporting me into the deep desert. Maybe I was not expected to be able to escape…and this hollow left behind this gentler image to confuse others so that they would not look for me. If I had never come back…he would have eventually been accepted as me, ne? So perhaps it wasn't to gain secrets or anything else, but to delay knowledge of my absence. Perhaps other captains will be targeted as well. Did you consider that, Vice Captain?"

Renji sighed.

"No…no I didn't. Captain…I understand your anger at me for not coming to find you…and for thinking Bya was you. I just…I am really worried about him. Couldn't you just let me find him? I give you my word. I will come back and answer whatever questions you have…and I'll accept whatever punishment is decided on. But Bya is really vulnerable, and I don't want anything bad to happen to him."

Byakuya was quiet for a moment.

"My apologies," he said finally, "but no. You have more information about him than anyone else is likely to. It would make you his target if he is hiding something."

"Huh…"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Byakuya asked.

"Are you being so hard nosed about this because it's protocol…or are you pissed because I went to bed with him and not you?" Renji asked.

"I won't even dignify that with an answer," Byakuya said in a low voice.

"No…you wouldn't, would you? And if I had dared to tell you how I felt about you, you would have been equally closed off. We both know that I've been head over heels for you for years. But you wouldn't give me a second glance."

"You know why I couldn't…"

"Chapter and verse, Captain," Renji said, cutting him off, "but why you'd want me to keep desiring you when I never had a chance with you is just damned cruel. And even knowing you as I do? I never thought of you as being that cruel. I guess that I just always tried to see the best in you. But now…whatever it was that I was seeing…it isn't there anymore. It's like you've lost your human side…and when I look at Bya, I see that. Yeah…I admit that's why he got past my defenses so easily. But at least I know he won't break my heart like you did. You were always too good for me and I knew it…but you didn't need to string me along and tease me like you did. If you didn't want me, then you should have made it clear long ago. But I guess it felt good, having that power over me."

Byakuya didn't respond, but merely stared at him in the darkness of the precipice world, his eyes glinting softly. Renji's lips tightened and he turned away.

"I've had all I can take of you…and your insufferable cruelty. I'm going to him. Kill me if you want to. I don't give a shit."

To his surprise, Byakuya merely watched him wordlessly as he flash stepped away. The noble stood quietly within the precipice world, considering what to do next, then turned to follow in the direction that Renji had gone. He had gone all of two steps, when he felt a heavy shock pass through his body. His legs collapsed beneath him, but as he fell, he realized that there was no assailant. Whatever was happening, was happening inside him. He tried to crawl towards the nearest exit, but only went a few feet forward, before collapsing entirely.

XXXXXXXXXX

Grimmjow scowled as he bent to retrieve the unconscious shinigami he had been sent to find. He stepped over the still glowing remains of the shield he had destroyed and walked back to Ulquiorra, with Bya hung limply over his shoulder.

"You just _had_ to go and tell him," the blue-haired Espada complained, "I had plans of my own for this guy…"

"Well," said Ulquiorra, "I mightn't have said anything, but when I realized who he actually was, my interest was piqued. _He_ happened to walk in and saw my research…and asked why I was interested in the captain of Squad Six."

"You should have kept your damned mouth shut. Now I have to watch all of this beauty go to him. He'll probably just interrogate him and have him killed."

"Ah," said Ulquiorra, unsmiling, "well maybe if you ask him nicely, he'll let you have him when he's done with him. Whatever powers he had have somehow been drained. I doubt that Lord Aizen will find him terribly useful."

Ulquiorra opened a garganta and the two stepped into the precipice world. They started back towards Las Noches, but came to a stop as they spotted a person lying unconscious in their path.

"Well, what have we here?" Grimmjow said curiously, "Is this where their senkaimon intersects our path?"

"Yes, actually."

Ulquiorra leaned over the unconscious captain and turned him over, catching his breath softly as his face came into view.

"Shit…Am I seeing double?" Grimmjow asked, his eyes widening, "There's two of them?"

"Interesting," said the fourth Espada, bending to pick up Byakuya, "I think our master will want to examine both of them closely."

"Damn…" said Grimmjow, "I knew you were going to say that!"


	11. Soul Decline

**Chapter 11: Soul Decline**

"Damn it!" Ichigo hissed, glaring at the shattered remains of his shield and the splashes of blood on the wooden platform where he had left Bya waiting for him, "I told him he would be safe here."

"You didn't know the Espada would track him here."

"They seemed to have no problem following us to the club," Ichigo argued.

"But you weren't trying to hide his reiatsu then. You were cautious in bringing him here, because you figured Byakuya would be after the two of you."

Ichigo shook his head sadly.

"What am I going to tell Renji?" he said, his eyes darkening, "He's going to hate me for this."

"No one's going to blame you," Kisuke assured him, "You were trying to get him away from Byakuya…or at least the nasty piece of work claiming also to be Byakuya."

The two turned a Renji flash stepped into the clearing.

"Renji!" exclaimed Ichigo, "I thought that Byakuya arrested you!"

"Yeah…well…I couldn't leave Bya alone. I stood up to Captain Kuchiki and just told him I was going after Bya."

He caught sight of the broken bits of shielding and blood, and caught his breath.

"Ichigo…wh-where is Bya?" he asked breathlessly.

XXXXXXXXXX

The first sensation Byakuya had upon waking was an icy coldness that penetrated all of the way down into his veins. It was a temptation to let the cold make him shiver, but he fought it down and forced his eyes open. It did little good at first, as the place he was in was dark. He was grateful, of course, that he wasn't still in the precipice world, waiting for the cleaner to dispose of him, but his current situation was certainly questionable at best. He reached around in the darkness, and his fingertips encountered a second body within the place…and as his eyes adjusted, he recognized the man to be the one that Renji had called 'Bya.' He was unconscious, but beginning to stir uncomfortably…groaning and reaching up to touch his head, which Byakuya could see bore a nasty, bleeding wound.

A moment later, he realized that his head was hurting him in that exact same spot. He reached up and touched the area, staring down at Bya and frowning. Sighing softly, he moved closer to Bya and extended a hand over the wound, focusing his power and slowly healing it.

The light of the healing spell revealed to the noble that he and Bya had been placed in a dark cell. And judging by the coldness and darkness, the wicked reiatsu around them and the rough, gravely voices he heard, he wagered that they were in Hueco Mundo…most likely at Las Noches.

"Kami…" he muttered, "Like I haven't spent enough time in this damned desert."

He shook his head and continued to heal Bya, marveling that his spirit energy hadn't been sealed away. Then, he realized that they had instead, simply used a limiter. He could manage healing spells and perhaps a flash step, but little more.

"Bastards…"

He left off as he noticed Bya looking at him with a guarded expression.

"What is it?" he asked softly.

"I d-don't understand," Bya whispered, "Where are we? Why are you here? Why are you healing me?"

"We are prisoners of Las Noches," Byakuya explained, "I do not know how we came to be here. I lost consciousness in the precipice world and woke up here. Do you remember what happened to you?"

Bya sat up slowly, putting a hand to his head and wincing.

"It…it was that…blue-haired Espada…from before. He found me…and there was another with him. The blue-haired one hit me in the head and knocked me out."

Byakuya's eyes narrowed and his fingers touched his own head again.

"I see," he said, thinking.

"I asked you why you were healing me…" Bya said again, "I know you don't like me."

"I do not have any feelings for or against you," Byakuya said calmly, "I merely arrived to apprehend you for questioning."

"You were furious when you found me in bed with Renji," Bya went on, "That's why you attacked me."

"I attacked you because you attacked me and impersonated me…"

"No…" Bya insisted, "I am not stupid. I saw the expression on your face. It was a killing rage you were in. You weren't thinking of those other things…"

Byakuya looked around the cell.

"We should attempt to free ourselves."

He stood and walked to the front of the cell and contemplated the bars and door.

"Under the limiter, I haven't the reiatsu to break out," Byakuya commented, "I don't suppose you have any ideas?"

Bya walked the edges of the room and tested the strength of bars and door. He studied the lock carefully and bit his lip, thinking. He blinked as an idea struck him.

"The kenseiken," he said quietly, "It has a piece that might be useful in picking the lock…if you break it off."

Byakuya frowned at the idea, but had to concede that it seemed the best way. Bya stood, watching the corridor outside the cell as Byakuya removed the kenseiken, extracted the sharp metal piece he needed, then worked quietly at the lock. He stole a glance back at the other.

"Byakuya…may I ask you? What do you think I am? Do you really think I am some kind of hollow or a clone?" he asked.

Byakuya didn't look up and continued to work at the lock.

"I am not certain," he commented, "I remember the green hollow that attacked me…and waking up in the deep desert alone. I believe that perhaps when the green hollow attacked me, his power somehow created you."

Bya considered his answer quietly for a moment.

"But if I am a clone or something, then why do I remember everything from your life? How would this hollow be able to make me do that?"

Byakuya shook his head.

"I do not know…flesh memory, a reiatsu imprint…"

"But if the hollow went to such lengths to create me…then why did he seek to kill me afterwards? It seems such trouble to go through if his aim was to kill me."

Byakuya's frown deepened and he narrowed his eyes.

"The hollow tried to kill you?" he asked, "When?"

Bya shook his head.

"It followed us back to the Seireitei and stalked me. It attacked me several times. So…I don't believe the hollow made me as a clone. His effort to make me like you doesn't make sense in light of the fact of him simply wanting to kill me."

"Hmm…" said Byakuya, continuing the lock picking.

Bya sighed.

"Although, he probably expected a weakling like me to be a lot easier to kill than you…" he commented.

Byakuya paused and glanced back at Bya for a moment, the fingers of one hand moving to touch the place on his head that had been hurting before.

"Hmm…" he muttered again, turning back to his work.

"He thought he had killed me when he found me in the living world. He said that since I was dead…that he would be made whole again."

Byakuya froze, thinking.

"He would…be made whole again?" he repeated, blinking slowly.

He turned and looked more closely as Bya. Bya stared back at him, wide-eyed.

"What is it?" he asked softly.

Byakuya said nothing, but reached out and captured Bya's hand. He brought a fingertip to the other's palm and sent a pulse of kido through it. Bya pulled his hand away instinctively and glared at him.

"That hurt! Why did you do that?" he demanded.

Byakuya stared down at his own hand, rubbing it gently. Bya blinked in surprise.

"You…_felt_ that?" he asked softly.

Byakuya nodded and reached for Bya's hand again.

"No way…that hurt…"

"I won't hurt you. I want to know if…"

He captured Bya's hand and released the reiatsu he could under the limiter into the other, raising it as high as he could. Bya met his eyes questioningly, then nodded in understanding.

"They placed a limiter on your reiatsu," he concluded, "and they supposed my reiatsu was so weak they didn't need to…but if you can affect my reiatsu level…"

Bya turned and raised his spiritual pressure, nodding as Byakuya's lifted his. He focused on the lock and breathed a kido spell, then watched in awe as the lock broke.

"Kami…" he whispered in disbelief, "Byakuya…?"

The other gave him a look of warning.

"I think that you had best remain close to me," he told Bya, "It seems as though we are strongly linked…and can be most easily overcome through attacks on you."

"But because of the limiter, the only means of attack you have is me," countered Bya.

"So it seems we are quite dependent on each other…for the moment," Byakuya concluded.

He opened the cell door and moved out into the corridor on catlike feet. Bya followed closely, looking down at where Byakuya still held onto his hand.

"I was here before…" Bya whispered.

"To retrieve Renji when he was a prisoner here," Byakuya added, "This way. There is…"

"…a wall we may be able to break through to reach the outside," Bya finished, "if we can raise a strong enough kido blast."

Byakyuya nodded.

They continued through several corridors until Byakuya found the outer wall he had been seeking. He studied it carefully, then found a place on it that seemed to satisfy him. He took Bya's hand and placed it on the rock wall, then raised his reiatsu and sent it pulsing through his look-alike. Bya focused on the spot and whispered an incantation to bring the spell to its highest level. Blue light flashed and kido exploded from his outstretched hands, blasting the wall and making a hole…unfortunately, not big enough.

"Damn!" Byakuya hissed, glaring at the wall, "Again, quickly."

"Too late!" Bya exclaimed as a group of guards appeared in the hallway.

He sent another kido blast at the guards, then turned back to the wall and sent another blast into the hole his last spell had made. Pounding feet sounded in the corridor as more rock fell away.

"Again!" snapped Byakuya.

Bya sent a final blast through the hole, widening it just enough. He flash stepped through, followed closely by Byakuya, and the two found themselves dropping down onto the sand outside the prison area as the alarms sounded and sounds of pursuit closed in.

"This way!" Byakuya said, grabbing Bya's hand and flash stepping.

The two disappeared as a kido blast reached the place they had been. They ran alongside the building and flash stepped up onto a high rock wall. They started to flash step down again, but were taken off their feet as a cero pounded the wall beneath them, reducing it to dust and sending them crashing down onto the sand. The reiatsu around them rose, and as they turned to run, Bya gave a gasp of dismay and fell back to the ground. Byakuya simply lifted him over a shoulder and flash stepped again and again. He was nearly to the outer marker, when someone appeared in front of him, and he inhaled sharply, sliding to a stop.

"Sousuke…Aizen…" he managed, as the other drew his blade.

A moment later, he found himself falling.

XXXXXXXXXX

Kisuke and Yoruichi dropped down into Hueco Mundo, and were joined a moment later by Ichigo and Renji. The four were careful to conceal their reiatsu and they moved cautiously among the rocks to keep from being seen.

"What's that?" Ichigo asked softly, "The alarms are…?"

"Yeah," Kisuke said softly, "Something tripped the alarms. And I would guess that it would likely be our missing friend. Power or no, nothing contains our Byakuya for very long."

"You got that right…" commented Renji, following as Kisuke turned them towards the fortress.

"Watch yourselves," Yoruichi warned them, "The hollows about the fortress will be watchful."

"How will we know if Bya escaped?" asked Ichigo.

Kisuke sighed.

"It'll be tough with him having such low…"

He broke off as Renji stiffened and gave a soft gasp.

"C-captain!" he hissed, pointing.

The other's stared as Sousuke Aizen appeared in front of what appeared to be Byakuya holding an unconscious Bya. There was a blinding flash of light and Byakuya sank to the ground at Aizen's feet. Kisuke sighed.

"I guess we know now that the escape attempt failed," he commented, "Come on, there's a good place to observe the fortress from over there…"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Well?" Aizen queried, watching as Gin carefully studied what appeared to be two versions of the Squad Six captain, one in uniform, one not, "Can you figure out which is him?"

Gin studied the reiatsu of both, then glanced at the instrument panel on the computer hooked up the monitors placed on the two restrained forms. He shook his head and frowned.

"What is it?" asked Aizen, "It should be relatively easy to tell which is the false one…"

"It should be," Gin commented, "but looking at this…I keep coming to the same conclusion. They are both Byakuya Kuchiki."

"What?" Aizen said, frowning and moving closer, "How can that be?"

"Look for yourself," the silver-haired shinigami said, shaking his head again.

Aizen studied the readings and looked back at the two unconscious forms. He looked more closely at the readout.

"Subject one is at full reiatsu under the limiter…normal in most functions, but his soul consistency is about half normal level. Subject two has almost no reiatsu and also appears to be functioning at half soul consistency. Odd…"

"What, Sousuke?" asked Gin, following his gaze to the two prisoners.

"The soul consistency can only be affected by something that causes a 'tear' or 'break' in the soul. When Kisuke Urahara was attempting to hide the hougyoku, he spoke of this phenomenon. He said that the soul could be torn, but had to be repaired or soul consistency would deteriorate and the soul would die. And look, both of these…forms…are in a slow decline. Simply put, they are dying."

Gin gave Aizen a sly grin.

"Ah well," he said off-handedly, "one less of them to worry about, ne? Shall we put them out of their misery?"

Aizen shook his head.

"No…I want to study this. Wake them."


	12. Exploration

**Chapter 12: Exploration**

**(This chapter has been amended slightly, so the story will also divert a little from the original. I had written myself into a corner, so this should 'unstick' things so I can finish! :) Enjoy the chapter!)**

Sousuke Aizen gazed down at Byakuya, studying him carefully as the Squad Six captain glared back at him, then moved on to examine the less hateful, more wary Bya. He switched back and forth between them, checking the readouts on the monitors around them and seeming to come to a decision. He moved to Bya's side and caught his eye.

"Byakuya," he said calmly, "you seem to be afraid of something. What do you fear?"

"Do not speak to him," Byakuya advised Bya, "He only seeks to play mind games."

A slow smile played over Aizen's lips. He reached down and released Bya's restraints.

"Come with me," he said quietly.

Bya remained frozen on the examination table, his eyes wide and his chest heaving softly. Aizen studied him for a moment, then nodded to Gin, who opened the door to the examination room. The monitors attached to Bya squealed and beeped in response, prompting the blue-haired Espada to grin crookedly at him as he entered the room.

"Grimmjow," Aizen said softly, "You said you were acquainted with this one…"

"Yeah…" the sixth Espada said gruffly, "We've met."

"Go and make him comfortable in my quarters…and wait there for me…"

Bya caught his breath and shivered as the blue-haired Espada dragged him to his feet. Byakuya's glare became deadly.

"What are you about, Aizen?" he hissed angrily, "Are you proving once again how low a snake you are? How you've become so accustomed to slithering along the ground, you've lost your backbone? Why don't you play your games with me, instead? Afraid you can't intimidate me?"

He gasped as Gin struck him across the face. Aizen and Gin turned in surprise as Bya gave a pained cry and put a hand to his face.

"Interesting…" Aizen mused, "Grimmjow…"

Grimmjow gave Bya a shove and the noble stumbled out into the corridor, leaving an agitated Byakuya behind. Aizen turned to Gin.

"Monitor this one while I am gone. I want precise records of everything he experiences."

Gin smiled and nodded, then watched as Aizen flash stepped away. He turned back to Byakuya, tightening his restraints and watching the monitors.

"I guess I don't have to tell you this might hurt a bit," Gin said, grinning, "But I have a feeling that what's really gonna hurt is knowing what Lord Aizen's going to be doing to your weaker half."

His smile widened wickedly.

"You know that's why he chose to do it to _him_, ne? Because you're the stronger one?"

"Hmmm…if you truly believe that," Byakuya said in a low voice, "then you _are_ as stupid as you look."

Gin's expression darkened and he raised his hand to strike the noble again, but stopped short.

"Ah…never mind. Ain't worth it, is it? After all, the real prize will be seeing you feel what Aizen's putting _him_ through. This is going to be fun. Only thing to be sorry for is that I'm not there to enjoy him too. Such a lovely, gentle…vulnerable creature, ne? Well, maybe that will work in his favor. After all, Lord Aizen has a thing for little lost creatures. Remember his Hinamori?"

"Do you remember how it ended?" Byakuya asked, "All who place themselves near Aizen will feel the sting of his betrayal…even those such as yourself…Gin."

The silver-haired shinigami frowned.

"I said I would enjoy this," he said in a deadly voice, "and now I will truly embrace it. Prepare yourself, Captain Kuchiki, you and your inner child are about to experience the destructive power of Lord Aizen. He knows what he has, you see. He'll take that one apart from the inside…and when he is done with that other, both of you will wish for death."

XXXXXXXXXX

Grimmjow laughed wickedly and pushed Bya in the direction of Aizen's bed. He flash stepped forward, but gasped in pain as he found himself at the receiving end of a devilishly hard kick. Even as he fell back, he felt three more lightning fast strikes that left him gasping.

"Little bitch!" he hissed, raising his reiatsu.

Bya caught his breath sharply and flash stepped towards the window. A dismayed cry escaped him as an arm caught him around the waist and dragged him back from it.

"Where are you going, sweetheart?" the Espada asked, his fingers digging into the noble's soft skin, "You may have broken my nose, but I'll break you in half!"

"Let me go, you bastard!" cried Bya, struggling and kicking.

Grimmjow howled as a heel connected with his groin and he dropped to the floor. Bya flash stepped towards the window again, but as he moved, a flash step sounded, and he found himself caught again…this time in the grip of Sousuke Aizen. He caught his breath sharply, staring up into the calm brown eyes of his captor, wide-eyed. Aizen's spiritual pressure rose and Bya felt suffocating power close in around him. He bit back a soft sound of discomfort as Aizen gazed down at him.

"Bya, is it?" he asked softly.

Bya stared back at him wordlessly.

"I am curious how this happened to you. Why don't you tell me?" Aizen said quietly.

The noble merely frowned and glared at him.

"I see," Aizen went on, "You may be physically weaker than he is, but you have your own kind of strength, don't you?"

He touched Bya's face gently and the noble flinched.

"Do you even understand what you are? Do you know what a precarious situation you are in? I don't know how you got yourself into this, but you would be smart to accept my assistance in figuring it out before it is too late."

"Huh…" huffed Bya, "As though I would ever accept help from the likes of you. You would smile at my face while stabbing me in the back. I would rather take my chance on my own!"

Aizen's spiritual pressure rose and Bya's legs weakened beneath him. The leader of the hollows smiled.

"You are foolish not to accept my help…truly."

"You hate the noble families…because we are the servants of the king," Bya said, frowning, "You targeted my sister because of this. You betrayed us so that you could murder our king and supplant him yourself. You have nothing but contempt for my clan and especially me. Why would you think I would be stupid enough to rest my fate in your hands. I would take death's hand first!"

Aizen's face moved closer until his lips were inches from the noble's.

"You will take death's hand much sooner, Bya, if you continue to resist me. Now…I have asked you to tell me how you came to be like this. Do not keep me waiting or I will allow Grimmjow to repay you for the damage you did to him."

"And you think that your threats will frighten me into obeying you?" Bya asked quietly, "I will admit to my fear…but I won't be a slave to it. You have miscalculated in according to me the wrong kind of weakness. What I lack in physical strength, I make up for in strength of heart. Do as you will then. I have no reason to obey you."

"Grimmjow…" Aizen said softly, "Instruct Bya in why it is not wise to disobey me."

The sixth Espada's spiritual pressure rose until it was crushing. Released by Aizen, Bya dropped to his knees, gasping for breath. Grimmjow moved in close, glaring down at the struggling noble, then drew back and drove a foot into his stomach, lifting Bya and sending him crashing into the wall. The noble gasped in pain and groaned as he lifted himself, then Grimmjow appeared suddenly in front of him and struck him in the face, sending him tumbling to the floor again. Bya inhaled sharply and closed his eyes as the sixth Espada's weight dropped down on his back and long fingers curled into his hair and pulled painfully.

"Now…" he growled softly into Bya's ear, "You will tell Lord Aizen what he wants to know or I will follow through on what I promised you before."

He ran his tongue up the length of the restrained shinigami's pale throat. Across the room from them, Aizen smiled and nodded.

"Bya," he said calmly, "I will ask you again. How did this happen to you?"

Bya's breath came out in heaving gasps, but he only glared back at Aizen and held himself silent. Aizen watched closely as Grimmjow dug his nails into the shinigami's arms, tearing into his flesh and leaving small swells of blood on his torn clothing. He met the noble's pained eyes for a moment.

"Grimmjow…place him on the bed…and hold him."

Grimmjow laughed wickedly.

"You want him facedown or stormy side up?" the Espada asked.

Aizen blinked slowly.

"I think I will get the message across better if it is delivered in a more direct manner."

He watched as Grimmjow tore the noble's clothes away and tied him with kido restraints. Bya's face took on a distant, empty look and Aizen frowned. He undressed and moved in between the noble's parted thighs, gazing down at him thoughtfully. Then he reached for his blade. He smiled at the sudden increase of tension in Bya's body and the hint of terror that entered his eyes.

"Are you afraid now?" Aizen hissed softly, "You should be. You are about to pay for your arrogance and disobedience, Bya. I will have what I want from you, even if I have to pry it from those pretty lips of yours."

"Do as you will, then," Bya whispered in a choked voice, "You will only find that you have underestimated me."

He broke off, shivering as Aizen reached down and stroked himself until his erection was large and wet with readiness.

"I will give you one more chance to tell me what I want to know…and if you will not, Grimmjow and I will teach you the meaning of pain…and my zanpakutou will keep you in the throes of that pain until you give in."

Bya found himself unable to answer, but only stared up at the placid, unsmiling face of the leader of the hollows and shivered inwardly. Aizen studied his tormented eyes and heaving chest for a moment longer, then sighed in resignation.

"Shatter, Kyouka Suigetsu," he said quietly.

He dropped down on top of the noble, teasing his entrance lightly and bringing their faces close together.

"Byakuya told me that I chose incorrectly in deciding to interrogate you instead of him. And you, yourself said I had underestimated you, Bya. I hope, for your sake that is true…because when I begin, my hypnosis will amplify the physical and emotional impact of everything we do to your body. As I want to study the progression of what is happening, we will not permanently damage you…but we will cause you copious amounts of pain…and after we are done, the hypnosis will cause that pain to resonate inside you…making the scene repeat itself as though you are experiencing it again and again…until you give in…and I stop it."

Bya caught his breath slowly and took a trembling breath.

"Sousuke Aizen…" he said in a shaky whisper, "I have _lived_ inside Byakuya Kuchiki all of my life. I have lost nearly everyone I dared to love…and have been forced to do things that nearly tore me apart. I have suffered horrid torments upon my body in defense of my pride. There is nothing you can do to me that is worse than what I have already endured. Empty physical pain will not be enough to shatter me…but if you are foolish enough to believe it will, then I cannot stop you. You can make me hurt…bleed…even shed tears and scream…but you will not get what you want from me…not ever!"

Aizen's eyes darkened with fury and his reiatsu rose until Grimmjow shook softly with the force of it and he no longer smiled at what was happening. Bya continued to gaze into his captor's eyes, even as he found himself nearly unable to breathe from the crushing weight of his power. Aizen glared back and Bya could feel his mind working at something. Finally, the man's eyes sparked dangerously and he smiled down at the trapped noble.

"You're somehow still drawing strength from _him_, aren't you?" he said quietly, "Well, my friend, that is about to end."

He touched his blade again.

_Thank kami…he'll be protected, _thought Bya, _I can focus on holding just this part of myself together…_

"Now then," Aizen went on, "Are you still feeling cocky and sure of yourself, Bya? You have too much arrogance for one who is weak…and now alone. But you brought this on yourself."

Bya inhaled sharply as the leader of the hollows positioned himself, steeling himself for what was about to happen. But just as Sousuke Aizen prepared to make good on his threats, something blazing, furious and ungodly powerful began to burn inside Bya's frightened heart.

Aizen and Grimmjow froze, staring at him in surprise, then broke away and shielded themselves as immense power exploded wildly from Bya's restrained body, shattering his bonds, destroying the room and leaving him blissfully unconscious.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Not feeling anything yet?" Gin said, frowning down at Byakuya in surprise, "I know they must have started in on him by now…"

Byakuya felt the deep silence that had descended on his mind and felt a jolt of concern.

What happened? I don't feel a thing. It's like he has disappeared. I know he's in pain, but it doesn't reach my body! Kami…what are they doing to him?

"Oh…" said Gin, his smile returning, "I see. He wanted you to wonder. He wanted you to think hard about what they're doing to your weak, gentle other half. It's wicked, really, leaving you in such doubt. You must be nearly beside yourself!"

"Shut up, you vile traitor," growled Byakuya, his reiatsu flaring under the limiter, "You and Aizen are as stupid as I always thought you were."

They have no idea how strong he actually is. I only hope that he is strong enough to endure whatever they are doing. It's maddening…not feeling anything…losing that part of myself. But right now…what he has done…makes us emotionally invulnerable. But not physically. Bya…I hope you know what you are doing, protecting me this way…

He barely felt the impact as Gin's hand connected with his face.

"You need to learn some respect," he said in a low, dangerous voice, "or once we're done with him, we'll hurt you, too."

But to really break us, they would have to attack us both, I think.

He refused to answer Gin, but laid quietly, straining in his mind for some sense of what was happening to his counterpart. As he waited, his heart pounding nervously and the sweat rising on his skin, a hell butterfly arrived. Gin listened to the message, then turned and smiled down at him.

"It seems that your better half has become unresponsive. Lord Aizen is having him removed to the prison level. You will meet him there and heal him…and in the morning, Lord Aizen will question him again."

Byakuya held back a sigh of relief as his restraints were released and he was dragged to his feet and shoved back along the passageways to the prison level. He was left alone in the cell he had awakened in, surrounded in darkness and waiting breathlessly. Several minutes later, the cell door opened and someone else was shoved forward into the cell. He slumped to the floor as the door slammed shut behind him.

Byakuya crawled across the dark cell, not wanting to rise for fear of stepping on or tripping over Bya. He found the other collapsed by the door, breathing in short, clipped gasps and unresponsive.

"Bya," he said, shaking the other, "Bya…"

He pulled his look-alike's body away from the door, using a thin shaft of light that leaked in from a crack in the wall to illuminate Bya's face. He caught his breath sharply at the tormented expression and half-closed, haunted looking eyes.

"Bya…answer me!"

He leaned over the other, searching his body for injuries and staring in surprise as he found the other to be completely undamaged.

"Not healed. Just never damaged," he whispered, his eyes haunted, "Bya, what did that man do to you?"


	13. Kokoro Nakigoe

**Chapter 13: Kokoro Nakigoe**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**We are strong in turns, each one lending what both need. But we are not invincible. The thing that feeds our strength most greatly lies within the heart and outside the body…**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

Byakuya sat with his back against the cold stone wall and his arms and haori wrapped around the spellbound form of Bya. His counterpart still hadn't spoken, and only laid shivering against his shoulder as he stared into the darkness and searched his mind for something he could do to free them. But with the limiter on his powers and Bya unresponsive, his options were limited. Unable to find an answer, he focused instead on evoking some sort of response in the injured man. Bya continued to gaze blankly through half opened eyes, though his breathing had steadied and as he had lain in Byakuya's arms, his body had relaxed somewhat.

"Bya," Byakuya said in a low voice, "We have to escape this place before they come back. And I am not able to think of a proper strategy."

Bya only remained still and quiet.

"I sense there is still something affecting you," he went on, "but with you cut off from me this way, I cannot perceive what it is or what to do to overcome it. Bya, can you connect with me? Were we disconnected because of something you did? Was it something Aizen did? I sensed his power being used, but I also sensed something powerful coming from you, though I do not understand what it was. Yet, if you have some kind of power I do not understand, we must use that power now to free ourselves. I know you have strength beyond what everyone sees…I sense it. I still don't understand how we're connected or what you are, exactly, but I do know that the only way we'll escape is if we both use what resources we have. I was able to focus power through you before. We need to try to combine our abilities again. Bya…Bya, we are running out of time."

He paused, his eyes widening as he sensed Aizen's reiatsu turning in their direction.

"Bya…" he whispered warningly, "Bya…he is returning."

His counterpart stirred softly. Byakuya turned his head to look down at the other and caught his breath softly as white light began to glow around his body. His expression didn't change and he did not seem to have regained any lucidity, but something was happening.

"I sense power around you, but…this is not reiatsu based power, as ours usually is. I don't understand where it is coming from…"

The sensation building within the other continued to grow as Aizen moved closer…

"Bya…" Byakuya said warily, feeling the room begin to rumble under the weight of whatever power was building in his counterpart, "Bya, what's happening?"  
He heard raised voices and pounding feet moving in their direction. Bya stirred against his shoulder again and the odd glow around him began to pulsate. Light from the other's body flooded the cell and the ground around them shook heavily now. Byakuya stared uncertainly at Bya, feeling that something was about to happen, but unable to imagine what. He held Bya's body against him and came to his feet as the cell door was thrown open and Aizen stepped into the cell. He stared at the two shinigamis and ordered the guards to take Bya from him.

"Do not come near," Byakuya warned them, "Something is…"

He broke off as the strange power peaked and Bya's head lifted off of his shoulders. His chin lifted, and wide powerlit eyes found Aizen's. There was a long moment of near silence, except for the rumble that accompanied the noble's rising power. Aizen's face registered surprise, and Byakuya felt the traitor's reiatsu rising. Then Bya's mouth opened wide and the power exploded around them.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Do you feel that, Kisuke?" Yoruichi asked, turning her head to gaze at the prison area where she had sensed Byakuya's reiatsu, "What is that?"

The shopkeeper frowned and followed her eyes to the prison building.

"I don't know," he admitted, "but it's coming from inside the prison…and it's centered right where we sensed Byakuya's reiatsu."

"So what do we do?" asked Ichigo, his hand tightening around Zangetsu.

"I'm not sure yet," Kisuke admitted, "but have your weapons ready. Look…the guards are being distracted by the disturbance…"

The ground began to rumble beneath them.

"Kisuke…" Renji hissed softly, "I know I suck at sensing reiatsu…but…how can I not read power this strong. I feel something there, but…"

"This isn't reiatsu based…" Kisuke mused, "and I don't think I've ever felt anything like it before…"

Their heads turned as the ground shook harder, and raised voices could be heard in the distance.

"What the hell…?" Renji muttered, drawing Zabimaru.

He moved forward under the cover of the rocks they had concealed themselves in, and stared at the building as a white glow began to envelope it.

"Ah…Kisuke…" he hissed breathlessly, "What the hell is happening?"

As they looked on, blinding white light erupted from the prison, enveloping it entirely, and sending a sudden shock wave roaring in their direction. Instantly, the four dropped to the ground, and without a breathed command, Zabimaru exploded into ban kai and rose protectively around them. They covered their faces, blocking their ears as power swept over them. Zabimaru trembled and Renji gave a cry of surprise as the skeletal snake screamed in protest…shattered…and fell in pieces around them. Sand, rock and debris raked them as they flattened themselves against the ground, the power raging over them and threatening to sweep them away.

Renji closed his eyes and buried his face in his arms, hissing with pain as the sand stung his skin. He coughed and buried his face deeper in his cloak, feeling the press of Ichigo's body on one side of him and Yoruichi's on the other. After a moment, the explosive wave passed and they were left in a cloud of dust. The four came to their feet and squinted as the dust cloud began to clear. They looked again in the direction of the prison, and caught their breath in dismay.

"Sweet, kami…" whispered Kisuke, "What was that? I've never seen that kind of destructive power that wasn't reiatsu based…and that…that cry! Did you hear it?"

"I didn't just hear it, Kisuke," said Ichigo softly, "It's like it ripped through my whole body! Was that…a ban kai? A cero? What?"

"It wasn't either," Kisuke said, frowning, "I told you that it wasn't reiatsu based…but that cry…"

He watched as the ruins of the prison resolved slowly in the distance and shook his head.

"Whatever it was…it contained incredible power. But…"

"We have to get down there!" Renji exclaimed, "Captain Kuchiki and Bya were in there!"

"Hang on a sec," Kisuke warned him, "You just had your ban kai destroyed. You haven't got the reiatsu to go…"

He broke off as the redhead flash stepped away with Ichigo on his heels.

"Damn…kids!" Kisuke muttered, joining Yoruichi and flash stepping after them.

They blazed across the sand, racing towards the remains of the prison as the sirens within the fortress wailed and the reiatsu in the area swelled. Renji and Ichigo reached the area just beyond the prison and slid to a stop as a shinigami flash stepped out of the wreckage, carrying a second person over his shoulder.

"Captain!" cried Renji, racing in the noble's direction.

"Renji!" cried Yoruichi, "Wait…he's…"

"Shades!" hissed Kisuke, "That power…came from…"

At that moment, another form dressed in white, but looking battered from the explosion, followed Byakuya out of the destroyed prison.

"Byakuya, look out!" cried Ichigo, raising Zangetsu, "It's Aizen!"

He sent a blast ahead of him that sent Aizen off course and gave Byakuya more distance. Renji closed in on the two as Aizen came to his feet and his reiatsu rose menacingly.

"Stay away from him…Renji," the leader of the hollows warned him, "He's lost control…"

Renji ignored him and flash stepped towards the place where Byakua had stopped and turned.

"Renji…stay back!" the noble said warningly.

Renji gasped in surprise as white light began to rise around the body he held against him.

"That power…" he breathed in disbelief, "That was…Bya?"

Aizen stood quietly as Yoruichi and Kisuke joined Ichigo, blocking his path to where Byakuya stood, holding Bya. Bya slid down off of his shoulder, but continued to lean heavily against him as the white power flared around him.

"You would be smart to destroy that thing," Aizen advised them, "He only looks harmless. In actuality, he could, and probably will, destroy all of you. You can see he's self destructing…"

"Don't act as though you understand him," Kisuke countered, holding Benhime ready, "You don't even know what he is or understand his source of power, I'll wager. I don't know what you did that caused this, but I will figure it out…and I'll figure out what he is, too."

Aizen laughed softly.

"Yes…" he said softly, "You like to play with dangerous things, don't you Urahara? It was that way with the hougyoku, and look what happened. Kind of blew up in your face, ne? Well, since you're going to be destroyed anyway, I'll give you a place to start. Here's a clue…The clock is ticking. You have to find a way to put the pieces together before he dies. Remember, Urahara, when the heart dies unresolved, all that is left is a hollow shell."

Aizen's smile widened as hollow guards began to appear around him.

"Now…take that ticking time bomb and let it destroy you. I assure you that it's only a matter of time before it does."

He turned and flash stepped away. After a moment longer, the guards followed. All eyes turned to Byakuya, who stood a short distance away from them, and the silent glowing form that he held against him.

"Be calm now," Byakuya told Bya, "You protected me. Now let me do the same for you. Your power is formidable, but I could see that it harmed you to use it…and that you could not control it. Aizen is gone and we are among friends. Your power is not needed."

The others stood frozen and watching as the light around Bya shimmered and began to fade. His eyes closed and he rested quietly against Byakuya, seeming to drift off. Byakuya lifted him into his arms and observed the others quietly for a moment.

"Arigato, for coming to find him. I will see to him now."

Renji let out a sharp breath and shook his head.

"No way," he said in a low voice, "There is no way you are leaving here with him. You tried to kill him before. You're going to take him to have him questioned. He'll only get hurt worse…"

"Renji's right," Ichigo said, holding Zangetsu ready, "You've done nothing but hurt him. Let him go. Let him come with us."

"No," Byakuya said firmly, "No one will come near him. He stays with me."

"And what will that accomplish, Kuchiki-san?" asked Kisuke, "You are in no condition to try to handle this situation on your own. How will you handle this?"

Byakuya stared back at him with uncertainty in his eyes.

"I see," Kisuke went on, "You haven't a clue, do you?"

"I have some of the pieces," Byakuya said softly, "though, unlike him, I lack the loyal friends who would assist me. Still, I am powerful enough to protect the two of us. And my manor is home to the largest store of knowledge in the three worlds, except for the library in the spirit king's own palace. I will find the answers I need."

Kisuke sighed softly and shook his head.

"Kuchiki-san," he said quietly, "You have more friends than you think. You can't find the answers alone. At very least, if you will not allow us to take him, let me get readings of his reiatsu and tell me what you know so that we can work on this as well. We all want the same thing. None of us want harm to come to you or Bya."

Byakuya considered his words silently for several long minutes. Finally, he nodded.

"You may approach, Urahara-san, but only you…and do not try to take him from me. Give me your word."

Kisuke nodded.

"You have my word I won't try to take him."

He handed Benihime to Ichigo and slowly approached Byakuya and Bya. Renji, Ichigo and Yoruichi moved closer, but stopped a short distance away to observe. Kisuke reached Byakuya and removed a small device from within his clothes. He touched it first to Byakuya's palm, then to Bya's.

"Now," said Kisuke, "What have you learned about him?"

"We are connected empathically," Byakuya explained, "Damage inflicted on one is experienced as pain by the other. I do not know if we are parts of a whole, or if he was created when I was attacked in Hueco Mundo. The answer, I think, lies with the hollow that attacked me. Somehow, it caused me to be transported deep into the desert. And apparently, Bya appeared in my place and the creature has sought to kill him…not just at the battle site, but ever since…it has stalked him. Bya told me that when it attacked him in Karakura Town that it said that when Bya died, he would be whole again. I have a suspicion about what that might mean. While in the desert, I encountered another hollow like the one that attacked me…but this one was docile and weak. It cowered and ran when confronted. I wonder now if the two are connected as Bya and I are. I think that I need to see if our library contains any references to such a hollow…and if so, how to resolve the situation. I think it is not so simple as killing the hollow. The way in which I was attacked and the hollow's focus on destroying Bya makes me wary."

Kisuke nodded.

"And do you know what kind of power that was that he was emitting?" the shopkeeper asked, "I know it wasn't reiatsu based…"

"No…it wasn't reiatsu based, and I am not certain what it was. I remember a reference to something similar, which was contained in one of the past clan leader's journals. I need to return to that source to know for certain, but it may have been something we call kokoro nakigore…a heart cry. If so, it is not reiatsu based, but caused by an uncontrolled release of pure, concentrated emotion. It strikes with the force of a ban kai attack, but is more volatile because it does not differentiate between friend and foe. It harms the one who emits it and anyone caught in its path. Its use is an act of desperation…and it drains the wielder more viciously each time it is used."

"And what would have made him use that?" Renji asked, his eyes locked on Bya, "What happened to him while you were in there? You said that the two of you are connected, so you should know what he experienced."

Byakuya sighed and lowered his eyes.

"I do not know what Aizen did to him."

"What?" hissed Renji, "You said that…"

"While he was separated from me, the connection between us was affected somehow. Either this was done by Aizen, perhaps by his zanpakutou…or…Bya may have done it himself."

"Why?" asked Ichigo, "Why would he do that?"

Byakuya's eyes rose and met theirs squarely.

"I believe he may have been trying to protect me."

"Protect…you?" Renji asked, his eyes narrowing, "Why the hell would he try to protect you after what you did to him? That doesn't make any sense…and neither does the way you're refusing to let us take him. Why are you doing this, Captain? Bya has never done anything to you. And if it's about us being together…"

"Renji, I wish that was all it was. I know you do not understand, and that you are still angry over my poor reaction when I found the two of you together. But I assure you, what I am doing is for his protection and mine. Now…stay back…The Elders have sensed what happened here and are approaching. Do not interfere with them."

He fell silent again as a wave of flash steps sounded and a group of male and female shinigamis, all bearing some level of resemblance to Byakuya, appeared and set themselves around the noble and Bya. Kisuke backed away and returned to Yoruichi, Renji and Ichigo as one of the elders opened a doorway and the group passed through together. As he passed through the doorway, Bya lifted his head and met Renji's eyes for a moment. The redhead felt a jolt of dismay at what he saw there.

"Damn it!" he swore, sheathing his blade angrily, "I am going to Kuchiki Manor and talking some sense into him…maybe beating it into him, if I have to!"

"Easy Renji," Kisuke said quietly, "He did take Bya with him, but he seems as invested in figuring this out as we are. I believe he really will protect Bya…and now that we have more information, we can use the time to seek answers. I am going back to my lab. You and Ichigo will need to return with Yoruichi and me. You can figure out what you're going to do on the way. Just…remember that Byakuya is not the person you knew before. He's going to be hard to anticipate or to convince. Consider carefully what you will say to him. And remember, if you screw up, Bya is going to be the one hurt. Do what you have to do, but be careful."

Renji's lips tightened and he frowned, but then nodded and followed Kisuke to the garganta. Behind them, Sousuke Aizen watched from the top of one of the towers with curious eyes.

"I wonder how long it will be before they realize…" he whispered.

"It had best be soon," Gin added, "or the Gotei 13 will lose another captain."

"Yes," Aizen said, touching his zanpakutou lightly, "but that will only work in our favor."

"So you won't go after him?"

"Why go after him?" Aizen asked turning away, "Byakuya Kuchiki is going to die. And when he does, he will return here…as a divine hollow."

"You think he's that strong?" Gin queried.

"No…I know he is."


	14. My Lover's Keeper

**Chapter 14: My Lover's Keeper**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**I knelt on the ground to retrieve you…crushed under a wicked man's heel, blood and tears falling onto the dirt all around you. Your hands reached out and clung to me, and I thought you sought safety with me. I did not see the danger you protected me from…until it reached us.**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

Byakuya ignored the stunned stares and whispers as he carried an exhausted Bya in through the front gates of Kuchiki Manor and straight to his bedroom. He closed and locked the doors, using a kido spell to seal them, then carried the other to the dressing area and set him on his feet. Bya stood quietly, his legs steadier and his eyes more clear, but dark and troubled. He said nothing and remained rooted to the spot as Byakuya took two yukatas from the hangers and turned him towards the shower.

Bya flinched under his hands, but allowed himself to be undressed and led in under the hot fall of water. Byakuya undressed and joined him a moment later, then stood behind him, working soap slowly into a lather on his skin, cleaning away the dirt and blood. As the water sent the soap sliding down off of his body, Byakuya examined him carefully, healing the additional damage, caused by Bya's _kokoro nakigore_. As the healing ended, Byakuya was surprised to hear the other's voice rise up over the sound of the falling water.

"Why?" he asked softly, "Why did you lie to Renji? You know what happened. You know what they tried to do to me and what happened. It was obvious…so…"

"You want to know why?" Byakuya repeated, turning Bya so that they faced each other, "It was not my place to speak for you. If you decide you wish to speak to Renji about what happened, that is your decision to make…but no one should interfere with that revelation. Despite the connection between us…the sharing of empathy, that pain belongs to you."

Bya considered his answer for a moment, then nodded briefly, his dark eyes blinking sleepily. He stood still as Byakuya washed and rinsed his hair, then nudged him aside, stepped under the water and began to wash himself. He watched for a few seconds, then reached out and took the soap from his counterpart's hand. Byakuya gazed at him curiously as he returned the gentle treatment he had been given.

"I would heal your injuries," he said softly, "but I haven't those powers."

He washed Byakuya's body slowly, his mind working as his hands moved over the other.

"Byakuya," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the sound of the shower, "I don't understand what happened to me. How did I destroy the prison? Is it as Aizen said? Am I self-destructive? Am I a danger to everyone?"

Byakuya sighed and closed his eyes, leaning into his counterpart's slow, lingering touches.

"You burden your heart with too many questions. Think about how you used your powers…and how you did not. You only used it when the both of us were threatened. Yours is a power meant only for moments of desperation. And I think the use of it was appropriate, given the circumstances. Now that we are free, you should put that out of your mind and focus on finding answers to the more important questions. What did that hollow's attack do to us? What is happening within us right now? What will happen to us as time moves forward? These are the important things…the questions that need answering."

"But what if I lose control again? What if I hurt someone?" Bya asked softly, "What if I hurt Renji? Or Ichigo? Or Rukia? What if I hurt you?"

Byakuya took Bya's face in his hands and met the dark, worried eyes squarely.

"I will not allow you to be put in that situation again. Put it out of your mind and make your mind quiet and clear. There are still dangers for us to concern ourselves with, but now that I have the full use of my powers, I will be able to protect us both. I have to leave briefly to meet with the council. I will leave you sealed in this room and shielded. I only ask that you remain under my protection. This is the way to best ensure that all are kept safe as we proceed. You wish to protect Renji and the others, ne? If so, then remain calm and stay within the shield I set for you."

"You're…going to leave?" Bya asked nervously.

"Only for a short time."

"But…"

The seal and shield will be stronger than the one Ichigo left around you. You will be safe."

"I cannot come with you?" Bya asked.

Byakuya shook his head.

"I do not want them to annoy you with questions…or to try to physically examine you. You understand, they will do this if you accompany me?"

"Oh…" sighed Bya, "I wasn't thinking of that. I just…I hate being alone."

Byakuya's eyes closed and he looked away for a moment.

I understand," he said quietly, "but loneliness is part of both nobility and leadership. A person charged with great responsibility must make sacrifices for the good of others. For all that you are an emotional being, you are a part of me, and so you know this."

Bya's eyes closed slowly and he nodded.

"I will remain here. I will not try to leave."

"Even if Renji should come for you."

"Even then."

He opened his eyes again and Byakuya's lips tightened at the pain in them.

"I will not leave you alone for long."

"Arigato, Byakuya-sama."

Byakuya frowned.

"Why did you call me that?" he asked quietly.

Bya's eyes met his eyes briefly.

"You are the stronger one, the one everyone knows as Byakuya, clan leader and squad captain. I am…nothing. I am powerless unless all is lost. I cannot protect anyone. People fear me because I am not like you, though I look like the one they remember. Byakuya-sama, I left Soul Society because I had no place here. Except for Renji, no one knew what to say to me, how to act in my presence, or what to expect of me. And no matter how I tried, I couldn't be the one they wanted."

"Of course not," Byakuya said in a voice barely above a whisper, "No one ever appreciated that side of us until Hisana…then Renji. That's why you needed me. You understand, I only exist because of that need. Had you not created me, we would never have become so powerful."

Bya's eyes widened in surprise and his face paled.

"I _created_ you?" he whispered.

"Yes…I finally understand who you are…and who I am. I think I understand now what happened when we were attacked. You said that you had all of my memories, but truly, what you had were all of _ours_. We lived together, in one body until that moment…and then we were torn free of each other. I was sent far away, bearing away with me the power meant to protect you. And you were left vulnerable to the hollow. He tried to destroy you then…and kept trying to destroy you, but you were protected by your friends."

"And you were left alone…"

"I fared well enough. My powers protected me. I was strong enough to survive on my own. That was the strength you gifted me with when you created me to serve the needs of our clan. The potential for great power was there, but sacrifices had to be made. You feared losing yourself as they urged you along the path that they were so eager for you to take. And you understood their concerns. You know that they were disappointed when _he_ did not prove out to be powerful enough. For all they tried to push him, his heart exceeded his potential and he died still trying to be who they wanted. You saw yourself being pushed along that same path and you created me to give them what they wanted. And in return, I indulged you quietly, during nights under the full moon…on cool mornings in the gardens…anytime that no one was looking or expecting. It was an unspoken promise that I would give them the power they sought in their leader, but would also make certain that the one who gave himself over to their service did not cease to exist."

"And where does that leave you?" Bya asked softly.

"Why is that important?" Byakuya countered.

"Why is that important?" Bya repeated, frowning, "It's important, because you have been left to bear the greatest weight…but have…"

"I have you. And because I have you, there is something of substance inside me that occasionally gifts me with the presence of those who can look through me and see you."

"Like Hisana…and Renji?"

"Yes."

Bya frowned thoughtfully as he washed Byakuya's hair, then stepped back, his heart catching at the bruises and cuts on his counterpart's white flesh.

"Byakuya-sama…"

"I told you not to call me that, Bya."

"Byakuya, then…"

"Hmmm…"

"You are wrong about something."

Byakuya's eyes met Bya's questioningly.

"You are wrong about Renji."

"How am I wrong?"

"He doesn't look through you. He sees us both. I think he loves us both."

"Then you are fooling yourself."

Bya shook his head firmly.

"He does…and what's more…I think you love him also."

"Then you are an idiot. Abarai is in love with you. You are the one he took to bed. He didn't even miss me."

Byakuya turned off the water and stepped out of the shower with Bya on his heels. They dried themselves and wrapped themselves in the clean yukatas, then Byakuya led Bya to the attendant's recess, where he motioned for Bya to lie down in the bed there.

"Would you like me to make you sleep until I return?" the noble asked, "It will make the time go faster."

Bya shook his head.

"Could you leave the garden doors opened so that I can see the stars and moon? I will still be safe under seal and shield…"

Byakuya nodded.

"If you wish."

He left the room and returned a few minutes later with a cup of hot tea, which he set at Bya's bedside. He watched for a moment as Bya sat back against the pillows and took a sip of tea.

"Is there anything else you require before I go?" he asked, "Are you certain you would rather not sleep?"

"I will be all right now," Bya said calmly, "This will give me time to think. Maybe I'll come up with something that will help."

"Very well, then. But do attempt to rest. We will require our full strength to see us through what is to come, I think."

Bya nodded silently and finished the rest of his tea. He leaned back against the pillows, his eyelids drooping. Byakuya watched quietly as the sedative he had added to the tea took effect and Bya dropped off to sleep. He moved forward, leaning over his counterpart and checking to make certain he slept comfortably. Satisfied all was well, he turned away and set the shield in place around the attendant's recess. He moved into the dressing area and removed his yukata, then began to dress for the council meeting. A sudden sound out in the room made him pause, then step out into the room dressed only in his hakama. He froze as his personal senkaimon appeared, opened, and allowed someone entrance into his room. As the senkaimon disappeared, he stood facing Renji, now highly aware of the fact that he was only partially dressed. The redhead stared at him for a moment, then lowered his eyes.

"My apologies, Captain."

"How is it you were able to use my personal senkaimon to invade my home, Renji?" he asked calmly.

"Oh…" Renji said, his face flushing slightly, "I was given access to it while I cared for Bya…before. I…am sorry for misusing the privilege, but I…"

Byakuya turned away and lowered the shield around Bya's bed in the attendant's recess. Renji stared in surprise as Byakuya turned away without another word and returned to the dressing area. The noble reached for his uniform top, but froze as he spotted Renji's reflection in the mirror. He studied the redhead's eyes for a moment without turning.

"What do you want, Renji?" he asked quietly, "I lowered the shield for you. He will not wake as I gave him a sedative, but you may lie down with him if you wish. That _is _why you are here?"

Renji hesitated for a moment.

"I am here to make sure Bya is all right…but…Captain, you look like you could use some healing first. You should have had those wounds seen to when you got here."

"I am fine, Abarai," Byakuya said, placing his top around his shoulders and reaching for the tie.

He caught his breath in surprise as the top was pulled away and his battered torso was bared again.

"What are you doing?" he asked, a bit breathlessly, "I told you…"

"I know. I heard you…and I ignored you. Come on," he said, taking the noble's hand and turning him back out of the dressing area.

"Don't be ridiculous…" muttered Byakuya, "I am fine."

"Yeah…you look fine. Please, Captain, don't be difficult. Just sit down and let me see to these."

"This is a waste of time," Byakuya said dismissively as he sat down on the bed, "I am late for a meeting of council."

"In the middle of the night?" Renji mused, shaking his head, "They couldn't let you get a good night's sleep first?"

"The situation is…unusual," Byakuya said, his mind distracted by the soft touch of Renji's hand and the flare of healing power on a bruised shoulder, "They see the danger in what's happening…and would…act quickly to d-defuse it."

Renji's hand slid down his spine, sending a soft shiver through him.

"Yeah…well, they can at least wait until you're healed."

"I told you…"

"You're fine," Renji finished, "I'm not deaf, nor am I stupid."

"You broke into my house," Byakuya said shortly, "That indicates both stupidity and a death wish."

"Nice Captain. I'll thank you to hold off on the insults, at least until I'm done healing you."

"And what will I have to say to you then?"

Renji smiled.

"I know better than to hope for a 'Thank you, Vice Captain.' I'll settle for you not carrying out that death threat for me breaking in."

"Very well," Byakuya said, relaxing somewhat, "I'll consider that."

Renji continued the healing in silence for several minutes.

"So, you toured the farthest reaches of the land of the hollows, ne?" he said, breaking the silence, "What was it like?"

Byakuya barely managed to avoid rolling his eyes.

"It was…dusty."

"Hmmm…" the redhead said, watching a flush rise on the noble's cheeks as his hand followed a cut that meandered down one pale hip, "Hmmm…I think I'll need you to…"

"No…Abarai, it's…"

He fell silent as Renji pushed against him and slid a hand down beneath his hakama.

"That's not…necessary…"

"What?" said Renji, making him flush more deeply as it struck Byakuya how close their faces were together…and how good the redhead smelled, "You would have me do an incomplete job of healing you? That doesn't sound like my captain…not at all. You sure you're not an imposter?"

"Abarai…does this situation really strike you as being funny?" he asked, a bit more sharply than he meant to.

Renji stared at him for a moment.

"No…no, I don't think it's funny. I was…just trying to lighten your mood. You looked…unhappy."

Byakuya sighed and looked away.

"You can save your humor for your boyfriend, Bya. I have no need for 'cheering up.' I am…"

"…a very bad liar," Renji finished.

Before Byakuya could move, he leaned forward and stunned the noble again by placing a gentle kiss on his lips. Byakuya drew back, bringing his fingers to his lips, as though having been burned.

"Wh-why?" he stammered, "What are you doing? What about…?"

Renji met his eyes apologetically.

"It took me a while to figure out what was going on, Captain…but…"

"We still don't know what's going on," Byakuya corrected him.

He shook off the tension the sudden kiss had caused him and stood. Renji remained on the bed, looking up at him.

"I know that when I look at you, I see the stubborn, proud captain I've always known…but…something was missing."

"Yes…you mentioned that when you washed your hands of me and went after him. _He_ is the one you…"

Renji stood and Byakuya took a step back. The two stared at each other for several long moments.

"This isn't the time for this, Abarai," Byakuya said quietly, "I have to leave."

He flash stepped to the doorway.

"Watch him until I return and do not leave this room. The meeting shouldn't take long and I will be back. Then we can discuss the charges I'll file against you for sexual harassment if you ever kiss me like that again."

"Huh…" Renji huffed, "A military tribunal would only congratulate me for being brave enough to try it."

"Or lucky enough to not pay with your life," Byakuya muttered, turning away.

He stopped for a moment with his back to the redhead.

"Arigato, Renji…for the healing."

He flash stepped away before his stunned vice captain could answer.


	15. Matters of the Heart

**Chapter 15: Matters of the Heart**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**Beaten and lost, I wandered the desert alone…only half a person. The desert had no beginning or end, and was as empty as my heart. But just as I collapsed upon the sand and let my tears of frustration be swallowed by the dryness, your love came down like rain…and the world burst into life again.**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

"The floor is given to Lord Byakuya."

The noble stood at the head of the council meeting table, observing the proud faces of the Kuchiki elders. He knew just what was needed to quell the concerns of the group before him, and being well versed in statescraft, he delivered that reassurance flawlessly.

"You have all heard of the attack that took place near the shinigami base in Hueco Mundo recently. I was attacked by a powerful hollow and, it appears, I was subjected to its odd effects. It appears that the creature was able to shear off a portion of my own self and while the greater, more powerful portion was borne away and deposited deep in the desert, the smaller, more vulnerable part was left here…and it caused the oddness to which our clan was subjected recently. While we do not yet know all of the details of how to resolve this situation, I have acted to contain the problem by finding and placing this portion of myself under careful protection while the situation is fully analyzed and steps are taken to resolve it."

"It is not surprising to us to hear that this other…weaker part of yourself was not truly you. We, of course, recognized his odd behavior and placed him in your vice captain's care. We wanted to be sure he did not do anything to embarrass you. It seems we were correct in taking that action," said the head elder, "Lord Byakuya, we are relieved to see that you have returned, but…what action will be taken with this other person? Although only a part of your soul…he is a part of you. Yet…he also seems a bit of a liability, ne? His odd behavior is sometimes…startling…and he could reflect poorly on you if not…"

Byakuya bit back the sharp response that leapt into his mind and forced his reiatsu to remain calm.

Their reaction to Bya is hardly unexpected, yet…

"I have him under my protection and have assured those he is in contact with that he is harmless. I will see that his exposure to others is restricted so that the effect on the clan will be minimal. I assure you…the situation will be resolved to our mutual satisfaction soon."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that I have a very competent other researching the hollow and how to deal with its effects. We will know more soon and I will, of course, inform the council of action to be taken towards resolution."

"Well," said the head elder, "we are relieved to hear that, Lord Byakuya. We were taken aback by the appearance of this…look alike. It is good to know that you are in control as he seemed more than a bit…unbalanced."

Byakuya felt a hot flare of anger under his skin, but forced it away. He hated himself for what he said next, but knew it was necessary.

"Yes…well…he is contained, and I will not allow him to embarrass our clan any further."

"Thank you, Lord Byakuya."

He sat quietly as the meeting was brought to a conclusion, his mind straying to the other who slept soundly in the attendant's recess in his room. He forced himself not to think about the fact that he and Abarai were alone together. Knowing that left him unsettled for reasons he couldn't understand and didn't want to address. He sighed softly, standing as the meeting ended, and starting towards the door. As he reached it, a wave of dizziness passed over him and he felt a harsh, gripping sensation in his midsection. He wondered briefly if it meant that harm had come to Bya and Renji…and the thought pushed him into a flash step. But as his power engaged, the feeling of dizziness became overpowering and the heavy sensation in his body worsened.

"Lord Byakuya?" a voice said somewhere behind him.

_What is going on?_

He tried again to move, but his body refused to obey him, and a moment later, he collapsed entirely.

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji rested quietly with Bya sleeping in his arms, his eyes focused on the sky outside the open garden doors. He sighed softly, thinking back to Byakuya's response to his kiss. He had known his captain a long time and knew him better than most people. He was kicking himself for not realizing right away when Byakuya returned, what had to have happened.

He's always been quiet and closed off, but I felt that presence beneath everything. And I did love knowing that there was a gentler, more affectionate side to him…but I also loved his complexity…the way he could be so powerful…frightening, one minute, then I would catch him out daydreaming under the moon and stars only a short time later. Yeah…I've always known he was a really complicated person. I forgot that when Bya appeared…I think because I was so focused on protecting him. I forgot that while Bya has a lot of vulnerability right there at the surface, Byakuya's is carefully hidden. I guess, considering his responsibilities, that it would have to be. I wonder what's going to happen to him…if he can be…put back together…

He gazed down at Bya's sleeping face and felt his heart twinge just thinking about losing him…

Of course, it wouldn't really be losing him. He would just go back to being submerged inside Byakuya…nearly invisible to most, but not gone.

But even knowing that, he felt his arms tighten involuntarily around the sleeping shinigami he held.

In any case, while he's here, I'm not going to miss the chance to enjoy this close contact with him…

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a disturbance outside the seal. He registered a short cry, then the sounds of the guard detail gathering and searching the grounds. He got up from the bed and moved to the garden doors, passing through the protective barrier as the watch guard captain approached.

"What is it?" he asked quickly.

"Something killed one of the guards. In the darkness, he couldn't see exactly what it was…but…we sensed hollow reiatsu."

"Hollow reiatsu…" Renji repeated, "Then it may be the hollow that has been trying to attack the captain!"

He turned with the watch guard captain to assist with the search, but was nearly thrown off his feet as the hollow exploded out of the bushes near them and charged towards the sealed room. Renji flash stepped towards the creature, drawing his sword and slashed at it. The strike was deflected and the creature sent a blast of red fire at the seal. The seal glowed and sputtered, but held as Renji charged at the creature, slashing at it again. This time, he made contact with the beast.

But as he did, Bya came awake screaming and holding his hands to the same area where he had cut the hollow.

Oh my kami! It's like Kisuke said…not like it's as simple as killing the hollow! Are they…joined? Does this mean that Bya is really a hollow? Or…is it more complicated than that…?

"Wait!" he shouted, grabbing the watch commander's weapon as the hollow reeled, took an unsteady step, then disappeared.

"What did you do that for?" demanded the watch guard captain, "I was ready to finish him!"

"Look!" Renji said, pointing to the bedroom, where Bya had collapsed on the floor near the bed, "When we attacked it, we also injured him! I want you to make it your top priority to capture, but do not kill, that hollow!"

"Yes, sir!" agreed the watch captain, "I'll assemble a capture team and begin the search right away!"

Renji turned and passed back through the seal, dropping to his knees as he reached Bya's side.

"Bya!" he called frantically, "Bya, can you hear me? Bya!"

He lifted the limp body into his arms and flash stepped out into the gardens, then to the front of the manor and off down the twisting streets to the healing center. As he ran, he stole glances down at the pale, unconscious man he held and tried not to think about what all of it could mean. He reached the healing center and was surprised to see the whole contingent of the council of Kuchiki Elders in the waiting area. The head elder approached him, calling for a healer.

"Abarai-san," he said quickly, "What happened?"

"The hollow that attacked Captain Kuchiki tried to attack Bya again."

"But Lord Byakuya said he was under a protective seal…"

Renji felt a sense of wariness inside and opted not to fully explain.

"He was…It's complicated. But what happened to Captain Kuchiki?"

"We don't know," the elder told him, "He seemed fine during the meeting, but all at once, he seemed to grow dizzy…and he looked as though he hurt badly inside…then he collapsed."

Shades! This just gets worse and worse! Are they…all connected somehow? Are they all affected by my attack on the hollow? Damn it! We have to capture that hollow!

"Vice Captain Abarai!" called Hanatarou from the entrance to the waiting room, "Bring…"

He glanced at Bya questioningly.

"Bring him this way. Captain Unohana is waiting."

Renji followed the seventh seat out of the waiting area and down the hall. He carried Bya into the examination room, where Captain Unohana was already leaning over Byakuya. Hanatarou guided Renji to a second bed in the room, where Renji set the unconscious Bya down, then moved to the far side of the bed to stay out of the way as the nobles were examined. Captain Unohana looked up at Renji and smiled.

"Something tells me that you may have information that would be beneficial at this point," she said quietly.

"Yeah," said Renji, "a lot has gone on since he was here recovering from that hollow attack. I don't have all of the pieces, but…"

He broke off as the door opened and Kisuke Urahara stepped into the room.

"Kami, it's good to see you!" Renji sighed, "All hell is breaking loose!"

"I imagine," said the shopkeeper, "I can help some, but I don't have all of the answers we are going to need. But at least I can shed some light on things."

"I've determined what part of the problem is," said Captain Unohana, "It seems that Captain Kuchiki's soul consistency has fallen to a dangerous level…but that is not necessarily what caused his collapse."

"No…it probably isn't," agreed Kisuke, "I had some time to research this a little, using the reiatsu samples I collected from these two. It seems that something pretty complicated happened when Captain Kuchiki was attacked."

"I see," said the healer, "and what did you find?"

"Well, first," Kisuke said, "These two may be in separate bodies, but every single test I ran concluded the same thing. They are the same person."

"The…same person," repeated Unohana, her head tilting as she continued to study Byakuya, "How is that possible? I have never heard of such a thing."

"No, you likely haven't," said Kisuke, "because the existence of this phenomenon is only recorded in an ancient myth."

The healer's eyes narrowed.

"I am quite well read in shinigami and human lore and I…"

"It's from hollow lore."

"Ah…" said the healer, "and if anyone knows about hollows and hollowfication, it is you…of course."

"Well…it does resonate with me…for many reasons. In any case, the myth I came across involves an ancient gathering of strong hollows who were trying to create order in Hueco Mundo. They gathered together and tried to come up with ways to pool their strength and control the marauding bands of hollows roaming the land. Normally, the way to do that is for one to be chosen to devour the others…and then that one would be made stronger. But these felt that this process would not be enough. They indulged in a number of beastly experiments and found that it might be possible to cleave together the best pieces of their souls to filter out the unwanted weaknesses and to create a pure hollow…a divine hollow of unspeakable power, who the other hollows would have no choice but to accept as their leader. They finally created a hollow that could splice the souls of other hollows…and they worked on perfecting the means of binding the pieces of souls together. Unfortunately, they found that the whole thing was a failure. In addition, splicing hollow was stronger than they thought. It attacked and killed them, then fled. No one in known history has verified the existence of the hollow. It was written off as a dead myth long ago. But if this is the hollow that attacked Captain Kuchiki, it would explain his situation. You found a problem with his soul consistency, ne?"

The healer nodded.

"His soul consistency is at about half normal…and threatening to deteriorate. And if this hollow is the one you spoke of, that would make sense. It spliced away the less emotive, more ruthless and powerful part of Captain Kuchiki and sent it away into the depths of Hueco Mundo, and left behind the inner core…the 'heart,' if you will."

"Right," Kisuke said, shaking his head, "The thing is…this hollow seems not to be focused on creating a divine hollow, but uses its power as a form of devastating attack. I haven't figured out the exact details of how it works, but there seems to have also been a splicing away of the hollow. The stronger portion has been seeking to kill Bya ever since he returned…and Captain Kuchiki told me that while he was in the desert, he encountered a docile, powerless version of that same hollow…well, we don't know for a fact that it's the other half. But given the battle…and the fact it was seen near where Captain Kuchiki was sent…"

"It bears consideration," said Unohana thoughtfully.

"There's something else," Renji said suddenly, making their eyes turn to him, "I think there's some kind of a link between Captain Kuchiki, Bya and this hollow. Back at the manor, I scored a solid hit on the creature when it tried to attack Bya. But as I did, Bya screamed and collapsed. And I'm willing to bet that that's when Byakuya collapsed at the council hall too!"

"And if that's so…" Unohana began.

"Then we need to catch that hollow and get the four of them in one place…then try to figure out how to put Captain Kuchiki back together."

"But something bothers me," noted Captain Unohana, "If they are linked, and they all respond to damage done to the hollow, the reciprocal would seem to not hold true. Otherwise the creature would not dare to kill any part of Captain Kuchiki."

"But if it is the creature of myth…and it has mutated its power into a form of attack, that would make sense. Look at it this way…he splices the soul, sending the stronger part deep into the desert…and sending his own weaker part to a safe location he has chosen. The strongest part of him then attacks the weakest part of his enemy. The weaker one dies and takes the stronger into death with it…but Bya said that the hollow told him that once he killed Bya, the hollow would be made whole again…so it looks as though the hollow killing his target causes the hollow to be rejoined."

"But it doesn't work the other way," commented Renji, shaking his head, "Damn!"

"I believe that if the hollow is killed before this is resolved, Captain Kuchiki will die," Kisuke said.

Everyone fell silent and stood gazing at the two manifestations of the sixth division captain.

"So…how do we get them back into one…body?" asked Renji.

"I do not know that," said Captain Unohana, "but I can stabilize their soul consistency to allow all of you time to capture the hollow and to figure this out."

"And once Byakuya and Bya are back on their feet, we'll take a look at the Kuchiki Family Archive to see if there are any records of that mythical Splicing Hollow. The clan archive is likely to have something about it somewhere, but only Byakuya can get us in past the protections on it."

"Then I will treat them to strengthen their soul consistency," said the healer, "Just realize that I can only give this treatment once. After that, you must resolve this quickly or Captain Kuchiki will begin to fade."

"All right," said Renji, "It looks like we all have something to do. I'll focus on catching that hollow…and I think the best way to do that is to stay close to Bya. I'm sure it will come after him again."

"Sounds good," said Kisuke, "but you'll take Ichigo with you. If that thing is the Splicing Hollow from the myth, then you won't be able to handle it alone. So you three will work together and Byakuya and I will search the archive. We'll find a way out of this…"

"Yeah…" agreed Renji, "We sure as hell will."

But inside, he wondered if it would really be possible. He felt a catch in his heart as his eyes moved from Byakuya to Bya and back again.

We have to find a way…

I'm not going to lose him…


	16. The Whole of Me

**Chapter 16: The Whole of Me**

**(Hey guys! This is a brand-fire new chapter and includes a lovely erotic exchange sure to set a few things around you on fire, so please, please please review. I promise to be good and keep the updates _coming_...again and again! lol)**

**XXXXXXXXXX**

_**Light and dark, angel and demon, living in a precarious balance. What lies on the surface and what lies beneath, I am a living mystery, waiting for you to understand.**_

**XXXXXXXXXX**

"Shouldn't you be going to meet Kisuke at the clan archive?" asked Renji, "Bya and I are safe enough together, now that we are here at the manor and under guard."

Byakuya glanced at Bya, who met his eyes quietly for a moment, then looked down at the walkway.

"Byakuya and I think that the three of us need to talk for a while first."

Byakuya nodded in agreement.

"I have given Kisuke and Yoruichi a token that will allow them to enter the archive to begin the search for information about that hollow. I will go to join them as soon as we have talked."

"Okay," agreed Renji, following Bya through the garden doors, into the noble's bedroom, then watching as Byakuya followed them inside and closed the large, double doors and raised a protective barrier.

Bya moved to the bed and sat down, his eyes still lowered and his expression troubled. Renji frowned and sat down next to him, while Byakuya stood nearby.

"Hey, you okay?" the redhead asked, slipping a hand into Bya's and seeking his eyes.

"I am all right," Bya said, yielding a faint smile as Renji brushed the hair away from his face and kissing him on the cheek and mouth, "I think it is just everything catching up with me."

Renji sighed worriedly.

"You haven't been yourself since you got back from Las Noches," he commented, "There hasn't really been time for us to talk about it, but it looks like we have time now."

"Would you prefer that I leave?" asked Byakuya.

"No," Bya said, looking from one to the other, "I think it is time that he should know the whole truth about us."

"You know something more about the..." Renji began.

"This isn't about the hollow," Bya said, interrupting him, "And it's not about what happened in Las Noches. Aizen wasn't able to hurt me. This is different. It's about..._us_...Byakuya and me."

Renji looked back at him quietly and nodded.

"Okay."

"I know that you've been thinking that I am the 'weaker' side of Byakuya and he is the stronger."

"C'mon, Bya, you know I don't think you're weak."

"I am not physically weaker. My hakudo and flash step are equal to his, but what I meant is that he wields our power, Renji."

"Yeah," the redhead chuckled, "That and your more brutal side."

He paused, noting the hurt look on Bya's face.

"Don't say that. He isn't being that way because he wants to."

"I know that," Renji said quickly, "I was just..."

"Renji, the truth is that when we were one being, it wasn't ever that Byakuya held me back. It wasn't like that at all. I wasn't too weak to overpower him and show myself. And he wasn't being cruel because he chose it. We were that way because we had to be that way...to survive."

"I don't know if I understand you," Renji said, frowning, "What are you telling me, Bya?"

"Everyone thinks that I am weak without Byakuya, but the truth is, I am the part that is strongest. Byakuya Kuchiki has a very strong heart...a heart so strong that it actually broke itself so as not to disappoint the ones who looked to him for strength after the death of his father."

"What?" Renji said, his eyes widening.

"Soujun Kuchiki and his wife were both exceedingly gentle people. They were loving and kind, schooled in history and the arts. But Soujun was heir, and that was a huge responsibility. He accepted it gracefully, and even though his talents weren't enough to achieve bankai, he remained at his father's side, forsaking his own loves and embracing his role in the family as heir. But that came crashing down when he was killed."

Renji's eyes grew sad and he slipped an arm around Bya.

"I 'm sorry you had to go through that," he said, looking up and meeting Byakuya's eyes as well with surprising sympathy, "That's got to have been hard."

"It wasn't just losing my father. It was that the position of 'heir' was placed on my shoulders at a very young age. And I was proving out to be quite powerful, so the elders were eager for me to move forward. They rushed to have me confirmed and pressured Ginrei to make sure that my strong emotions and quick temper were controlled. Surrounded by them and without the quiet, heartfelt guidance from my father, I went to war with myself. I was determined that I should be the heir they wanted. I wasn't going to disappoint them. It meant so much to my father for me to serve as he had not been able to because of his lesser powers. But although my powers were sufficient, the elders were unhappy with my rebellious nature. We clashed forcibly at times. I realized quickly that, as I was, I wasn't the person that our clan needed. At the same time, I wanted some part of my father's legacy to survive. So...I created him."

Renji frowned curiously.

"You _created_ him?"

"Yes. I am emotive and high strung at heart. I hate wars and battle, and I would rather walk in my gardens and look up at the moon and forget everything else. But I couldn't be that kind of person and lead the clan. Neither could I give them what they wanted without losing myself...so I simply created an outer visage that they wanted and sealed the rest down inside the depths of my heart. But...when the hollow separated us, that part I never meant to show again was expelled."

"You," Renji said wonderingly, "You're his heart?"

"I am _our_ heart," Bya corrected him, "And he is our strength. But even though we are separated, we still need each other."

Bya swallowed hard, looking from Byakuya to Renji.

"And there is one more thing we both need, Renji," he said in a softer voice.

Renji froze as Byakuya slid onto the bed and wrapped his arms around him from behind while Bya turned and sought his mouth hungrily.

"We need you, Renji," Byakuya breathed into his ear, making a line of slow line of kisses along the side of his throat.

"We are in love with you," Bya confessed, "Both of us..._all of me._"

"Bya," Renji said, feeling a hot blush roar from one end of his body to the other, "Byakuya, you mean that you...?"

"I want you _inside me_," Bya whispered onto his lips, lying down on his back and pulling Renji down on top of him.

"And I want _to possess you_," Byakuya hissed almost threateningly in his ear, pressing down against the redhead's back so that Renji could feel his stiffened arousal.

"Y-you two want me to...?" Renji managed dizzily, his wildest, horniest, craziest dreams suddenly flashing before his eyes, "Oh gods, I don't think I..."

"Shh," Byakuya scolded him, licking the back of his neck and beginning a scathing exploration of the tattoos there, while Bya's mouth busied his and both versions of Renji's captain rubbed against him, front and back, sending shivers of delight through him and making him moan hungrily, "This isn't the time for you to be _thinking_, Abarai. Shut up and make love to us."

"But Captain, I thought that you..."

He yelped as Byakuya fingers threaded into his hair and tightened threateningly.

"I said shut up," Byakuya snapped warningly, "Do not make me repeat it."

"Are you listening to this?" he managed between Bya's amorous kisses, "He's abusing me, here!"

Bya cracked a gray eye open and smirked at him.

"Maybe you should do what he says, Renji," he suggested blithely, "You don't know what he might do if you anger him."

"That's enough, _you_!" Renji laughed.

He inhaled sharply as wetted fingers slid down his back and sought his entrance.

"Ah...ah Captain, look. The truth is...well, I've never been taken."

He felt Byakuya's intense glare so that the blush on his whole body deepened.

"Well," said the noble, pressing harder against his back and continuing to prepare him, "then it is about time for you to be a bit more generous, ne? I let you inside me, so you will suffer me inside you."

"F-fuck!" Renji gasped as he felt the size of the member that Byakuya was preparing to penetrate him with, "Both? At the s-same time? Captain, I don't know if I can...I mean I want to, but this is...C-captain?"

"I would suggest that you cease babbling and enter my counterpart. Once I enter you, you will not have the presence of mind to move. But don't worry. We will do that for you," Byakuya said, the words burning in the redhead's flushed ears.

"Oh!" Renji panted dazedly, hastening to comply, "Oh good...g-good...oh...OH MY FUCKING GODS!"

As he joined his body with Bya's, Byakuya began a long, slow entry from behind, holding Renji tightly and biting at the back of his neck possessively. Bya read the instant effect on Renji's bright red face, and hastily moved to hold him back from climaxing too soon. He watched closely, enjoying the intense reactions in Renji's shaking body and holding still until Byakuya was fully entrenched in the redhead. Byakuya paused for a moment, loosing short, scathing breaths that further riled Renji's burgeoning arousal and made him moan feverishly as he couldn't help pleading aloud for the noble to move.

Byakuya's sarcastic laugh rumbled against his back, mated with a sweeter one that issued from beneath him.

"Patience, Renji," Byakuya panted against the back of a sweating, tattooed shoulder, "All in good time."

He shifted slightly, making Renji groan and curse, then began a slow, intense motion that had Renji moaning rapturously again almost instantly. The redhead's fingers tore at the bedding as he was penetrated deeply, and his hips were forced into Bya's.

"Holy hell!" Renji exclaimed, riled by Bya teasing his erect nipples, while Byakuya nipped sharply at his earlobe, "What in kami's name did I do to deserve this? W-was I bad or was I good? Ah...hah! Who gives a shit...f-feels so damned good, Captain! Bya!"

The three men moved together, the erotic sensations rocketing through their writhing forms and their pleasure rising until it began to overflow. Renji and Bya screamed in release and Byakuya loosed a deep growl of satisfaction as they climaxed as one, collapsing in a breathless heap onto the bed.

They rested then, in a tangle of bodies, still exchanging warm finishing kisses. Byakuya made a sound of surprise as Renji curled up on his chest and started to drop off to sleep. Bya simply smiled and wound his body around Renji's back.

"Bya," Byakuya queried over Renji's senseless head.

"Hmmm?"

"Did that bother you?"

Bya didn't pretend to misunderstand.

"Not at all. I would have been sad if he couldn't love all of me."

Suddenly the coldness in Byakuya's eyes seemed to diminish.

"Ah."

Bya smiled as Byakuya's fingers suddenly laced together with his.

"I see."

XXXXXXXXXX

Are you finding anything?" Kisuke asked in a frustrated voice, "Because, except for those few references, I just am not finding much."

"I don't know if it helps, but I did find this," Yoruichi said, handing Kisuke an opened book.

The shopkeeper perused the page it was opened to, then turned to the next and froze, staring at the picture on the page. Yoruichi met his eyes warily.

"What is it? Did you find something?"

"Yeah...and not something good."

"What is it?"

"It's about Bya," Kisuke said solemnly, "Look at this."

Yoruichi stared at the drawing of a hollow, split in two and one half surrounded in flares of errant power. Slowly Kisuke turned to the next page and their eyes darkened with worry.

"Damn," Kisuke breathed, "We have to find both halves of that hollow now!"

Yoruichi nodded in agreement.

"If we don't, Bya's power is going to make him hollowfy, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Kisuke said, shaking his head, "There's no two way about it. See? The hollows that made the splitter hollow made a pretty glaring mistake. They assumed that the side with all of the power would become the divine hollow. But, what really happened was that the 'heart' was needed. Hollows don't have hearts, but shinigamis do. The hollows couldn't transcend by way of the splitter hollow, but a shinigami can. This is really bad. I guess Aizen wasn't blowing smoke before. Bya may not be a monster now, but he will be if he isn't reintegrated with Byakuya soon. C'mon. Let's go back and tell them what we found."

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji woke to find his naked body deliciously sandwiched between the two versions of his lovely captain. He sighed contentedly, finding Bya's hand under the blankets and curling their fingers together as Byakuya's dark eyes opened and met his warmly.

"So...do we understand each other now?" he asked.

"Yeah," Renji said, blushing, "I get it. And I'm glad, you know? It works out."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," Renji said, seeking Byakuya's lips and laughing softly as Bya's hands began to tease his privates, "I love _all of you_, and when you are reintegrated with Bya, you will still love me. But Captain, I knew that you wanted me before. That wasn't what the problem was."

"I understand," Byakuya answered quietly, licking Renji's lips slowly, then touching his face lightly, "You are worried that when we are made one again, I will go back to the way I was before. But...I can see now that I was wrong to mislead you as I did, teasing you on the one hand and pushing you away with the other. That was wrong and I am sorry that I hurt you, Renji. That wasn't my intent."

"Yeah, I know. And don't worry about it. I'm not scared...well, not of that anyway. I just want this to be over with, and I want you back the way you were."

"We all want that now," Bya said, his eyes peaceful, "We both know it is best."

"Aww, but I will sure miss the way you would cling to me...how you couldn't hold anything back, and damn! I really, really loved seeing you in those tight leather pants!"

"L-leather pants?" Byakuya repeated, his eyes widening.

He caught himself and let out a disgusted breath.

"I do not think I want to know about that..."

Renji laughed and nuzzled closer to him, smiling more widely as Bya stretched out along his back.

"I'll miss this too...having both of you!"

Byakuya's eyes narrowed agggressively.

"You haven't _had_ me."

"But he will," said Bya, meeting Byakuya's eyes meaningfully, "You did say that it was only fair that he accept both, so we should as well."

Renji chuckled at the icy glare the two of them received in return. He opened his mouth to say more, but closed it again as footsteps pounded on the walkway, heading for Byakuya's room. The three staggered out of bed and wrapped their naked bodies in yukatas, pulling them into place as Kisuke and Yoruichi burst into the room.

"Don't you know how to knock?" Renji asked, scowling at them.

"We found something that we think you should..."

Kisuke broke off, looking appraisingly from the piqued Byakuya to the blushing Bya, then to Renji.

"What's wrong?" Byakuya asked impatiently.

"Uh...ah, well, we just found that we need to get that hollow caught and get you guys changed back quickly."

"Because our bodies are deteriorating," Byakuya acknowledged, "But, is there something else?"

"I get now what Aizen was trying to tell us before. Byakuya, if we don't get you put back together soon, Bya's kokoro nakigore is going to make him hollowfy."

"What?"

"Bya is going to hollowfy, if we don't stop it...and he won't just be a hollow, but a hollow god!"


End file.
